When It is Given to Another

Go up to the top of Pisgah, and lift your eyes toward the west, the north, the south, and the east; behold it with your eyes, for you shall not cross over this Jordan. But command Joshua, and encourage him and strengthen him; for he shall go over before this people, and he shall cause them to inherit the land which you will see. Deuteronomy 3:27, 28 (New King James Version)

In today’s passage, not only do we witness God’s final answer to Moses’ desire to enter the Promised land with the nation of Israel, but we also hear His instructions as to how he is to interact with the one who is to take his place as the next leader of God’s people. He is given a view of the land but denied entry due to a disobedient act on his part. That had to have stung. Yet, I marvel at what God instructs him to do with regards to Joshua….command him, encourage him, strengthen him. Further reading reveals that Moses did just that! He whole heartedly supported the one who would be privileged to do what he would not be allowed to do.

I compare this scenario to that of King Saul when he knew that David was to be the next king of Israel. Jealousy and hate ruled Saul’s heart and actions. Rather than command, encourage, and strengthen, he sought to kill him! Both men lost their desired positions and opportunities due to their own actions and yet the way they responded to the consequences and their “replacements” were polar worlds apart.

Although Moses’ and Saul’s situation had to do with consequences, I am asking myself which scenario would more closely resemble my life if someone were given an opportunity I wanted for myself? In all honesty, without the grace and work of God in my life, I am more like Saul than Moses (minus the intent to murder). My flesh gets riled when what I want is withheld from me and “handed” to another person….even a friend. When disappointment marks my path, I don’t do well with “rejoicing with those who rejoice.”

Many have been the times I have had to take an honest look at my heart, admit the truth to God, and ask for His grace to overcome the dictates of my flesh. That is just the first step though. It takes additional grace from Him to then become the encourager and strengthener of the one who is chosen by Him to carry out that which I long to do. To partner with them rather than stand opposed to them or in competition with them. It is part of learning to walk on a solid foundation of trust in the heart of my Father, for He knows the plans He has for me and others ….plans to prosper rather than harm!

Father, when I am disappointed may it never be in You! Help me to come to the place of receiving “No” from You as easily as I receive “Yes.” Help me to interact with others in a way that pleases and honors You. Amen.

Do I Trust You - Twila Paris
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSopilUouw8

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Walks in the Wilderness

For the Lord your God has blessed you in all the work of your hand. He knows your walking through this great wilderness. These forty years the Lord your God has been with you; you have lacked nothing. Deuteronomy 2:7 (Amplified Bible)

God’s words to Israel are His words to me as well. What He says He has done and is doing is exactly what He has done and is doing. I don’t like the times when my journey entails walks in the wilderness. Times when things are not exciting and all seems to be at a stand still. I grow uncomfortable with what seems like routine and sameness. Yet I find reassurance in knowing that at those times, God blesses my work, knows my walk, accompanies me, and supplies my every need. Of all those promises, the one that touches me most deeply this morning is His knowledge of my walk.

He knows what I am up against. He knows the battles that lie ahead as well as the ones in my head. He knows the self doubt, the questions, the uncertainties, the worries, and the insecurities. He also knows the growth, the victories, the aha moments, and the things that will move me to tears as well as laughter. He knows who will cross my path. He knows the losses and gains, the lessons learned and relearned, the disappointments and delights, as well as the length of stay. He knows what is needed to sustain and refresh me. Every aspect of the forty years the children of Israel spent in their great wilderness was known and attended to by God. In the same way, every aspect of my wilderness experience is known and attended to by God.

Lest I get the idea that wilderness times are dull and uneventful, I must think upon those times when the children of Israel witnessed miracles and took in important life lessons. There were battles fought and won IN the wilderness. There was the supplying of needs IN the wilderness. There was personal guidance by day and night IN the wilderness. There was confrontation for sin IN the wilderness. There was God’s voice and presence IN the wilderness. It was not just a time of wandering but rather a time of interaction with God and one another.

I don’t want to miss what God has for me at this time in my life. I don’t want to think of it as simply waiting on the shelf! I want to come out different than when I entered. In order for that to happen there will need to be changes in my perspective, my passion, my mindset, and my heart. Each day affords me the opportunities to learn and grow. May I take those opportunities with fervor and zeal!

Father, my view of being in the wilderness is changing. Help me to see it as a unique time rather than a time I at which I cringe. May today be filled with You! Amen.

With All I Am - Hillsong
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FMrAafe7Mns&feature=PlayList&p=EAE85BEDB2E61503&index=0&playnext=1

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

To Serve or Be Served

Just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many. Matthew 20:28 (New American Standard Bible)

In the past week, I have pondered this verse many times. Jesus’ characteristic of looking to serve rather than be served does not come to me naturally. Left on my own, I fall short of living my life with others in mind. When I enter a room I tend to look to people to encourage me, make me feel welcome, show me love, and give me attention, rather than vice versa. My expectations of them are high and the disappointment comes often when those expectations are not met. Seeing this aspect in me is not easy or comfortable and neither is admitting it to others. Yet, I am convinced I do not stand alone. I am convinced others struggle with “me-ism” as much as I do…..focused more on self than on others. I am also convinced I am not alone in my desire to live my life in a different way.

I asked God to show me what I can start doing to bring about change. He quickly brought today’s verse to mind then He proceeded to give me practical ways to carry it out. His instructions to me? When I am with people, start looking for ways to make them feel welcome and wanted with good eye contact, smiles, listening when they talk, showing interest in them, drawing them into the conversations. In other words, start doing for others what I have had done for me in the past. Those same things that touch my heart and make me feel loved are the things I must now demonstrate to others.

If these are done solely in my own strength they will not last. But if they are done as a result of my daily walk with God, they will flourish. If they are done with the help of His Spirit working in me, they will bear fruit. If they are done by His ability coming through me, they will make a difference.

As I come to God and ask Him to show me things I can begin doing, I am acutely aware of my need for a changed heart. He is the true heart changer and I rejoice that with my cooperation that change will take place. Change of desires, change of expectations, change of what and who I am focused on, change of my purpose in relationships, and change in the motives behind my actions. This is not behavior modification or self reformation but rather a fresh realization of how dependent I need to be upon God in order for real and lasting change to come about.

Father, I have spent too many years trying and failing to live differently. I now look to You to do what I cannot do on my own. Amen.

Make Me a Servant - Maranatha Singers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rznoe3zKxM&feature=related

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Is It Not Enough?

They assembled together against Moses and Aaron, and said to them, "You have gone far enough, for all the congregation are holy, every one of them, and the LORD is in their midst; so why do you exalt yourselves above the assembly of the LORD?" Numbers 16:3 (New American Standard Bible)

Korah’s jealousy over another person’s position lead him to act out in rebellion and eventually cost him his life. He failed to see that Moses and Aaron were given the places of leadership by God rather than by their own choosing or that of others. He failed to grasp the truth that his position and calling as a Levite was not insignificant. Jealousy over another person’s place, possessions, or position needs to be recognized, acknowledged, and abandoned before the consequences play themselves out in painful ways.

God had one question for Korah as found in Numbers 16:9, “Is it not enough for you to be separated by God to do the service of the tabernacle?” God was reminding him of not only his life’s calling but Who it was that was doing the calling. How much he missed when he minimized God’s purpose for his life and compared his life to that of another.

Can I relate with Korah? Absolutely! Yet, I find great comfort in the reminder his story serves. Too often I can look at the ministries others have and be overcome with feelings of envy and discontent. I can forget God has His own desires and purposes for each of our lives. I can forget God’s ways and thoughts are higher than my own. I can get the idea that I am less loved, less noticed, or less important to God due to the fact that what He does in and through me looks different than that of another person. When opportunities for a particular service elude me or positions of ministry remain out of reach for me, I can mistakenly place a big question mark over the significance of my own life.

God’s answer? Trust Him to do what is best for all. See the worth, meaning, and value of what He has called me and others to do. Rejoice in the variety of vessels He uses to get the work of the Kingdom done. Learn as much as I can during this time in my life as it very well may be a time of preparation for what is to come later. These are the ways to avoid or stop my heart, actions, and thoughts from becoming like Korah’s. When asked if what God has me doing is enough, I want to proclaim with joy, “It is MORE than enough!”

Father, I rejoice that You are not a God who plays favorites in Your work on Earth. With You there is no unimportant task or insignificant vessel. Keep doing a work in and through me for Your honor and glory. Amen.

Jesus, Lover of My Soul (It's All About You)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dD-ZdMOx_HY&feature=related

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

A Heart for God

His heart was not wholly devoted to the LORD his God, like the heart of his father David. I Kings 15:3 (New American Standard Bible)

David’s heart for God was incredible! It was referenced time and time again as new kings took the throne over Israel and Jerusalem. It was the basis for God saying he was a man after His own heart. It brought about the promise of God to future generations. It was the birth place of the book of Psalms so many people have found comfort in. It is what lead him in victory over Goliath, gave him songs of praise in the wilderness, the will to go on when pursued by his enemies, the joy to exult God in his life, and the ability to rule God’s people.

Many of us look at David’s heart for God and we desire his passion! Can you imagine being able to voice such heartfelt worship as he did?! To see God as your entire source for life? To cry out to Him with tears of joy as well as despair? To fully enjoy God and revel in His joy for you? Do you realize if these statements are the deep desires of your heart, then you have a heart for God just like David had a heart for God?

We often have a mistaken idea of what a life looks like when one has a heart for God. We think it somehow becomes a life that is pain free, problem free, and sin free. How far from the truth! Look at David’s life! He knew the pain of rejection, the fear of being pursued by enemies, the experiences of war, the regret of sin. He knew victories as well as defeats. He knew honor as well as looks of disgust. He received words of praise as well as words that wounded. Yes, he sat on a throne. But it followed years of running and hiding in the wilderness. He knew what it was like to sense God’s nearness and yet to be gripped with the fear of abandonment. The bottom line was not that David had an easy, comfortable, ‘heaven on earth’ life. He had a heart for God. In the midst of pain and suffering, facing the consequences of his own sinful choices as well as the sinful choices of others, loss, heartache, victory, and joy, he chose to praise, love, and honor God. David had a freedom to acknowledge the truth about God and the truth about himself. While his wrong actions displeased God and brought about painful consequences, God still acknowledged David’s heart for Him . His propensity toward sin did not cancel out His passion for God.

I rejoice that the same is true for me! Even though I still fail, still make wrong choices, still look to wrong sources to get needs met, and still battle wrong attitudes, my heart for God is not ignored, doubted, or dismissed by my Father. As a result I have victories, I hear His voice, I drink in His encouragement, and I walk knowing He delights in me. Once again, He has touched the heart that desires Him.

Father, like a parent who is touched by an imperfect gift given by their child, You joy in a heart that is devoted to You. I know You see the desire, passion, and hunger I have for you. Please increase it! Amen.

Delight My Heart - Twila Paris
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHmqqKpLu00&feature=related

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

What's Behind it All?

Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Luke 6:37 (New King James Version)

I use to call it perception and felt it was my biggest hindrance to walking in joy and freedom. It was my label for having an idea about what someone was thinking and then responding as if it were the truth. Last night, God used my most recent experience as a wake up call to me. As I struggled to fall asleep and began allowing Him to reveal my heart to me, He wasted no time in pinpointing the problem. Perception was the symptom of a deeper problem. It was being fed by nothing short of judging another individual.

With a little word study, I found that judging means to be of an opinion about someone or something. Condemn means to pronounce one guilty. My perceptions are actually the process of judging and my negative response is the process of condemning. If I struggle with other issues such as insecurity, jealousy, or discontentment, the processes are even more profound.

So how does this work in my life? I enter a room and draw the conclusion that someone does not care about me or want me there by something that is done or not done, said or not said, and WHAM court is officially in session. The “evidence” mounts as every action or word becomes “proof” that my feelings and thoughts are based on truth. In my mind, there is a verdict of guilt and the sentence is to withdraw into a mode of silence and detachment. While my demeanor is noticed it is not understood at all because the individual has no idea they have done anything…and they haven’t.

It is not easy to see this aspect of myself and it is not easy to take the necessary steps of acknowledging it to God and the person who has been in my “courtroom”. Not easy but necessary and very beneficial. I cannot express how much of a load is lifted from my mind and heart when I speak words such as, “I have judged you and I am wrong. Will you forgive me?” As that took place over the phone last night, forgiveness was forthcoming and the courtroom of my doing was cleared.

Let me add, that for those times when someone really doesn’t care about me or want me around, God’s answer is that I walk in forgiveness. I don’t know their heart. I don’t know what’s behind their actions. At that point, I must choose to forgive and entrust them to God to show them their particular issue. Freedom for me will only come as I stay out of the courtroom of judgment and prison of unforgiveness.

Father, keep showing me the heart issues behind my words, thoughts, and actions. Amen.

Potter's Hand - Hillsong
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdkfXhnqbos&feature=related

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Saying and Hearing the Right Thing

Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4:29 (New American Standard Bible)

It is easy to look at this verse as a guide for how I communicate to others and I would do well to use it as such. But this morning God is encouraging me to see myself as the hearer of my own words. His desire is that I make sure what I tell myself is edifying and graceful. Lately I have noticed how often that is not the case and God has graciously been showing me why and how to remedy it.

Unedifying and ungracious words are rooted in the view I have of myself. When I fail to see myself separate from my sin and weaknesses my attitude becomes critical and unloving. It is the exact opposite of hating the sin but loving the sinner. I have heard that phrase many times but was at odds with how to make it a reality and apply it to myself.

God used something I had read in a book to help me see that I build my identity on the worst aspects of myself. The things I do become grounds for believing I am a disgusting, unlovable, unwanted, and undesired person. When fully fostered they result in the thinking that if someone were to really know me and really know what I am like on the inside they would have more than enough reason to walk away and they would leave me. So I learned to keep enough hidden that the people I care the most for wouldn’t leave. It is a cycle that God desires to break and I am getting the first taste of freedom.

He used two things to help me see truth. First, an accountability partnership wherein I committed myself to honesty. Over the course of two years, God brought about a question that my accountability partner would ask that forced me to admit what was really going on inside of me. When I had been through a season of dark moods she would ask, “What triggered it?” The answer exposed my heart and when that happened there was an indescribable freedom and peace that followed. It also allowed me to experience a relationship whereby this individual knew the worst parts of me and chose not to walk away. What a reflection of God’s character. The more I saw that, the more I was able to be honest and open.

The second thing God has used is the realization that my sins and weaknesses do not make me a disgusting person. They are to be hated and dealt with but I am to see myself as a beloved, cherished daughter of God. It is wrong to hate what God cherishes. God is letting me know that as I learn to hate my sin but cherish who I am in Christ, I will begin to have the same ability to demonstrate that toward others.

Father, thank you for one who chose not to walk away and for helping me to see the roots of my own condemning thoughts. I am a recipient of Your love and work. Keep showing me my pathway to freedom. Amen.

Who Am I - Casting Crowns
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VU_rTX23V7Q

I welcome your questions and comments to any devotional thoughts. I am honored and delighted to share my journey with you and privileged to hear of yours.