That Which Causes a Shift

Then Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah, saying, "So may the gods do to me and even more, if I do not make your life as the life of one of them by tomorrow about this time." And he was afraid and arose and ran for his life and came to Beersheba, which belongs to Judah, and left his servant there. 1 Kings 19:2-3 (New American Standard Bible)

I have often been fascinated by the fact that a threat from a woman was all it took for Elijah to be overcome with fear. Elijah! The one who had just stood against Ahab and 400 Baal worshippers. Elijah! The one who saw his prayer for fire from heaven answered in a dramatic way. Elijah! The one who personally heard the voice of God on numerous occasions. Elijah! The one who was used of God to perform many miracles. Yet none of that allowed him to withstand the onslaught of fear. In time, he once again walked with boldness but for a short season he walked in fear.

Ever notice that it doesn’t take much to open an emotional door in our life and experience being over-taken by anger, fear, anxiety, sadness, loneliness, or a host of other feelings? At times it seems to come out of nowhere and yet when it hits it is very apparent. Many of my worst moments have such insignificant beginnings that I am often too embarrassed to admit what triggered the feelings. If asked, my thoughts are usually that it is bad enough that I am even in the mood let alone having to go through the shame of admitting the childish reaction that set it off. While I may be slow in admitting what it is, I usually have no trouble knowing the exact moment and thing that brought about the internal shift. Even so, the conversation can take on the look of a dance as I side-step the issue and generalize my answer. Change is needed in all aspects.

I take comfort in the fact that God knew how to draw out an honest answer from Elijah and He knew the truth that Elijah needed to hear. Elijah felt he was the only one left standing for God and that perception became fodder in which to plant the seeds of fear in his heart. Discouragement was his breeding ground and it can be ours as well. God let him know he was not alone…many others had not left their faith. Once Elijah had some rest, some food, and some truth he was ready to move forward.

While I am learning the process of moving forward after each failure, my heart’s desire is that I find victory in the midst of an onslaught. That I experience the stronghold weakening rather than gaining strength. That I would stand in confidence that God will bring me to such a place.

Father, You’ve said that all things are possible if I will believe. I believe, Lord, help my unbelief. Help me to allow You to do what You long to do in me. Amen.

By Grace Alone - Maranatha Singers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6lhilgWXIE&feature=related

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Carried or Clinging?

And a man who had been lame from his mother's womb was being carried along, whom they used to set down every day at the gate of the temple which is called Beautiful, in order to beg alms of those who were entering the temple….While he was clinging to Peter and John, all the people ran together to them at the so-called portico of Solomon, full of amazement. Acts 3:2, 11 (New American Standard Bible)

This lame man’s story grips my heart today. I relate all too well with his disposition. Unable to walk, he is carried by others out of necessity. We have all been there at one time or another. Maybe not in the physical sense but maybe in the spiritual or emotional sense. Times in our life when we needed the assistance of another person to come to our aid and carry us until we were able to move on our own again. Maybe this lame man thought he would forever be carried. No hope for healing. No hope for change. Yet his healing did come and the change was profound. His carriers were no longer necessary. I am sure both sides felt the joy of ended roles.

Yet nine verses later, this same man (now able to leap, stand, and walk) is found clinging to Peter and John….the ones God used to bring about his healing. Why? It was not that he needed their help to continue to walk. He was doing that and more on his own. Could it be that he (like us) became enamored with the vessels God used? Did he feel a need to stay connected to them even after their purpose in his life had been fulfilled? Was it that he knew other areas in his life were in need of healing and felt he needed them in order for those healings to take place? Did he limit God’s ability to continue to work in his life without those God used presently? While I do not know if those were the issues playing out that day in the life of a former lame man, I do know they are what tend to play out in my own life and the lives of others.

Today, I am once again reviewing the difference between legitimate needs and perceived necessity. When am I being helped out of necessity and when am I refusing to let go out of fear and skewed thinking? God has used and will continue to use significant people in my life but I still need to learn how to receive their help without becoming a clinger. I need to fully embrace David’s words when he said, I saw the Lord constantly before me, for He is at my right hand that I may not be shaken or overthrown or cast down [from my secure and happy state]. To see God as my Source who chooses out of love to use the very people that He uses during specific times in my life. May I learn to cling to Him and appreciate fully the ones He sends.

Father, my need of You is clearly seen each time I desperately hold on to others. Teach me to leap, stand, and walk hand in hand with You! Amen.

Better Than a Hallelujah - Amy Grant
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lD_pCr_Xrnc

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

His Works, His Hands

But now, O LORD, You are our Father, we are the clay, and You our potter; and all of us are the work of Your hand. Isaiah 64:8 (New American Standard Bible)

As a branch in God’s hands, I am pruned at appropriate times in necessary ways. As His sheep, I am shepherded and cared for. As clay upon His wheel and in His hands I am molded to His likings. I long for the results that come from His involvement in my life but often squirm during the process. This morning I am asking myself what the process has entailed.

It has entailed taking me out of comfort zones, removing significant individuals from my life, showing me the truth about His heart and character, showing me the dangers of living out of my emotions, correcting wrong steps I take, transforming my character and thoughts, exposing my weaknesses and wounds, teaching me to live according to truth rather than perceptions, redirecting my attention to what He is presently doing rather than what He has done in the past, instilling in me a teachable spirit in the midst of difficult lessons, and wiping away tears that fall when I don’t understand what He is doing or forget that He is doing all things out of love.

I am a recipient and example of His labor of love and that knowledge requires trust on my part. Trust that God knows what He is doing. Trust that He will accomplish that which He has determined to do. Trust that He will keep His word. Trust that He is able to do far more than I could imagine. Trust that my limitations do not limit Him. Trust that at no time does His love for me become merely toleration. Trust that I have not exhausted His supply of mercy, grace, forgiveness, and strength. Trust that He will eventually bring me to the point that I completely release all that I am still holding on to. Trust that His requirements of me are good, necessary, and beneficial.

He knows my personality and make up. My weaknesses and bents. My places of stubbornness. My potential. My fears and insecurities. With that knowledge He has not abandoned me, become exasperated by me, shamed me, or given up on me. His involvement in my life has not waned in the least. I marvel at the thought of that and it comes against all preconceived ideas I have had of myself and Him.

Father, show me where I still lack trust in You. Teach me to fix my eyes on You. Amen.

He Knows My Name - Maranatha Singers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXsiWoyjw60&feature=related

I welcome your questions and comments to any devotional thoughts. I am honored and delighted to share my journey with you and privileged to hear of yours.

Breaking the Pattern

They will sanctify My name; indeed, they will sanctify the Holy One of Jacob and will stand in awe of the God of Israel. Those who err in mind will know the truth, and those who criticize will accept instruction. Isaiah 29:23,24 (New American Standard Bible)

I have learned that when an uneasy feeling settles over me or I begin feeling shaky internally, it is time to do some searching. It is not enough to know there is a problem, I must get to the root of the problem. The “symptoms” I am experiencing will not go away without dealing with what is causing them to surface. Today’s verse shows me the issue and the solution. My shift of emotions, attitudes, and feelings can usually be traced back to error filled thinking and a critical spirit. God’s answer for me is to know the truth, accept His instruction, sanctify (revere) His name, and stand in awe of Him. But these are only words on a page unless I put them into practice on a daily basis.

James reminds me to be a doer of the Word and not merely a hearer. Truth only changes me as I apply it to my life. So what makes this so difficult to do? Many things. When one has spent years making wrong choices of thoughts and emotions there is a pattern that must be broken. The strongholds of idolatry and self pity must be acknowledged and torn down. What use to feel good and seem right must be seen as detrimental to my spiritual, emotional, and social health. When one has grown accustomed to jumping into one mental pit after another there comes a time when staying out of the pit must be a priority and accepted choice.

The words of 2 Chronicles 25:8 come to mind which says, “The Lord has much more to give you than this.” The “this” He is referring to for me this morning is all the ways I have learned to cope and survive emotionally. As I make my way around an all too familiar “spiral” God is letting me know He has a better way for me to think and act than what I have been use to. While I may feel shaky, He is reminding me of all the solid things in my life such as His Word, His Spirit, and Himself. This is what He is using to redirect my focus and my heart back toward Himself. As they take center stage for me, the rest begins to lessen and weaken. Calm replaces turmoil. Joy replaces discontentment. Peace replaces uneasiness. It is continually realigning myself to trusting, believing, acknowledging, and accepting Who God is and His ways for me. Precept upon precept, line upon line, here a little, there a little (Isaiah 28:13). Change and growth take God, time, and continual cooperation. With that I move forward instead of down. Praise Him!

Father, the old ways are slowly giving way to Your ways. How You long to free me from what has been a way of life for me. Keep teaching me to turn to You and abide in You. Amen.

Change My Heart Oh God - Eddie Espinosa
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEtsHWFE6-w

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Back to the Basics

With Him are wisdom and strength, He has counsel and understanding. Job 12:13 (New King James Version)

Job had it right when he penned these words! I, too often, have slipped other names into this verse and believed in my heart it was okay to view individuals as storehouses of wisdom, strength, counsel and understanding. I ran to them with questions, tuned my ears to any words they spoke, looked to them for all the answers, and pretty much made them my counterfeit messiah. Even when I began to see that it was God who I needed to look to, I still had hopes that significant individuals would come across my path and “fix” anything in me that was messed up, broken, or hurting. While I knew God is a Spirit and we must worship Him in spirit and in truth, I still had a need to connect with others.

People have often told me that we need each other and that is true! God has called us to encourage one another. He uses people in many ways to minister to us and teach us valuable truths. We are not meant to live completely isolated or independent of others. As Job said in Job 13:1, “My eye has seen all this. My ear has heard and understood it. What you know I also know.”

Once again, the problem is not knowing these things, the problem is finding the right balance between seeking God and looking to people. Just when I think I have managed to find that balance the scales of my soul begin to quiver once again. It is an ever present struggle. One in which both God and I are acutely aware. We also know my tendency to go from one extreme to the other. That is to jump into relationships or go it alone! It is the “all or nothing” mental trap.

This morning I once again lay it all aside and realign myself with the basic truth that God is my primary Source for wisdom, strength, counsel, and understanding. With that as my foundational truth, I look to Him and admit I don’t know how to view the relationships in my life. Right now, in the quietness of my home and heart there are a myriad of questions, concerns, and apprehensions running through my mind. I don’t have the answers but I know the One who does. I turn to Him.

Father, I have gotten it wrong so often and You have never failed to welcome me back to You. Help me to find the balance between You and those You lovingly bring into my life. I admit my need of You. Amen.

I Need Thee Every Hour - Selah
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o2ULhi1szjk

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Free to be Different

He did right in the sight of the LORD and walked in all the way of his father David, nor did he turn aside to the right or to the left. 2 Kings 22:2 (New American Standard Bible)

As I read through the books of Kings I am struck by the ones who do evil in the sight of the Lord and the ones who do right in the sight of the Lord. As soon as I come to the name of a new king my eyes skip ahead to see which it will be in each case. Very seldom do I notice two kings in a row doing right in the sight of the Lord. There will usually be a number of kings doing evil and then like a ray of sunshine a king comes on the scene with the distinction of doing right. What delight to see it!

Although Josiah’s father and grandfather did evil during their reigns, Josiah did not follow suite. At the young age of eight he not only took the throne, he lived his life distinctly different from those who came before him. His life was defined by three profound principles: he did right in the sight of the Lord, walked in all the ways of his ancestor King David, and stayed the course God had put him on. He had found that what really matters in life is to live within the parameters of what God desires of us, to follow the examples of the godly people who walked before us, and to stay focused on God’s path for our life.

For those of us who came from less than ideal home lives, Josiah becomes our older brother who reminds us that our families need not define us. There may be a long line of family traits that appear to not want to let go of us but God can rewrite ANY story. I did not grow up in a Christian home but God curtailed the direction of my life’s path when at the age of fourteen I accepted Christ and became God’s daughter. By the grace of God I was spared the very things that had come to mark my family: alcoholism, divorce, drug abuse, and immorality. There is no question in my mind that my life would look very different if God had not intervened. It not only benefited me but it broke the chain of generational bents for my children as well.

Father, thank you for forming me in my mother’s womb and then redirecting the steps of my life. In Your hands ANYTHING can be restored, renewed, and redeemed! Amen.

All Who Are Thirsty - Robin Mark
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrnvSf2dX18&feature=related

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

When Forgiveness is Fully Received

Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the LORD does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit. Psalm 32:1-2 (New International Version)

David knew the taste of sin and regret in his own life. He knew what it was like to bring about painful consequences in another person’s life because of his own sin and sinful choices. He knew what it was like to not be able to go back and undo damage he had caused or fix messes he had made. Many have been the people who have lived frozen in that realization but not David. No matter the size or ramifications of the sin, he was one who brought it to God and received the forgiveness only God could give. The consequences were still there but the condemnation and guilt were removed and in that he marveled, danced, and delighted!

Sometimes the most difficult part about walking in forgiveness is believing that we really are forgiven. To have the sense of the Message when it says forgiveness is being given a fresh start and a slate that has been wiped clean. To no longer live under the guilt or condemnation of past mistakes, sins, and wrongs. As long as we feel it is still hanging over our lives, we remain unable to move forward. So we walk in a vicious cycle of guilt, confession, forgiveness, guilt. No sense of release. No sense of closure. It doesn’t go away. We remain trapped. These are a sure sign that God’s forgiveness is not being experienced or embraced.

I have found that some incredible things take place when I have fully understood and experienced God’s forgiveness. First, the condemnation is gone! My spirit is able to breath again. Second, I am better able to extend forgiveness to others. Third, I no longer sense a need to be forgiven by others. While it is imperative that I ask people to forgive me if I have wronged them, their choice to forgive me is for their benefit not mine. In truth, any unforgiveness they hold on to imprisons, controls, and binds them until they choose to walk in forgiveness and freedom.

Now that I know that, I am better equipped to pray for that person with the desire that they really would be released from a heart of unforgiveness. It may take time as they work through the hurt, blaming, anger, and unhappiness but God will be relentless to bring them to a point of realizing their heart attitude is their own responsibility. It is up to them to choose the path of forgiveness. Their freedom comes as they let go of the notion that they are entitled to feel the way they feel and harbor what they are harboring. I have seen God do that very thing in the life of a loved one and I praise Him for it!

Father, receiving Your forgiveness has changed me and my life. Amen.

He Has Forgiven Me - Damaris Carbaugh
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQhHN_Ed4sk

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.