Setting Me Straight

Restore us, O LORD God of hosts; cause Your face to shine, and we shall be saved! Psalm 80:19 NKJV

When we pray the very thing God desires for us, we can have full assurance of an affirmative answer! I have often looked at past mistakes, failures, and sins in such a way that I thought I had messed things up too badly for any hope of a fresh start. Because I could not change the past I seemed to think the black marks would never go away and would forever remain a part of my present. I was like the person who had broken my leg and never had the bone set straight. Walking with a limp became a normal (and sadly accepted) way of life for me. There was the continual sense that although I was forgiven I had blown it…my track record remain marred. While this should not be the case for a child of God, I strongly believe it is often the reality of many. The continual self loathing, internal condemnation, and hopelessness is not God’s doing. He knows at which point we withdraw our hands from accepting His full gift of forgiveness.

I want to go back to the broken bone analogy. Asking God to restore me is the same as asking Him to “set me straight” again, to realign me with Himself, to get me back on course. It is the reality of a fresh start! It is coming to the place of seeing that whatever has happened is unchangeable but not unforgivable. Will I dare to embrace this truth and allow it to change my view of God and myself? Not if I keep putting conditions on it and limiting its full meaning! Not if I cling to condemnation rather than grace.

I have often said that becoming a Christian and accepting God’s free gift of salvation was easy. Living out the Christian life is the hard part. Not because it isn’t possible but because I carry with me wrong mindsets, unresolved issues, and areas in my life that have yet to experience the touch of God’s grace. My restoration and deliverance in any area requires honesty in the inward parts, opened hands lifted in God’s direction, and trust in His ability to do whatever “surgery” is necessary. He is not only the Landscaper of my soul….He is the Great Physician who heals and restores!

Living out my faith and seeing internal changes is a life long process. He will reveal to me where I have gotten off track, where I have demanded my way over His will, and where I have messed up big time. But the revelation and the restoration will both be done in love and with success!

Father, I can become over whelmed with all that needs to be seen, acknowledged, and changed in me. It is only as I see my need to simply cooperate with You that my soul relaxes and my mind becomes at ease. I join You in Your work of restoration and healing. Amen.

A Heart and Face Lift

For then you will have your delight in the Almighty, and lift up your face to God. Job 22:26 NKJV

My affections and my attention have a powerful effect on the direction of my attitudes, actions, emotions, feelings, and motives. What I derive pleasure from and who I am constantly looking to will shape my entire day as well as my life. This verse is now my heart’s cry for I have tasted of the fruit that has come when anyone but God is my delight or my primary source of comfort, direction, and acceptance.

This morning I finally admitted the weariness of my own soul. I have spent the past couple of weeks nursing a wound of rejection. It has been tender and painful. I have mulled over the situation, sought godly counsel, shed many tears, claimed verses, fought the enemy of my soul, separated my feelings and perceptions from actual truth, acknowledged the ending of a significant relationship, and engulfed myself in a capsule of pain. But this morning I woke up desiring a new way to live in the midst of a new season of my life. I simply told God I was tired of holding on to all the hurt and ache. I was ready to let go of the spider web of emotions that had wrapped itself around every fiber of my being. I gave the entire “bundle” to Him. A huge weight has been lifted off my back as well as my heart because I know He graciously takes what I willingly give to Him. While the situation has not changed the effect it has on me did change.

I am now free to live out the principles of Job 22:26. When I am tempted to obsess over my loss I can now proclaim, “My delight is in You, O God! I lift up my face to You!” God’s word says the power of life and death are in the tongue. He has given me life-giving words to speak to Him. They are words full of healing, comfort, strength, and freedom. They are the key to unlock the chain that has been draped around my internal world. Just when I thought the darkness would be my only companion, His light has broken through and my path has suddenly burst forth with life! The enemy of my soul has lost big time and God has recaptured my heart!

I have noticed one huge thing. The longer I am on this journey and the farther I go, the more profound and deep the lessons are becoming. While the trials seem to be harder the victories are definitely sweeter. God is intent on wooing me to Himself and helping me to experience Him as my all in all. It will mean exposing the many hindrances that remain in the way. It will be a matter of releasing one thing after another to take hold of His hand. These cannot just be noble sounding words. They must be the life lines for my soul!

Father, You have waited all this time for me to give You what Your hands were ready to receive. Thank you for walking me through another valley of tears. I delight in You and I look to You. Amen.

When Others Hurt

I also could speak as you do, if your soul were in my soul’s place. I could heap up words against you, and shake my head at you. But I would strengthen you with my mouth, and the comfort of my lips would relieve your grief. Job 16:4,5 NKJV

When we experience difficulty, loss, or grief in any amount we long for someone to come along side us to strengthen and comfort us with their words. Often the ones to do that best are the ones who have been in our place of pain. They bear the scars, recall the wounds, and know the ache. They reach out to us in a way that very few can. It goes beyond mere sympathy or pity. They KNOW how we feel and actually enter into our situation emotionally. With them we feel safe to open up and verbalize what is going on inside us. We know they will not think less of us, label us, or brush us off. We know we will see in their eyes and hear in their words a kindred spirit. They will connect with us in a special way because our story will have traces of their own.

God has been faithful to bring such individuals into my life at just the right moments. While He assures me He will walk through all difficulties with me, He also lets me know He will bring others along side of me to listen, empathize, and speak words of healing to me. I can always tell that they have been where I am at. Their circumstances may have been different but the effects were the same. Because of what God has brought them through, they now walk with wisdom and love. They are willing to open their arms, hearts, and ears to others who hurt. May God bless them and increase their kind on the earth.

I want to join their ranks! Knowing how they have ministered to me, I now want to minister to others. It will require some things. It will mean being open to the needs of others. Allowing God to show me when someone is hurting and being willing to invest the time to hear their story, sense their pain, and speak words that will comfort and relieve. Letting them know I have been where they are at and assuring them they will be okay will validate their feelings and give them hope. I rest in the fact that my past experiences will keep my words from sounding hollow and heartless. Each time I am able to reach out to another individual who is hurting and sense that it is helping will be an opportunity for God to redeem my own story of loss or pain. I will see Him graciously giving me beauty for ashes! They in turn will someday do the same.

Father, thank you for each person who has reached out to me during the darkest times of my life. Their words and actions made a profound difference to me. Help me to now be that to others. Open my eyes, ears, and heart to the hurting, hopeless, and helpless. Amen.

Phrases to Experience and Embrace

The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon Me, because the LORD has anointed Me to preach good tidings to the poor, He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound. Isaiah 61:1 NKJV

Jesus is whispering these words to me this morning. I must see Him as the only qualified One to carry out each of these truths in my own life before I can direct others to Him for the same purpose. I use to read through this passage with little more than an appreciation for the poetic sound. The phrases meant very little to me. The intended hope that was housed within their words remained unknown to me. But that began to change several years ago. Slowly but surely He is causing the phrases to come alive to me. Each one is beginning to resonate in me as I experience their full impact. He is not necessarily taking them in order but He is individualizing them for me.


When I read “to proclaim liberty to the captives” I immediately recall His invitation for me to step away from a legalistic, performance based way of living my Christian life. I learned the truth and it really did set me free! Sure, there were fears and tears along the way but the desire for freedom and the assurance of it bringing me into a more intimate, personal relationship with God far outweighed the emotions. It birthed in me the passion to share with others how they too can be free. Now I see that phrase and it brings me joy because God has taken me from captivity to liberty!

A harder phrase to embrace is the healing of the brokenhearted. I see it as a message that is being birthed in me for the purpose of ministering to others. Right now the healing is a slow process that is hard to detect at times and the brokenheartedness is profound. It is painful and confusing in so many ways. Good sounding cliches and bumper-sticker phrases will not suffice. I praise God for the people, books, and music that are powerfully ministering to me. But I am acutely aware of God’s personal, direct involvement each step of the way. When His healing is complete I will be equipped to look hurting individuals in the eye and understand like never before the depth of their pain. As with a broken arm, it does not matter how a heart is broken….pain is pain. I look forward to the day my heart mending is complete and a message of hope and healing is mine to proclaim.

Father, it hurts. I rest in the fact that Your healing hands have not left me for one minute. My hope is in You. Amen.

When Seasons Have Ended

Now when they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord caught Philip away, so that the eunuch saw him no more; and he went on his way rejoicing. Acts 8:39 NKJV

Philip was involved in this eunuch’s life long enough to introduce him to the truths of Jesus Christ. They spent part of a day together as Philip explained a passage of scripture to him. Their meeting ended with this individual being baptized and then Philip was suddenly taken away. The eunuch saw him no more after that point. It was a brief encounter that changed his life! Here is the part of the story that grabs my attention: the man went on his way rejoicing!

I know what it is like to have an individual come into my life and teach me life changing truths about God. It has happened several times over the course of nearly 34 years. Each time I was affected greatly and the direction of my life was forever changed. There always seemed to be a certain pattern followed. God would prepare my heart for what I was about to learn, bring a person along to reveal truth, and I would take in the truth with a deep thirst! To this day, I love when that happens!

Here is the difficulty. Due to issues in my own life, it was often too easy to become enamored with the person God was using. I somehow would see them as necessary to my continued progress and growth. Unaware that their time in my life would be for a season, I would be crushed when it was time for me to move on without them. I wish I could say I readily released myself from them but that would be so far from the truth. It has often been a prying away of my fingers and a relearning of the necessity of it all.

God is gracious and very patient! I see Him awakening in me the realization to trust Him with this process. Under His care I am safe to experience relationships with the people He leads to me. There will be growth and at the right time (when He knows it is time) He will initiate the separation. He knows I’ll cry. He knows I will need to work through some issues. But ultimately He knows that I will resume a walk with Him that will have deepened. I thank Him for the ones He brings and I trust Him when their season in my life is over. When that happens, may I become like this eunuch who went on his way rejoicing!

Father, You know that I love the introductions and cringe at the goodbyes. You know when my heart is engaged and when it is broken. Through it all may I hold Your hand all the tighter. Amen.

Look and Live

But as for me, I would seek God, and to God I would commit my cause ~ Who does great things, and unsearchable, marvelous things without number. Job 5:8,9 NKJV

Where we look and what we focus on during the hardships of life is a primary factor in the amount, depth, and direction of our growth in Christ. If we dwell upon the hurts and disappointments of life we will clothe ourselves in garments of bitterness and live within walls of pain. But if we choose to do what Job did and keep our eyes fixed on God we will live out of His gifts of grace, strength, and endurance.

This does not mean the issues will disappear and the effects will not be felt. Job certainly knew how to express the excruciating parts of his life. He left no question that there were times he preferred death over life. Times that his particular suffering was unbearable and indescribable. He grieved his losses and felt the daily physical pain of his body. But today’s passage was an anchor for him. He had made up his mind to seek God, commit his life to God, and review the innumerable acts of God.

Let’s face it! There are times your brain and spirit need a rest from that which would overwhelm. If you do not purposefully choose to direct your thoughts toward God you will find yourself sinking lower and lower mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. God and His Word are the life lines EVERY time! This is not a denial of facts, a burying of issues, or a refusal to face life. It is a safe place to house those facts, interpret and work through the issues, and live life.

In the midst of whatever I may be going through I know these things. The enemy wants to hand me the meaning of everything and that meaning is full of distortions and lies. Now I can choose to listen to him and buy into his interpretations OR I can hold on to the God of grace and allow Him to grow me up in Christ through all of it. While wading through any painful waters of loss or disappointment I must choose to keep my thoughts on what would lift me up rather than what would pull me under. God has provided so many rich experiences and dear people in my life. My choice today is to focus on Him and His ways instead of the individual capsules of painful thoughts that would grow if left unchecked. There are times to do battle with the enemy and my own mindsets and there are times to lift up my eyes and hands to an incredible God who remains my help, strength, and life! I choose Him!!!!

Father, You see each thing that affects me. I am not alone in my pain or my pleasures. Clothe me in Your comfort and surround me with Your grace. I look to You and live! Amen.

The One Who Is At Work In Me

In simple humility, let our gardener, God, landscape you with the Word, making a salvation-garden of your life. James 1:21 The Message

From the first time I read this verse in The Message I fell in love with it! We live in a house that was once owned by a professional landscaper. For nearly ten years now we have enjoyed the beauty and benefits of his work. All the cultivating, planting, weeding, designing, and decorating by his hands left his mark on our yard and is a continual delight to our eyes as we watch the various flowers and plants come to life each spring.

When I stop to realize that God is landscaping my life with His Word I am in awe. Whether He is planting seeds for later growth, removing weeds of sin as I repent, rearranging the things and people in my life, or just adding special touches here and there, I am learning to trust His skillful hands and tender heart.

Sometimes the seeds He is planting are watered by the tears that have fallen due to loss or disappointment. No matter what He is doing, I have learned to trust Him for a beautiful outcome in the future. With each work He is doing, I am learning to see the necessity of it. Even if I don’t know the specific purpose I can at least look up to Him and agree with Him that it is needful. He is not One to do anything that ends up being wasted or insignificant. Like a treasured painting, each stroke of the brush is intentional and essential.

Each day I must choose whether or not I will entrust myself to the Potter’s hands and the Landscaper’s labor of love. While I know there will be tears at times, I also know there will be laughter. There will be the right blend of rain and sunshine. Sometimes I will walk amidst storm clouds and harsh winds and other times I will experience clear skies and absolute stillness. I leave the weather, the work, and the wonder up to Him who is the essence of wisdom and miracles.

This morning as I head to North Carolina I will review the past landscaping that He has done and the present landscaping that He is doing. It will be a discipline that will build my excitement and expectations for His future gardening. I am the recipient of the work of His own hands.

Father, I yield to Your touch. Nothing in my life is off limits to You. I know You have already planned out every detail of the landscaping to be done. Glorify Yourself through the entire process as I know the end result will far exceed my wildest imaginations. I love You! Amen.