His Continued Work

As you do not know what is the way of the wind, or how the bones grow in the womb of her who is with child, so you do not know the works of God who makes everything. Ecclesiastes 11:5 (New King James Version)

Just over fifty-one years ago, God finished forming me in my mother’s womb. I don’t know how He caused me to grow and develop inside of her, yet that did not stop Him from doing so. And I don’t understand all the ways He has chosen to work in my life since the day of my birth, but that too has not stopped Him from doing so. With that said, this is becoming a day of reflection for me.

God has woven together the pieces of my life which have included joy and sorrow, tears and laughter, relationships and loneliness, successes and failures, gains and losses, and so on. I have not always understood what He was doing and why He was doing it, but I am realizing more and more that He really is doing what is good for me and glorifying for Himself. Peace and joy abound when I embrace His choices, plans, and purposes for me. When I strain against Him, I lose every time.

Several years ago, God began showing me what He was like. His heart has been revealed to me through His Word as well as through the body of Christ. As He has corrected my distorted view of Himself my life has been changed. Those revelations and corrections have often been the subjects of many devotionals. He still has much to teach me but I marvel at what He has done so far. Up until recently much of the journey has been about learning the truth about God. But God is clearly letting me know He is now choosing to help me learn the truth about myself. In His wisdom He first allowed me to feel safe with Him. And now within that safety I can open myself up to His view and knowledge of me.

He is tender yet persistent in showing me where I am broken, where I have been affected by childhood experiences, my misunderstandings of relationships, and my mistaken ways of getting needs met. He is also showing me where I fail to trust Him and accept what He offers me each day. Just a short while ago I bent the knee and shed tears over my refusal to embrace His reason for bringing in and removing individuals in my life. The inability to move forward has finally been removed as His forgiveness and mercy have been extended to me once again.

I share with you each morning NOT as one who has ‘arrived’ but as one who is learning. I struggle and I succeed on a daily basis. I bleed when I am cut and I cry when I am hurt. The difference is I have finally learned to admit it all to God and other believers. I choose to continue to live my life with the perspective and power that comes from God’s heart and hands as I walk with Him.

Father, sometimes I feel like I barely know You or myself. Continue to reveal Yourself to me and expose me to the truth about myself. With You I am safe to see both. Amen.

Warrior is a Child/Do I Trust You - Twila Paris
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Pzu-jWpcdw

Fixing my eyes on Jesus, the Author and Finisher of my faith!

Unnecessarily Alone

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: if one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Ecclesiastes 4:9,10 (New International Version)

If I broke my leg, I would have no trouble seeking the help of a doctor. If my car broke down, a mechanic would be the one I turn to. A tooth ache would send me to the dentist. I also have no trouble stopping and asking for directions if I am obviously lost. The help of others is invaluable during these times and many others. We can see that and readily agree. So why is it that we grasp this truth for our physical needs but fail to accept it for emotional or spiritual needs. God never intended for us to be “lone ranger” Christians.

Throughout Scripture we read phrases such as: pray for one another, encourage one another, comfort one another, strengthen one another, help one another, love one another, give to one another, fellowship with one another, admonish one another, esteem one another, praise one another, build up one another, forgive one another, and so on. We also see the many times God used people as instruments for healing, leading, instructing, and teaching. They are not a replacement for God but they are definitely a gift from God.

While God desires for me to have an intimate, personal walk with Him, He has never failed to bring significant people into my life to assist me in my growth as a Christian. I have a list of precious individuals whom God wove into my life at just the right times. I would not be who I am today without them. I have sought their advice, received their nurturing, and been helped tremendously by them. I treasure each one!

With that said, I find there are still times I think I have to make it on my own through the valleys, mine fields, and rugged places of this journey. In order to safe guard myself from becoming dependent on another person or appearing to be needy, I decide to go it alone. I remember a time when I began to wade through some internal issues. I surmised that with God, my Bible, and a “how to” book, I could do this. Six chapters into my book, I was over whelmed and fully aware of my need for help! Getting that help required prayer, honesty, and transparency on my part. People are willing to help if I will just take a step forward and ask them. As I take the steps and ask, God graciously works out the details.

Father, You never meant for me to be a loner. You have already gifted and equipped individuals to help me and for me to help others. Continue showing me Your truth and Your way. Amen.

For Good
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uzrGFQysfYU

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Times, Reasons, and Seasons

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1 (King James Version)

Realizing that God has a time, a reason, and a season for everything in my life brings great comfort when I am going through a trial. I want to know the uncomfortable circumstances in my life serve a purpose and that there is an end in sight. I want to know life will not always be like this. I want to know that somewhere down the road there will be joy, laughter, and freedom. I want to know that the roller coaster of emotions will bring me to a place of rest.

But I am coming to realize this verse also applies to the good things of life. Those things that make me comfortable, those things I enjoy, those people who become precious to me, those relationships that put me on cloud nine. Anything I hold near and dear to my heart must be held with hands that have this verse inscribed on them. I must realize that nothing and no one this side of heaven can be considered a permanent part of my life. Just as the seasons change, just as nature itself changes, and landscapes change, our lives change. We cannot stop that. Our interactions with people will go through changes. It is natural and it is necessary.

The problem comes when I fight the change. Some people can come in and out of my life and it doesn‘t affect me much. With other people, their removal from my life can seem devastating. When I realize they are gone or the relationship has changed I can take a nose dive in my emotions and soul. I can feel that my world is falling apart and lose all sense of security and stability. It is then that I realize I have grabbed hold of them in a way I should grabbed hold of God. They have become precious to me and I don’t want to give them up.

God knows if I never experience these changes I will not draw closer to Him. I will not depend on Him as I should. I will live unsatisfied and stagnate. That is the difference between a pond and a river. A pond has life but it is very limited. A river is always moving forward and affecting the things around it. I want my life to be a river designed by God. I want Him to place the bends, the forks, and the banks in all the right places.

Father, all of life around me is changing but You and Your ways never change. You are the One constant in my life and I cling to that! Amen.

Draw Me Close To You
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ALzCQn8LA4M&feature=related