Confident and Specific

And the king said to her, “What do you wish, Queen Esther? What is your request? It shall be given to you—up to half the kingdom!” Esther 5:3 (New King James Version)

Four times King Ahasuerus (Xerxes), voiced these words to Queen Esther (Esther 5:3,6; 7:2; 9:12). He ruled over 127 provinces, so when he said, “Up to half the kingdom” it was an extravagant offer! Each time, Esther was ready with specific requests which she had thought through in advance. She stated those requests with confidence because of the king’s words to her. In essence, he was saying, “Ask and it will be given to you!” He wanted to know what was on her mind and he wanted to give her what she desired. What love and what risk! He had no idea what she was going to say and yet he made a radical promise….and KEPT it! Each and every time!

Jesus has spoken the same words to us. He said, “Ask and it shall be given unto you, seek and you will find, knock and the door shall be opened on to you.” He also said, “Ask anything in my name, and it shall be given unto you.” But one of the differences between Ahasuerus and Jesus is that Jesus already knows what we plan to ask even before we ask it!

So I am asking myself this morning whether or not I approach Jesus with the same confidence as Esther approached Ahasuerus. Am I as specific? If not, why not? I believe my answer lies in the fact that I realize God does not always give me what I ask for. It is time to look at that aspect of prayer and see the reasons He would say, “No.”

I must embrace the truth that God is able to do ALL things and that His ways are above my ways. His “no” often means, it would not be good for me to have what I am asking Him for, He has a better plan, He desires to work in a different way, or He knows what is best. It can also mean there is sin that needs to be dealt with first. In the midst of it all, He invites me to trust Him with abandon and not depend on my own understanding. As I pray I must review the character and heart of God. If God’s denial of my request leaves me with thoughts of not being loved or cared for then I am buying into lies. The truth of the matter is that Jesus has invited me to ask and that gives me confidence. His sovereignty and wisdom gives me peace.

Having said this, let me also say that I believe Jesus intends and desires to do so much more than I dare to ask. I have to wonder what would happen if I received Christ’s words in the same way that Esther received Ahasuerus’ words. May I find out!

Father, help my prayers to be both confident and specific. There is much about prayer that still eludes me but I want to learn. Lord, teach me how to pray! Amen.

Draw Me Close - Kathy Troccoli
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bgQJVfUQLho

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Breaking the Chain

But all this gives me no satisfaction as long as I see that Jew Mordecai sitting at the king's gate. Esther 5:13 (New International Version)

Haman’s satisfaction, delight, and pleasure was unfelt due to what he chose to dwell upon and what he allowed to consume him. He had vast wealth, many sons, honor bestowed upon him by the king, special treatment, and promotions, yet his disdain for Mordecai kept him from enjoying any of it. Mordecai’s refusal to show him homage ate away at him and until he could annihilate him and his people (the Jews) he would be ruled by dissatisfaction and bitterness.

I can relate with Haman’s problem. Although he was in the wrong his attitude and actions hit home with me. I know what it is like to zero in on the losses, heartaches, and difficulties of life and subsequently lose the joy of living. A friend of mine calls it focusing on the black spot on the wall. It is that minute detail that holds not only my attention but my heart as well. It is the ever present cloud over my parade. It remains in the backdrop of my thoughts, ever ready to dampen any mood, darken any room, and weaken any resolve to live differently. It is my “life would be great if it weren’t for THIS” statement. It is the tender spot that reveals the area in my life that is still in need of God’s gracious touch and healing.

Where do I begin to loosen its hold and effect on my life? Like a heavy chain that still wraps itself around my soul, I am learning I must attend to one link at a time. Links have weakened and snapped as I have acknowledged their presence, confessed my heart attitudes, and looked for truth. I am down to what feels like the last few links…..the most profound and stubborn of them all. They are being dealt with through prayer….mine as well as individuals I trust. Last night, I took the worse case scenario, the deepest thoughts and feelings about this whole situation chain and brought it to my Heavenly Father. In the quietness of the late night hours I whispered to Him, “What if my perceptions are true and it really is as bad as I think? I begin with that premise and by Your grace I choose to walk in forgiveness and acceptance.” Sleep came quickly and I woke this morning feeling a bit less like Haman.

Father, I am tired of missing out on the joy of living and the delight of knowing You. Detach me from being controlled by anyone or anything apart from Youself. Teach me the better way to live. Amen.

On My Knees - Jaci Velasquez
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gArr7gyiMBY&feature=related

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Brought Up As His Own

Mordecai had adopted her and brought her up as his own daughter. Esther 1:7b Today’s English Version

When Esther’s parents had died she was adopted by her cousin, Mordecai, and was loved, cared for, accepted, and brought up as his own daughter. She was his child in every sense of the word and he fathered her from his heart. How like our relationship with our Heavenly Father!

God’s Word says He chose us before the foundations of the world and as His adopted sons and daughters we are being brought up as His children. Not having had a close relationship with my earthly father, this truth about God is ministering to me this morning. He is bathing my spirit in the knowledge of His tender care and affection. Understanding that His love is unconditional and not dependent on what I am doing is the truth God used to start me on this journey three years ago. Everything else has been built on that foundation.

I needed to know the full extent and basis of His love when I began seeking freedom from legalism, when I was asked to resign from teaching over music choices, when I sought employment at the company I now work for, when I asked God to show me His heart in Scripture, and when He faithfully revolutionized my walk with Him. Presently, I need to continually take in the truth of His love as I experience His deeper work in my life and as I ponder what it is He would have me do for His kingdom work. His priority right now is that I learn to live each day embracing the truth of our father/daughter relationship.

So what are the things He is already whispering to me this morning? I matter to Him. He is involved in every area of my life. He is attentive to my needs. He holds my heart in His hands. He values me. He is carving out paths in my wilderness. He is wooing me to Himself. He is achieving His purpose in my life. He is bringing me to the point of finding satisfaction in Him alone. He is teaching me how to abide under the shadow of His wings. This list is like a quilt that He has woven and now places around my shoulders. From it, I take in warmth and comfort!

Someone once shared a Beth Moore quote with me. She said, “Just let God love you enough!” And God in turn says to me, “In your joy or sorrow, in your times of solitude or surrounded by friends, in your waking or sleeping moments, just let Me love you and love on you enough. I am bringing you up as my own daughter. I have no favorites. I hold nothing back. Let the knowledge of this transform you!”

Father, remove any obstacles that hinder me from taking You up on every offer You extend to me. Move Your words from my head to my heart so that I rest as
well as dance in Your presence. Amen.