Freedom of Silence

He was oppressed and He was afflicted, yet He did not open His mouth; like a lamb that is led to slaughter, and like a sheep that is silent before its shearers, so He did not open His mouth. Isaiah 53:7 (New American Standard Bible)

Verbal restraint is difficult. In the moments I most want to defend myself, express my hurt, voice my opinion, announce unfairness, and tell my side of the story I am so far from the example Jesus set forth. The amazing thing is how small the offenses against me are compared to what He faced.

Surely the physical abuse hurt, the verbal insults stung, the ridicule ran deep, yet He remained silent. The Bible says a soft answer turns away wrath. How much more powerful is silence!

I realize once again the necessity of God doing a work in me. He is showing me yet another area in my life that needs His touch. I can do all things through Christ and without Him I can do nothing. Remaining silent amidst hurts, injustices, and insults is impossible in my flesh but with God ALL things are possible.

I am reminded that as a Christian I have God’s Spirit living in me. Galatians lists the fruit (result) of the Spirit and within that list I read the word self-control. James spells out the difficulty we have controlling our tongues.

So I ask myself this question, “Where am I struggling most at opening NOT my mouth?” While swearing or cursing may not pose problems for me I have a long list that does. How well am I at controlling the urge to defend myself, gossip, lie, be humorous at someone else’s expense, complain, respond in anger, speak negatively, interrupt others, brag, or belittle others?

Like Paul, I find in my flesh a law. In this case, I find in my mouth a law. I end up saying the things I shouldn’t say and not saying the things I should say. While there are times I should keep silent, there are plenty of times I should speak up. Times like sharing the Gospel, encouraging others, defending others, and giving honest reports.

If there is one thing I have learned it is this…God exposes areas that need changing not to condemn me but to show me where He desires to work. May I cooperate with Him.

Father, Jesus knew when to speak up and when to remain silent. Help me to be like Him. Amen.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_-flIpeAsc

To Whom Honor is Due

Render to all men their dues. [Pay] taxes to whom taxes are due, revenue to whom revenue is due, respect to whom respect is due, and honor to whom honor is due. Romans 13:7 (Amplified Bible)

There are times when God makes His way down to the bedrock of my soul in order to help me see the most precious truths. That is where His hand has been felt in the past number of months. I wanted quick results and resolutions to difficulties but God wanted to bring forth gold. He has dug below the surface with depth in mind. When I wanted things over, He was just getting started. Each time I “learned” a lesson and thought I was coming out of the darkest of caves, He let me know I had only received a small dose of truth which was necessary in order to take in the next dose.

This morning as I once again battled thoughts regarding a lost relationship I was confronted with two necessary truths. It seems that lately it is not difficult to understand the points God is making and wanting me to grasp. As I found myself dwelling on the thought that a former mentor was thinking the worst of me, I had to face two things. First, I don’t really know her heart and my perceptions are actually judgments I am making. Second, I am actually thinking the worst of her and placing her in the most negative of lights by assuming she is thinking only negative thoughts with regards to me.

I have come to the place that when I see a problem in my own heart I know it is time to ask God for some direction and help. My question to Him was, “How do I stop thinking and feeling this way?” His answer came in today’s verse, “Give honor to whom honor is due.” He began to encourage me to honor this woman for the many things I learned through her and the huge impact she had on my life. Honor the way He used her to teach me valuable life lessons and biblical truth. Honor what He did through her by living out the very things she taught me. Honor her for being His daughter and my sister in Christ. Honor the good memories that abound knowing that for a season she helped me take many first steps in this journey that began over four years ago. Honor each gift she instilled in me and what was birthed out of those gifts. Honor her commitment to mentor me and then her wisdom to step away. Honor the God who has had His hand in all of it!

My day has been spent honoring her and God in those ways and many others. What I am finding is that the thoughts that have tormented me and hung on me for so long have begun to lose their grip. I am also seeing many other people from my past who need to be honored in my mind and heart as well. God never ceases to amaze me!

Father, I have spent a year dishonoring your servant and your work in me. Forgive me for the things I have said and thought. Help me to now practice what You have lovingly shown me. Amen.

The Wind Beneath My Wings (Dedicated to my former mentor and all those I honor)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FryTIiUqU7I&feature=related

In the Art Gallery of My Mind

But do not listen to Hezekiah when he misleads you, saying, "The LORD will deliver us." Has any one of the gods of the nations delivered his land from the hand of the king of Assyria? Where are the gods of Hamath and Arpad? Where are the gods of Sepharvaim, Hena and Ivvah? Have they delivered Samaria from my hand? 'Who among all the gods of the lands have delivered their land from my hand, that the LORD should deliver Jerusalem from my hand?'" 2 Kings 18:32-35 (New American Standard Bible)

Words can be used to paint factual or fictional pictures in our mind! The king of Assyria sent messengers to the children of Israel with a seemingly sure picture of defeat. Upon the walls of their imaginations they painted a scene with the use of Israel’s fears and Assyria’s past defeats of other nations. What they said sounded plausible but it never came about. Israel trusted God and the Assyrians mocked God and in the end their carefully crafted depiction dissolved.

The enemy of our soul uses the same strategy as the Assyrians. He loves nothing more than to paint distorted pictures of situations with hopes we will embrace his lies. For the past two days I found myself viewing his “art gallery” that he was more than happy to display. It started with an invitation by a friend to listen to the archives of a radio program she felt would be helpful for me. The subject was on relationships and after reading the excerpt of the program’s topic I was suddenly filled with a lot of negative emotions. What came to the surface was shame and condemnation over a past relationship issue wherein I still housed some wrong thoughts. Not only could I not listen to the program, I also couldn’t shake the feelings that enveloped me. Today, I began looking at the negative thoughts and feelings and realized they were sure signs of the enemy’s presence and tactics. With that realization came some truth I was ready to receive from God.

I had allowed the enemy to paint distorted pictures of a situation and what he was using for his paints was blood from my own internal wounds! But I knew it didn’t have to continue to be like that. What I needed to do was give my wounds to God and allow Him to paint a truthful picture for me. What a difference!

I have said it before and I will say it again, “I am a visual person and I need very visual examples to help me learn!” What God showed me today will stick with me and help me to walk in victory through His precious art galleries of my mind.

Father, the enemy has many tools and tactics, but only You have the truth! I now look to You for the interpretation and portrayal of all the events in my life. I praise You! Amen.

open the eyes of my heart lord
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wutmEjdbedE&feature=related

Already At Hand

"Behold, I will stand before you there on the rock at Horeb; and you shall strike the rock, and water will come out of it, that the people may drink." And Moses did so in the sight of the elders of Israel. Exodus 17:6 (New American Standard Bible)

As I think back on the many miracles of provision recorded in Scripture a truth is coming home to me. Amy Carmichael said it well when she wrote, “Have you ever been strengthened to win a victory perhaps over some inward foe, and have you suddenly found yourself tired out and sore athirst? Quite close, just where you are, there is water. Call, and the Lord will cause it to flow for you; some word of life will come to mind, some line of a hymn, some thought of peace, and your spirit will come again and you will be revived.”

When the children of Israel cried out because of thirst, the rock which brought forth water was close at hand. When thousands were fed from multiplied bread and fish, the boy’s lunch was already in their midst. When the widow set out to prepare a last meal for her and her son during a famine, the meal and oil were already in her home. When Abraham raised his hand to slay his only son, Isaac, the ram was already in the thicket near by. When Hagar placed her son Ishmael under a bush to die of thirst, the well of water was within sight. In these cases and many more, the supply God would use was right there for each individual. None of them could imagine that would be the way God would choose to meet their needs. They became the recipients of His sovereign generosity and compassion without even knowing what God would do or how God would do it.

God is showing me today that the same is to be true in my own life. It is imperative that I cry out to Him for my needs and then watch as He faithfully meets those needs. What He did in the past may not be what He does now but He will do something! I must leave the decision up to Him as to what or who He will use to meet my needs each time they arise. His options are not limited and neither is His ability.

Already this morning I opened His Word after letting Him know I needed refreshment from Him. I was feeling internally shaky and wanted Him to bring about a sense of peace and well being. His Word did that but it was accompanied by the reminder to no longer look to the old ways of satisfaction and help. Allowing Him to determine the supplying of my needs is to be my daily experience. What a God!

Father, looking to You never fails to put me in awe. You are the God who sees me and in that I rest, revel, and rejoice! Amen.

El Shaddai - Amy Grant
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=la0bQAJTelU&feature=related

No Comparison

For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8,9 (New American Standard Bible)

There are times when my inabilities are so apparent to me. There are many things I cannot do or even begin to grasp. There are things I see in others that make me marvel. I have such respect for people who can speak several languages fluently, whiz through subjects like calculus, physics, and anything that ends with “ology” or “ometry,” or do any number of things that take a lot of brain activity. Some people who have mastered such things can derive pleasure in feeling superior to the rest of us and we might have a tendency to feel inferior next to them.

That is not the case with God’s proclamations regarding His ways and thoughts being far above our own. First of all, He makes these claims because they are true. He is omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent. So naturally His ways and thoughts ARE far above our own.
But He also states these truths to assure us that we can trust Him. He knows more than we know and can do more than we can do. What better One to entrust with our life, path, and future than almighty God Himself? Who better to ask counsel of, seek direction from, and follow closely than our heavenly Father? He knows the beginning from the end, sees the whole picture, and will always accomplish His purposes.

I think of the people I would trust with abandon in various situations. If trapped in a burning building I would trust a fireman. If engaged in battle I would trust a soldier. If shipwrecked on an island I would trust the captain of a ship. If entering surgery I would trust the doctor. If faced with any number of difficult situations I would trust someone with experience, knowledge, and capability.

Therefore, when it comes to every area of my life, God is the ultimate Source of every need, question, and concern. How comforting to know that I can rest in the fact that His ways are higher than my own and so are his thoughts. As I voice that out loud I am strengthened, comforted, and directed in magnificent ways.

Father, I stand in awe of Your superiority to me and sensitivity to me. With You I have all I need. Amen.

INDESCRIBABLE - Chris Tomlin
http://youtube.com/watch?v=VmTxZAl7ceU&feature=related

He Understands Me

Great is our Lord and abundant in strength; His understanding is infinite. Psalm 147:5 (New American Standard Bible)

There are times when I read a portion of Scripture and all of a sudden something will stand out that I never saw before. Psalm 147 gives an eloquent portrayal of God’s strength and knowledge but today it became personal for me. God, who is all knowing, helped me to see that He understands me thoroughly. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve known that He knows me….He even knows the number of hairs on my head. He knows my past and my future. He knows my likes and dislikes. He knows my strengths and weaknesses. He knows my failures and successes. I know all that but today I was drawn toward the fact that He not only knows me and knows all about me, but he UNDERSTANDS me! He understands why I do the things I do and why I feel the way I feel. He understands my thought patterns and mind sets. He understands what is good for me and what is harmful to me. Considering I don’t always understand myself and the people in my life don’t completely understand me, this truth is huge for me!

One of the things I like about God is that He is willing to show me how much He understands me. Let me illustrate. Recently I have wondered why I often hesitate to admit to those closest to me when I am struggling in some way. People may ask me if I am okay or if something is wrong and I will give a shallow answer in hopes of diverting their attention. Even the few who are willing to listen find that I am more apt to share things with them AFTER the struggle is over. While I knew some reasons for this, God helped me to see something I was missing.

My make-up is such that if I begin to share my problems with people I will find myself needing to talk to them about EVERY problem. Those who help me climb out of the pits I find myself in will eventually become the “saviors” I am looking for. They will easily become my comforters, counselors, and guides in place of God. That is idolatry and I am so prone to it. It is that understanding of me that God has! Therefore, He has given me a built in guard rail that sees some wisdom and safety in choosing to share the difficulties with others AFTER He has helped me walk through them. While there will still be times I confide to a few when the battle is raging, I hope it becomes the exception and not the rule. I will be the first admit I don’t know if this but self protection or a true step toward freedom. So I will once again look to my Father for the answer, because He really does understand me.

Father, I rest in Your understanding of me. I trust You to show me if I am mistaken in this area. I long for the balance between You and the precious people You continue to bring across my path. Help me to walk by faith in You and Your ways. Amen.

He Knows My Name by Maranatha Singers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXsiWoyjw60

What If?

When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul. Psalm 94:19 (New American Standard Bible)

Anxious, disquieting, worrying, disturbing, alarming, unsettling, troubling, distressing thoughts. How easily they can multiply within us. How we long for freedom but find ourselves giving in to the mental mazes. It seems that for a while all is well and the battle becomes quiet. Then out of “no where” the thoughts begin to creep in and that familiar feeling of dread takes hold.

When it happened earlier this evening God asked me a question in my spirit that I have not been able to avoid, escape, or dismiss. The question was this, “What if you handled this differently than you are accustomed to handling it and you ruled your emotions and thoughts instead of allowing them to rule you?” In other words, what if I took the thoughts captive instead of letting them take me captive? Not only did the question take me by surprise but I found myself realizing I actually had a choice in the matter. I also realized the outcomes I am use to experiencing do not have to be the status quo from this point forward.

I know myself and I know the patterns I tend to follow. I can attest to the fact that the mind road I so easily travel does not work well or in my favor. God is letting me know it doesn’t have to continue to be like that. Instead, I can reject the urge to wallow in the muck and mire of my psyche. I do not have to yield to the temptation to get down, feel sorry for myself, house suspicions against people, allow my thoughts to run rampant, or allow them to lead me into a pit of any size or depth. My thoughts are only as predominant and powerful as I make them. At my choosing, they can be weakened and made ineffective. What I do not dwell on will not have a home in me!

So yes! What if I become more discerning about my thoughts? What if I stopped the cycle that has been played out far too many times? What if I acted and reacted differently? None of this comes naturally for me but God is assuring me it can become a way of life for me. The result would be freedom and joy….of that I am confident. It would also mean delight for my soul. And so I am asking myself, “What if I just did it?” He will help…I know He will.

I know too that even though the choice is mine, the ability and power comes from God. He is the One who says I am being transformed by the renewing of my mind but even that comes from Him, for He is working in me that which He is willing to do with me.

Father, keep showing me how to live victorious in You. Amen.

I Love You Lord - The Acappella Company
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a6QE2k1FepQ&feature=related