I Still Miss Her

In March of 2000, I sat in the balcony at my church and took in the fact that I would soon be facing my first Mothers' Day without my mom.

She had been killed in a car accident after suffering a heart attack the previous February. I still remember the profound ache and extraordinary loss that enveloped me. Physically I felt like someone had taken a piece of barbed wire and shoved it into my chest...then proceeded to twist it. My mom who was so full of life. The one with whom I could laugh the hardest. The one I took after in so many ways. The one with whom I enjoyed Christian fellowship for the last 14 years of her life. The one who over came her alcoholism but struggled with depression. The one who loved me and cheered me on in life. The one who adored my children. Gone. Heaven held her and I couldn't get to her.

It was that day in March when the Lord gave me a poem which I would like to share with all of you. Written with my mom in mind, I now dedicate it to all of you who have lost your mothers or know someone who has....whether years ago or recently. While my personal pain and sorrow have subsided and good memories have replaced them, my heart goes out to any who face a difficult Mothers' Day this year. God bless you and may His presence be your comfort.

I Still Miss Her

It seems like only yesterday
I sent a Mother’s Day card away.
I didn’t think it would be the last,
I signed it with love and mailed it fast.
Now that she has gone away,
It doesn’t feel like Mother’s Day.
There are no more chances to send a card,
To ship some flowers, to make a call.
There’s no more thanking her for all she’s done.
No more visits,
No more fun.
I cannot hug her or kiss her cheek.
I cannot even share a laugh.
It all too quickly became the past.
I took each visit with her for granted.
I thought there’d always be more to come.
The camera lies still now
From her use and mine.
All the pictures have been taken,
All the memories have been made.
All the words have been spoken,
All the letters have been mailed.
The thing I miss the most of all
Has got to be her voice
Whether on the telephone or talking face to face.
I’d wish for one more conversation either here or at her place.
I know I’ll see her again some day,
We’ll share the sights of heaven.
We’ll talk, we’ll laugh, we’ll hug,
We’ll kiss….it’ll be Mother’s Day once more.
But until then I’ll be a mom for Mother’s Day instead of
Being a daughter.


Pam Shattuck
March, 2000

I Sure Miss You - Crabb Family
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oet_Avo79CQ

I welcome your thoughts.

When Comfort is Needed

Now when Job’s three friends heard of all this adversity that had come upon him, each one came from his own place—Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite. For they had made an appointment together to come and mourn with him, and to comfort him. Job 2:11 (New King James Version)

Job’s friends were not privy to the story behind Job’s story. They (along with Job) knew nothing of God’s conversation with Satan. How God extolled Job’s life and character and how Satan sought to use loss and pain to evoke Job to curse God. All Job and his friends could see was the result of Satan’s work. When life fell apart for Job at a proportion few of us could begin to fathom let alone relate with, they came for the purpose of being a help through grieving and comfort.

Although their intention was to bring comfort to Job it did not come about. They fell short of their goal. Why? Because they viewed Job and his situation with only one conclusion in mind….all this was happening because of sin in Job’s life. Nothing could be further from the truth. Their inability to see beyond their preconceived ideas hindered their ability to comfort. Have you ever been in their shoes? Wanting to comfort an individual in their time of sorrow, grief, or loss and not being able to? Looking to others to bring you comfort and coming up empty?

It is in our times of deepest hurt when we can become most teachable in the area of comfort. I look back on several years of deep grief and sorrow over the loss of a relationship and what comes to mind the most is the comfort God gave me through the heart and hands of friends. Although few could fully relate to or understand what I was going through they did some helpful things. They listened. In the very beginning of my darkest days they allowed me to talk about what had happened and how it was affecting me. In time, they gave me small doses of truth that I needed to hear, but the truth was said in love and with compassion. They directed me toward the God of all comfort, reminding me that God had not forsaken me or distanced Himself from my situation. They prayed for me and they prayed with me. They knew from whom my healing would eventually come. They let me know when they saw progress and change in me. They stayed with me. In all of that, they became my mentors in the art of comforting others.

Where am I today in light of this dark season of my life? For the most part, I am moving forward and only occasionally feel the ache. More importantly, I am now walking along side an individual who is in the midst of her own dark cave. What I received from others I now give to another.

Father, thank you for each person who listened, advised, and prayed for me. You used them in the same way You are now using me. I praise you for the comfort You give through others. Amen.

You Are My Hiding Place - Maranatha Singers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zej__yFPeK0

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Sheltered

You are My servant, I have chosen you and not rejected you. Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:9,10 (New American Standard Bible)

This is a verse God speaks over the lives of His children. I am touched and taken back by such extravagant declarations. I have found comfort in people when they have walked with me through valleys and trials. I drank in their reassurance of prayers and willingness to see me through situations. But as precious as that is, it doesn't compare with these words spoken by my heavenly Father.

As I read His words, they are so personal. I feel they were written just for me. They were meant to reassure me of His presence, love, and involvement in my life and my family's life. His pronouncement of who we are and what He will do arrest my very soul. We belong to Him and He takes care of His own.

I want His words to get into the deepest part of me. I want them to be neon lights against the blackness of circumstances. I want all worries and anxieties to bow before their powerful message. I want to hold them up as a shield against doubts, rejection, and the unknown.

I heard a song once that had a phrase that comforts me. "If it weren't for the storms I would never call You my Shelter." So true! I sense God's whispers to me as He quiets my heart with words of assurance and promise.

I wish I could paint. I picture a scene in my mind that I would love to transfer to a canvas. It is an outdoor scene. Jesus is holding a small child on His lap. His arms not only embrace her, they completely enfold her. All I can see is her face. Her eyes show trust instead of fear. Her head is pressed against His chest as she listens to His heartbeat. The sky is dark with storm clouds. The wind is apparent which tells of an approaching storm. A forest scene nearby reveals wolves crouched in a predator position. But she feels safe. His arms hold her, His voice comforts her, and His heartbeat invites her to abide under the shadow of his wings. If I could paint this scene I would entitle it "Sheltered."

Father, I hear Your voice, I feel Your arms, and I do feel safe. Amen.


Praise You In The Storm - Casting Crowns
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHdcyue0bSw

Fixing my eyes on Jesus, the Author and Finisher of my faith!

Held and Upheld

I have trodden the winepress alone, and from the peoples no one was with Me. I looked, but there was no one to help, and I wondered that there was no one to uphold; therefore My own arm brought salvation for Me. Isaiah 63:3,5 (New King James Version)

As I read these words, spoken by God, there were phrases that jumped out at me with a fresh awareness that I need never speak them. “No one was with Me, no one to help, no one to uphold.” On a human level, some might experience such isolation and loneliness, but not in relationship to God. Isaiah 41:10 brings all three concepts to light as God says to each of us who are in Christ, “Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you. Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.” Those are promises of companionship, assistance, and strength.

I use to think of upholding as simply carrying. I found it interesting to see it means to make strong, restore to strength, give strength, strengthen, sustain, encourage, make bold, make firm, make rigid, and make hard. No wonder any believer can voice the words of Paul and say, “I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me!” He literally infuses us with the strength necessary for any task, circumstance, situation, or experience.

To go one step further, it is dawning on me that even when we are not aware of God helping and upholding us, He is doing it. I can look back at difficult challenges in my life and now see that THAT is exactly what He was doing. In the midst of my fears, frustrations, and tears, He never left me to manage on my own. Even when I didn’t relax in His arms, they still held, helped, and upheld me. His grip never loosened. His eye never wondered, His attention never wavered, and His supply never ceased.

Tonight I am reflecting on His moments of upholding and helping me and I am seeing them with clearer vision and insight. No wonder He repeatedly tells us to review and remember. Our past experiences with Him are meant to encourage us in the present as well as the future. What He has done for us and been to us will continue.

So what is it you are needing to be reminded of this evening? God’s presence? God’s help? God’s enabling and strengthening? It may be a situation that has just come upon you or one that you have faced daily for years. It may be in the physical, emotional, or spiritual realm. Whatever it is, take the promises of Isaiah 41:10 as your banner of truth!

Father, You have always been there for me and will continue to be. I rest in Your arms and am renewed, refreshed, and restored. Amen.

Held - Natalie Grant
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2m1HZekCcc

Never On My Own

Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 (New American Standard Bible)

Oh how these words speak comfort to my soul! Last night, I found myself getting fearful and anxious about today because I knew human hands were not going to be sustaining me. I knew I would be needing to apply some recently learned truths throughout the day and there would be no person walking along side me as I did it. The thought itself made me uneasy and I asked God why it was that way. His answer was quick in coming. He helped me to see that being outside the voice and view of individuals whom I have come to trust leaves me feeling alone and on my own. He was right! Then He began to assure me that I was not alone or on my own at all. He helped me to realize the preciousness of His presence that would go with me and remain with me throughout my day.

As I step into today I am very aware that His eye and hand are on me. His ear is open to my cries for help. His Spirit indwells me and I am infused with His Word. His counsel will be available and trustworthy. He will faithfully supply my needs throughout today. It was all there yesterday and it will certainly be here today. Nothing has changed in regards to His strengthening, helping, and upholding me with His righteous right arm. As I see all of that I am enveloped with a peace that I have known little of in my life time.

Far too many times I have focused on the help and encouragement that came from people, when all the while the God of the Universe longed for me to see Him as my primary Source for every thing. Even what I was receiving from people was coming from Him. As I come to see the truth of that, I am realizing the absence of His vessels never removes the very things He gives me through them. From time to time, people will be there for me but once again I embrace the truth that He is my Shepherd, Guide, Helper, Defender, Stronghold, Protector, Counselor, Friend, Shield, Security, and constant Companion. I go into this day firmly held and abound with the joy of it all!

Father, You have never stepped away for even a moment. I have never been out of Your sight or care. Thank you for all the times that will be evident to me throughout today! Amen.

All I once held dear - Robin Mark
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SI6_4KxTg2k

Waste Places

Indeed, the LORD will comfort Zion; He will comfort all her waste places and her wilderness He will make like Eden, And her desert like the garden of the LORD; joy and gladness will be found in her, thanksgiving and sound of a melody. Isaiah 51:3 (New American Standard Bible)

There are times when life feels like a waste place, wilderness, and desert. Emotions are flat, a sense of hopelessness envelopes the soul, and one is filled with more questions than answers. It is a place I don’t like to be because it leaves me feeling like the bottom has fallen out and I begin to wonder if I am being thrown back to square one with God. Joy, gladness, thanksgiving, and music simply become the things I long for but seem far removed. Prayers are reduced to short phrases such as “Help me, God” and “Hold me, Father.” Reading the Bible seems lifeless. Attending church leaves you feeling more like an observer than a participant. You feel as though life is passing you by and you have suddenly been put in slow motion mode. Tears fall but you don’t always know why.

In the midst of the bleakness and darkness I have learned to do one thing….invite Jesus to be there with me. With Him I can freely share the confusing thoughts and insecurities. With Him I can be myself without the walls, masks, and false “okay” responses when asked how I am. He gives me permission to be silent when words elude me. He brings verses to mind when the light seems to have gone out on the path I walk. He gives me a song that will play over and over again in my mind as well as on my CD player. He gently reminds me that this too will pass.

When my mom was alive, she battled depression for most of her adult life. I well remember the empty stares and lifeless conversations. There are times I timidly ask God if that is what I am experiencing during the wilderness moments. For now, His answer is “No.” It is not depression but rather reminders that I live in a fallen world and possess a fallen nature. Expectations run high and disappointment runs deep but in the midst of it all He has promised to never leave me or forsake me. He encourages me to continue in the things I have learned and to keep looking to Him for my identity, security, and hiding place. It is a slow process at times but the promises of joy and gladness keep me hopeful.

Some will read these thoughts and see them as dark and foreboding. Others will relate and see themselves profoundly. With the latter ones I extend my hand in fellowship and understanding.

Father, be the Healer and Helper of our souls today. Help us sense Your presence and Your peace at this very moment. Amen.

Watching, Waiting, and Being Heard

Therefore, I will look unto the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation; my God will hear me. Micah 7:7 (King James Version)

My actions follow decisions I make in my mind. It is interesting how many phrases are found in scripture that begin with "I will." I will bless the Lord at all times. I will lift up mine eyes to the hills. To name just a couple.

In Micah 7:7 I see two "I wills" and one "God will." Micah had a predetermined plan for when the difficulties of life arose. Problems are inevitable in this life. We cannot escape pain, suffering, loss, or disappointment. Sorrows cannot always be avoided but we can choose ahead of time what our course of action and attitude will be when the storms of life do come crashing in on us.

First, we can look to God. Watch expectantly as the New American Standard Bible says. Look to Him for direction, provision, protection, security, encouragement, counsel, empowerment, intervention, and rest. He can give us the pioneer spirit to continue on in the adventures and valleys of life.

Then we can wait on Him. Scripture says, "They that wait on the Lord, shall renew their strength." The children of Israel fastened their eyes on the pillar of fire by night and pillar of cloud by day. They waited for movement in the sky before moving forward on the earth. Waiting on God is not wasted time or blind faith. It is wisely aligning myself with God's timetable and plan. The waiting time is productive when spent drawing close to Him, recounting His faithfulness in the past, praying without ceasing, and standing on the truths learned so far. As I wait on God I can rest assured He is either preparing me or preparing others for what lies ahead.

The most assuring words in this verse are the promise that my God will hear me. He not only hears my words but He understands my thoughts and motives as well. I find that His desire is for me to be honest with Him. Fears, doubts, discouragement, and confusion always super-size themselves when buried in the deep places of my heart. They tend to dissipate as I voice them out loud to God either verbally or in written form.

Waiting does not mean inactivity. It simply means to continue at the task at hand until He opens the way for movement forward. That is why I am so encouraged by my Bible ancestors and the precious examples they left for me to follow.

Father, how comforting to know that my words to You never fall on deaf hears, inattention, bored looks, or sighs of exasperation. Amen.

Each and Every Time

You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; You have put off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness. Psalm 30:11 (New King James Version)

Several years ago I asked God to show me His heart in Scripture. My desire was lined up with His and He graciously answered the prayer I had voiced to Him. What followed was that each time I read the Bible there was always found a living message for me! At first, this was such a change for me that I wasn’t sure it would continue to happen each day. I would approach His word with a certain amount of hesitancy and wonder if He would do the same thing for me as He had done the day before. Eventually the timidity gave way to anticipation as I had learned that He would infact be faithful to “show up” and give me practical truths from His Word.

God recently brought this scenario to mind as I ventured into a new area with Him. In the past, I had been use to taking difficulties and heart aches to people. Any amount of sadness or discomfort was reason enough to send an email or make a phone call. While comfort was usually forthcoming, God let me know this was not His intent for me as His child. His desire was that I learn to bring the “mourning and sackcloth” to Him, without which I would not experience Him as my Comforter and Counselor.

Accepting His invitation required trust on my part. He revealed to me that there was a certain amount of distrust I had toward Him and an unbelief that He could do for me what people had been doing. As He tenderly removed that obstacle of doubt, I became willing to take some moments of sadness to Him. Within a short time I found myself experiencing today’s verse. Dancing and gladness replaced sorrow and sadness! To say I was ecstatic is an understatement. I could not get over the way it actually worked! And yet just as in the case of approaching His Word, I found myself wondering if it would work EVERY time. Would God bring about the change for me every time? Absolutely!

He is unchangeable and completely reliable. I see that now. I no longer have to wonder if there is a limit to His availability or capability. He will never withdraw His offer of “Come unto Me.” His supply of comfort and power to transform my internal world will never run out. The temptation to make the calls or send the emails has been greatly reduced and I dance with joy because of it! Therefore, I will give thanks unto Him for ever. (Psalm 30:12)

Father, how You have longed for me to finally see that You could be trusted! May I never get over the wonder of it all. Amen.

A Love That Won't Walk Away

The LORD has appeared of old to me, saying: “Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore with loving kindness I have drawn you.” Jeremiah 31:3 (New King James Version)

Many (if not all of us) have known the sting of rejection. It is one thing to desire relationship with another person and never be given that opportunity. Try as you might, that person’s heart just never seems to open up to receive you. It is a whole other story when a person’s heart has opened up to you and embraced you as a friend. You feasted off the rich relationship and sensed the enjoyment went both ways. With them you felt safe, accepted, and celebrated. You were sure this was one of those relationships that was meant to last a lifetime. Some do! But some do not, as the person, for whatever reason, has a change of heart and you find yourself shut out of their life. The devastation alone is enough to send you reeling.

As painful as it is, I assure you, God brings much out of it. For me it has been a time of appreciating more fully the unchanging and unending love of God. Jeremiah’s words that God loves me with an everlasting love were broadened and deepened this morning when Isaiah expounded on them.

“For your Maker is your husband, the LORD of hosts is His name; and your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel; He is called the God of the whole earth. For the LORD has called you like a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit, like a youthful wife when you were refused,” Says the LORD, your Redeemer. “For this is like the waters of Noah to Me; for as I have sworn that the waters of Noah would no longer cover the earth, so have I sworn that I would not be angry with you, nor rebuke you. For the mountains shall depart and the hills be removed, but My kindness shall not depart from you, nor shall My covenant of peace be removed,” says the LORD, who has mercy on you. Isaiah 54:5-10 (New King James Version)

I am resting and reveling in the truth that it will never be said of my God that He had a change of heart toward me. I don’t have to go through my day wondering if He still feels the same today as He did yesterday. While people (myself included) have feet of clay, He is my Rock! His immutability is my security and stability. He will never disappoint me, devastate me, or depart from me. I fix my heart and my eyes on that truth and live in confidence and freedom because of it. While the ache of a lost relationship still exists, His words to me this morning serve as a necessary balm to my soul.

Father, the departure of one individual has led me to see Your heart of love in a richer way. In no other can I rely so heavily on as You. Amen.

The Birthplace of Comforting Others

Who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. 2 Corinthians 1:4 NIV

I have a close friend in Michigan who lives with a lot of physical pain. She has suffered with migraines since childhood, endured back and neck pain, and now her journey includes multiple sclerosis. In order to slow the progress of the MS, she must give herself a weekly shot that results in flu like symptoms for several days. She once told me she has never experienced a pain free day in her life. Her “good” days are when the pain is merely tolerable. She is one who is presently fettered by pain and she can minister to another individual who suffers with physical pain in ways that I cannot. She can also share the reality of God’s presence, strength, and comfort in the midst of it all. The compassion in her eyes and voice has been birthed through her own personal suffering.

Others are coming to mind this morning that have experienced heartbreak that will one day be used to comfort another. I think of a friend who lost twins early on in her pregnancy and now anticipates the birth of a daughter in September. I think of a number of friends who are walking a path of having daughters pregnant out of wedlock. I think of a dear friend who has experienced the break up of two marriages. I think of a couple in Michigan who were instrumental in my life as a teenager and now walk through days following brain surgery on him. I anticipate the day each of these sit across from a hurting individual and comfort them with the comfort they have received from the Father’s hand.

While my story would be different, God is desiring to do the same thing in me. I experienced this last night as I talked with a friend in the store. Her adult son is going through the difficulty of an ended relationship. I found myself deeply moved by his plight and very aware of all that must be going on in his internal world because I had walked a similar path in the last year. There were aspects of his heartache that I could easily identify and relate with because of my own experience. My ability to pray for him is deepened and broadened because of the memories I house as a result of my own circumstances. If given the opportunity, I could share with him the way God has walked me through the valley and graciously delivered me from the torment of it all.

Dear reader, the same is true for you! Ministry is birthed out of your own hurts, losses, disappointments, pain, and suffering. Know that one day you too will look into the eyes of a broken person and be used of God to comfort them in profound ways. I celebrate His work in us all!

Father, my tears will one day mingle with those of a hurting individual. I rejoice that nothing You have allowed in my life need ever be wasted. In Your wisdom, faithfulness, and love, continue to bring into my life that which would eventually comfort others. Amen.

When Others Hurt

I also could speak as you do, if your soul were in my soul’s place. I could heap up words against you, and shake my head at you. But I would strengthen you with my mouth, and the comfort of my lips would relieve your grief. Job 16:4,5 NKJV

When we experience difficulty, loss, or grief in any amount we long for someone to come along side us to strengthen and comfort us with their words. Often the ones to do that best are the ones who have been in our place of pain. They bear the scars, recall the wounds, and know the ache. They reach out to us in a way that very few can. It goes beyond mere sympathy or pity. They KNOW how we feel and actually enter into our situation emotionally. With them we feel safe to open up and verbalize what is going on inside us. We know they will not think less of us, label us, or brush us off. We know we will see in their eyes and hear in their words a kindred spirit. They will connect with us in a special way because our story will have traces of their own.

God has been faithful to bring such individuals into my life at just the right moments. While He assures me He will walk through all difficulties with me, He also lets me know He will bring others along side of me to listen, empathize, and speak words of healing to me. I can always tell that they have been where I am at. Their circumstances may have been different but the effects were the same. Because of what God has brought them through, they now walk with wisdom and love. They are willing to open their arms, hearts, and ears to others who hurt. May God bless them and increase their kind on the earth.

I want to join their ranks! Knowing how they have ministered to me, I now want to minister to others. It will require some things. It will mean being open to the needs of others. Allowing God to show me when someone is hurting and being willing to invest the time to hear their story, sense their pain, and speak words that will comfort and relieve. Letting them know I have been where they are at and assuring them they will be okay will validate their feelings and give them hope. I rest in the fact that my past experiences will keep my words from sounding hollow and heartless. Each time I am able to reach out to another individual who is hurting and sense that it is helping will be an opportunity for God to redeem my own story of loss or pain. I will see Him graciously giving me beauty for ashes! They in turn will someday do the same.

Father, thank you for each person who has reached out to me during the darkest times of my life. Their words and actions made a profound difference to me. Help me to now be that to others. Open my eyes, ears, and heart to the hurting, hopeless, and helpless. Amen.

Doing A New Thing

This is what the LORD says---He who made a way through the sea, a path through the mighty waters, “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland. Isaiah 43:16,18,19 NIV

I find instruction and comfort in this passage today. As I sense major changes in my life, my anchor of truth is knowing God’s hand is in it all. I know that the very things I am going through are either being caused by Him or allowed by Him and that He will not waste any of it. He will bring good, gold, and glory out of it all. He has shown me too much of His heart and character for me to draw any other conclusion. How can I not trust Him?

His instructions for me right now are to forget the former things and to stop dwelling on the past. He knows that if my mind cannot move on with life I will remain in a capsule of pain, disappointment, and sorrow. I will focus on the circumstances of my life instead of the Redeemer of those circumstances. I will stunt any growth, limit my own receptability to His teaching, and miss out on what He is doing. I have to believe that what He has in mind is far better than what He is removing from my life.

His promise and comfort to me is that He is doing a new thing in me. He knows what is necessary in order to bring it about. He says He is making a way in the desert. In order to make a way He is having to remove obstacles…the very things that would block progress. The hard part is experiencing the pain of His removal of what seems like good things. The things that at one time actually helped me to grow in my faith have fulfilled their purpose and would hinder growth if allowed to remain. It seems so final as this season of my life draws to a God-ordained close. That which brought security, safety, and encouragement will quickly become bondage and entrapment if I do not let go of it and take hold of Him.

When I see it as His work and His invitation to follow Him, I am better able take the first steps toward this new direction in my life. He has been gracious enough to prepare me for this time. He knew the day it would all hit me and He also knew I would respond with tears and trust. The tears were appropriate and the trust was necessary. Starting today, I do not want to miss anything He wants to teach me along the way. I sense His delight and excitement over what will soon unfold right in front of my eyes!

Father, I have grown so use to the way things have been. I bring all discomfort and disappointment to You. I reach for Your hand as I open my heart to You. Amen.

His Presence and His Words

And as they thus spoke, Jesus Himself stood in the midst of them and said unto them, “Peace be unto you.” Luke 24:36 21st Century KJV

Scripture is meant to be more than nice thoughts on a page. It is meant to house itself in our life! In every situation, every circumstance, every detail. There is not a thing that we face as God’s beloved child whereby Luke 24:36 is not able to be our experience. Wherever we are, whatever is happening, Jesus stands in our midst and voices these same words to us personally….”Peace be unto you.” He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He is a God who never changes. His heart of compassion that was so evident in Bible times is still beating for us today.

Some who are reading this devotional are facing unbelievable challenges today. It may be a health issue, a financial crisis, a tragic loss, extraordinary pain, or any number of things. My prayer for them is that they would profoundly sense the presence of Jesus in their midst. That their ears would detect the sound of His voice.

The peace He speaks of can truly be more powerfully felt than the tragedy at hand. It surpasses any peace that the world offers. It is a quietness and rest that accompanies a confidence, trust, and dependency on an almighty, loving Heavenly Father. He is not only the Shepherd of Psalm 23, He is OUR Shepherd. Tender, compassionate, and ever attentive. While many things may block our view of Him, NOTHING can rob us of His presence. He cannot be kept out or silenced when it comes to His child. He does not leave, He does not forsake, He does not abandon, He does not miss a thing. He is still a very present help in time of trouble.

Someone once said, “Every step in the journey we may take in the Lord’s own company.” And within that company we can allow His words in Isaiah 43:1,2 to be our comfort and strength. “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; you are Mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned.”

Along with all this let me assure you of a few things. Tears are appropriate and He invites us to cry on His shoulder. Fears are understandable and He longs for us to voice them to Him. Uncertainty is natural and He will listen as we confide in Him. There is no thought, feeling, or emotion that He is not aware of and willing to replace with His peace, confidence, and assurance. He will be the only One available 24/7. In the midst of it all, speak to Him, take Him at His word, hold on to the Scriptures He gives to you, lean on Him, and keep receiving all that He offers you. And when it all passes, you will know Him in a way you never knew before.

Father, my heart is heavy for those who are hurting. I take comfort in the fact that Your heart is touched by their hurts, losses, and troubles. May they sense Your presence and hear Your words to them today. Amen.

A Death Wish

But he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a juniper tree: and he requested for himself that he might die; and said, It is enough; now, O LORD, take away my life; for I am not better than my father. I Kings 19:4 KJV

I am writing today’s devotional with the awareness that some may be reading this who have in fact attempted to take their own lives through suicide. Others are reading it who, like Elijah, have prayed that God would just let them die. Knowing that God created us in His image with a strong desire to live, I am asking myself what it is that causes a person to desire death over life?

For Elijah it was fear. Jezebel had threatened his life and he ran for his life only to sit down and pray the Lord would let him die. For others it may be any number of issues that cause life to seem unbearable. Darkness sets in, reason leaves, confusion abounds, and there does not seem to be a way of escape or even a desire to find the escape.

I have known three distinct times in my life when I voiced such a prayer to God….or at least strongly wished He would just allow my life to end. One time was several years ago when my mother passed away. The ache of losing her engulfed me and there were times while driving I longed for semi trucks to just make their way over to my lane to end it all in one horrific accident. The other time was with the loss of a significant person in my life a year ago. Again, the enormous ache and pain left me with a death wish. I just wanted to stop hurting. Most recently it was during the darkest time of spiritual oppression that I have ever known. I felt isolated from every significant person in my life, questioned my own validity with God, doubted I should even write devotionals, and felt such darkness that again I despaired and wished God would just let me die. The fact that I am writing this devotional today reveals His ways are higher than my ways. Praise Him!

In the first two instances, time was a factor in regaining a desire to live. This most recent time was becoming acutely aware of how involved the enemy was in my life. David said in Psalm 55, “Because of the voice of the enemy…my heart is sore pained within me; and the terrors of death are fallen upon me.” I know now that the dark thoughts, multitude of confusion, and ultimate thought of death were his whispers. But God’s voice spoke louder. He listened the night my constant prayer was, “Jesus, I need You.” He held me when I lacked the strength to hold on to Him. And He revealed to me the true nature of my mindset. I stand in awe of His continual redeeming love!

Father, may I be filled with the fullness of You and live out the rest of my days in Your embrace! Amen.

Claiming or Proclaiming the Promise

Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning. Psalm 30:5 (NKJV)

For the believer, both aspects of this verse are theirs to experience in life. Weeping is a reality for each one of us and joy is the promise we know will come to pass. If I had the opportunity to visit with any one of you, I know that you would be able to share with me many nights of weeping that you have faced. Some of you may be experiencing them even as you read this devotional. If so, I give to you the promise of coming joy! Some of you are experiencing that joy right now and you are attesting to the truth of that promise. Which ever the case may be, David has an exceptional list in Psalm 30 that can be our proclamation of praise! We can say it with anticipation of the coming joy or with gratitude for the present reality of that joy. Will you join me as I express to God the truth of what He HAS done or the truth of what He WILL do? For we are either seeing what’s coming or experiencing it right now! Either way we glory in Him. With that in mind, let’s review the list.

I will extol You, O LORD, for You have lifted me up! You healed me! You brought my soul up out of the grave! You have kept me alive! You have made my mountain to stand strong! You have turned my mourning into dancing! You have put off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness! Therefore, I will give You thanks forever! Oh, how I would love to hear the stories behind those proclamations!

And for those of you who are still in your night of weeping, your list would be spoken in the future tense. I will extol You, O LORD, for You will lift me up! You will heal me! You will bring my soul up out of the grave! You will keep me alive! You will make my mountain to stand strong! You will turn my mourning into dancing! You will put off my sackcloth and clothe me with gladness! Therefore, even in the midst of my tears, I will give You thanks forever! How precious that some of you will express those thoughts with broken hearts and tear-filled eyes. May your joy be soon forthcoming!

Like you, I have known the weeping and the joy! In the midst of both He is worthy to be praised and I trust Him still.

Father, You have walked with me through sorrow and danced with me in gladness. I desire no other Partner but You! Amen.

Our Hiding Place

But Jonathan Saul’s son delighted much in David: and Jonathan told David, saying, Saul my father seeketh to kill thee: now therefore, I pray thee, take heed to thyself until the morning, and abide in a secret place, and hide thyself. I Samuel 19:2 KJV

Where do you resort to when your world is turned upside down? Maybe like David, you are experiencing a devastating change in a close relationship. Maybe you have been handed a medical diagnosis that felt more like a death sentence. Maybe everything that is dear to you has been suddenly ripped out of your life. Whatever the case may be, Jonathan’s words to David are meant for you as well….abide in a secret place and hide thyself.

David eventually penned words that revealed where he learned to safely abide. Psalm 91:1 says, “He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.” Jesus urges us to abide in Him and in His love.

Abiding has the idea of making a certain place your abode. A place to sit, rest, and dwell. It is the equivalent of a spiritual Calgon commercial! Although we may not be able to physically remove ourselves from a certain place or situation, our spirit can always choose to resort to a secret place under the shadow of the Almighty. To draw in close enough to God that His presence, peace, and person overshadows you and all that is affecting your world.

Throughout Scripture God gives us visuals of being that close to Himself. A mother hen gathering her chicks under her wings. An eagle hovering over her young. Other pictures come to mind of this tender aspect of God. A mother or grandmother cradling an infant in their arms. A person of strength and compassion embracing and holding a grieving friend. The hushed tones, gentle touch, and caring eyes all directed toward a person in need.

But God is also a fortress, stronghold, shelter, and bulwark. A place that is completely safe and unable to be disturbed. One that keeps all storms at bay and hinders them from completely destroying our internal world.

Strength and tenderness! Two aspects of our God who desires for us to seek refuge and comfort in Him.

Father, may my place of hiding and abiding always be in You! Amen.

What It Means to Stay

The Lord was my stay. 2 Samuel 22:19b KJV

Let him trust in the name of the LORD, and stay upon his God. Isaiah 50:10b KJV

We often hear words but don’t fully grasp their meaning or significance. One thing I have come to appreciate about God’s Word is its richness and depth. When I read a verse and understand where it applies to my life, situation, and circumstances, it infuses within me a confidence to move forward with renewed strength, joy, and resolve. Such is the case with the word ‘stay.’

When God is referred to as my stay, it means He is my support. He is the One who holds me up and gives me strength. He is the One who keeps me on course and establishes my way. How assuring and securing it is to realize God is the One who will protect, hold, bear, carry, prop, sustain, maintain, shore up, keep up, back, provide for, confirm, and affirm me. No wonder David often referred to Him as his rock, strong hold, shelter, and tower! He is our stability in a world that can seem like anything but stable.

Once we see God as our stay, we can heed the words of Isaiah when he says to stay upon God. Who better to rely upon, lean on, lie in, rest upon, take hold of, and stand fast in? Like a trusting child in the arms of a loving parent, God woos me into a restful relationship with Himself. He knows that any relationships I look to for security will leave me wanting. He knows that all the external things of life that I would attempt to draw strength and support from would fail. He loves me too much to allow anything or anyone to take His place or give me what He offers.

So when I am faced with disappointment, discouragement, confusion, uncertainty, or doubt He invites me to stay on Him. When there is a vagueness to my journey, valleys to walk through, or trials to endure He welcomes me to stay on Him. And even in the times when things go my way, joys abound, and life feels good He still whispers, “Stay on Me.” That is why the song writer so eloquently said, “Stayed upon Jehovah, hearts are fully blessed. Finding as He promised, perfect peace and rest.”

Father, I rest in You because You are my stay! No one else can hold me, assure me, or comfort me like You can. Thank you for offering me the shadow of Your wings to abide under. Amen.

A Daily Promise

I will carry you; and I will bear you and I will deliver you. Isaiah 46:4b NASB

It occurred to me this morning that while Jesus was on this earth, He was physically carried in three different ways by people. For nine months, He was carried in Mary’s womb. Housed in the very place He had created in her. For a number of years, He was carried in Mary’s arms as an infant and small child. And for a few hours, He was carried from the cross to the tomb. Think of it! The Creator God placed upon Himself the limitations that necessitated Him to be carried by His own creation.

Countless are the times this same God carries us! At the times of loss, sorrow, loneliness, and tears, it is God Himself who carries us, moves us along, and supports us. He holds us and upholds us. He is tender. He is compassionate. He is careful.

I found it interesting to see that the word ‘carried’ actually means to be gravid…..pregnant! It is the picture of a mother’s womb. A place of safety and enclosure. It is a place that is close to the heart. The picture takes on more depth as I consider the fact that God is my shelter, refuge, and strong tower. Nothing gets to me without first passing through Him.

If ever we needed the assurance that we are going to make it through something, Isaiah 46:4 is our foundational truth to cling to. God promises to carry us, bear us, and deliver us. We must remember this when we face any storm, trial, disappointment, loss, anguish, or set back. Whether we picture ourselves being carried in God’s arms or in His womb, we are secure. He is moving us along and supporting us the entire way.

The ultimate deliverance is Heaven, but there are innumerable times of deliverance we desire throughout our life. Often are the times we long to be delivered from circumstances, habits, strongholds, danger, fears, pain, generational bents, and difficulties. Be assured that while we wait for such deliverance, God Himself is carrying us and caring for us! At NO time are we left to fend for ourselves.

Father, You hold me securely in Your heart, arms, and womb. I am safe in the shadow of Your wings and nestled in the crook of Your neck. May I hear your hushed tones and whispers of assurance all along the way. Amen.

An Extravagant Offer

For just as the sufferings of Christ are ours in abundance, so also our comfort is abundant through Christ. 2 Corinthians 1:5 NASB

None of us would deny that we live in a fallen world. The effects of every day life can be daunting. Each one of us face some amount of loneliness, hurt, disappointment, pain, heartache, loss, rejection, and trouble. While my list certainly cannot compare to the things the Apostle Paul went through (beatings, imprisonment, stoning, shipwreck, cruelties), I know that if I am living and breathing I will suffer in one way or another. Life will get uncomfortable, people will let me down, certain needs and desires will go unmet, and the enemy will attack. There is an abundance of things I would rather not have in my life.

Yet, how much I need to remember the ‘so also’ of today’s verse. There is an abundance of suffering but it is matched by an abundance of comfort from my Savior! Whatever I bring to Him, He offers an equal amount or more of His comfort. No store on earth has such a grand return policy! What does this mean in my practical, every day life?

I bring my sorrows to Him and He gives me joy. I bring my loneliness to Him and He gives me His presence. I bring my emptiness to Him and He fills me. I bring my weaknesses to Him and He strengthens me. I bring my questions to Him and He gives me answers. For my wounds He has balm. For my strongholds He has freedom. For my sin He has forgiveness. For my dark moments He has light. For my losses and suffering He has comfort. Whatever the size of my trouble, situation, experience, or problem He will lavish me with the opposite.

Some who read this are going through the death of a loved one. Some are racked with physical pain. Some are struggling financially. Some are going through a divorce. Some are losing a friend. Some are depressed. No matter the circumstance that envelopes their life, this verse is meant for them today! God offers an abundance of comfort for their abundance of suffering. He is not stingy with it….He is extravagant! May each one of us open ourselves up to receive all that He desires to give!

Father, it has taken a long time for me to see this aspect of You. I spent decades seeking the comfort of others when all the while You stood ready to comfort me in deep ways. Dry my tears, hold my hand, and keep giving me the assurance of Your presence. With You I am not alone! Amen.

Stepping Into the Storm

When He got into the boat, His disciples followed Him. And behold, there arose a great storm on the sea. Matthew 8:23,24

The dynamics of their day changed when the disciples climbed into a boat with Jesus. Following Him led to a storm in their life and I am being reminded this morning that many times it is no different for us in this present age. As believers we have a desire within us to know God on a personal, intimate level. For some that desire has been buried under years of religious activity, going along with the crowd, and making their outward life appear to be just right. But the desire is still there. It is that ache inside them that whispers to them when they are finally alone with their own thoughts. Something is telling them there has got to be more to the Christian life and they long to know what it is.

I use to have a pretty “safe” way to live my Christian life. It boiled down to a neat system of behavior. Go to church, get involved, keep the rules, do what was expected of me, keep issues at the surface, never question, blend in to look and sound like everyone else, stay away from anything or anyone that didn’t agree with what I believed, and at all costs don’t make waves! While it was a safe box to live in it brought no internal satisfaction, healing, direction, or connection to God on a personal level. God was not the One I felt comfortable talking to, His Word was not something I opened on a daily or even weekly basis, and an incredible sense of emptiness, loneliness, and condemnation engulfed me. That was the shore of my existence for decades. Could people tell it on the outside? No! But my internal world mocked me.

The day I climbed into my own “boat” with Jesus was profound. All was bright and sunny for the most part. But the storm eventually came and I had to learn what it means to trust Jesus no matter what the circumstances of my life looked like. While it would appear my life has come unraveled my soul finally knows what it is like to be in daily relationship with my heavenly Father. So let the winds blow, let the waves cover me, let the rains descend! I have no intention on going back to the shores of comfort. I would rather be alone with Jesus in the midst of a storm than be surrounded by multitudes in my own emptiness.

Father, You see every storm that approaches. Your presence, Your Words, and Your voice sustain me! Amen.