Soul Clinging

Not what I will [not what I desire], but as You will and desire. Matthew 26:39 Amplified Bible

It takes two things in order for this prayer to truly become my own. It takes a child-like trust in God and a willingness to let go of the very things I am clinging to. One author referred to it as “soul clinging.” The minute I read that phrase I knew the meaning of it.

I will hold tightly to that which I believe will bring me pleasure, satisfaction, fulfillment, and delight. What I have grown use to and dependent upon I often cling to the tightest. What I feel I need and cannot live without remains in my grasp. I am not only a creature of habit but I am a creature of survival as well. Without the realization that God has my best interest at heart and stands ready to offer me those things that will far surpass anything I am clinging to, I will be unable and unwilling to let go. They may be things that are good in themselves but wrong for me. Their usefulness has been complete, their purpose has been fulfilled, and their essence of life has been extracted. But exchanges will not be made until I extend open and empty hands to my heavenly Father.

I have experienced the pain of having my fingers pried from the “treasures” I held on to, but my soul continued to cling to them for all I was worth. How God’s heart must ache to see me hesitate and resist His work in my life. I foolishly think I know what is best and try to wait God out in order for Him to finally give me what I am so sure I need. In reality, I simply postponing His intended blessing and desire for me.

When I look at the two choices I may be tempted to think mine is the better option. I assume the exchange will not bring about the same results I think I will find in having my way. The tears fall, the ache continues, the turmoil remains until I finally see I am hurting myself through resisting change. It clouds my vision, skews my thinking, robs me of joy, and frustrates me with sleepless nights. How sad and how unnecessary! God knows the reasons behind my actions. Sometimes it is pride. Sometimes it is distrust. Sometimes it is hurts and wounds. Sometimes it is lack of knowledge. But EVERY time it is choice and contrast of wills. And each day it is with patience and love that God continues to offer me what is best! He knows the joy that awaits me if I would but make the exchange.

Father, tears have fallen as I have continued to hold on to my will, my dreams, and my desires. Help me to live with abandon and trust in You. Help me to let go! Amen.

That Which Stops Progress

He utterly destroyed them, along with the other cities and villages of the plain, wiping out all the people and every bit of vegetation. But Lot’s wife looked back as she was following behind him, and she turned into a pillar of salt. Genesis 19:25, 26 New Living Translation

Journeys are meant to progress forward. They entail leaving behind the things we once clung to and held dear. The first steps can be the most painful and daunting but they are necessary. One must realize though that other steps forward must follow the initial ones taken. For Lot’s wife, she started on the journey away from Sodom, following behind her husband. But not far down the road of departure she stopped, looked back, and brought about the consequences of being turned into a pillar of salt. Her journey ended!

While I may look back on places in my life I miss and often long for, and will not be turned into a pillar of salt because of it, God is presently teaching me a valuable lesson. Whenever I look back I stop my own progress. My heart can only be directed forward or backward….both are not possible at the same time. In a sense, when I look back and allow the loss to consume me, it has the same effect on me as being turned into a pillar of salt. I become stuck in that one place. All movement stops, all growth stops, all freedom stops, all development stops UNTIL I determine to get my eyes back on Jesus and the journey He has in store for me.

This morning I am asking myself why I even look back. The answers are revealing some mindsets that need God’s touch. Looking back comes when I am convinced the past is more pleasant than the present or the future. When the comforts of the past feel more secure than the present or the future. When the people of the past seem more encouraging then the present or the future. But what I fail to realize is that the very things I look back to were at one time “future” for me. Before the people came into my life, they were the things God had in store for me. With that in mind, am I believing a lie that God does not continue to have relationships and events planned out for me to eventually experience? I was! But not now!

The truth is, God still has good things in store for me. He still has significant people to bring into my life. He still has things to teach me. As long as I take in breath I am in His company, under His care, upheld by His mercy, and living in His embrace. With that in mind, I once again face the front, grasp His hand, and proceed with joy!

Father, I have wasted so much time looking back. You have a journey laid out for me. I step on to the trail with abandon as I join You for what is ahead! Amen.

When Others Cannot See It

Therefore they said to him, “How were your eyes opened?” He answered and said, “A Man called Jesus made clay and anointed my eyes and said to me, ‘Go to the pool of Siloam and wash.’ So I went and washed, and I received sight.” John 9:10,11 NKJV

When God touches your life in a dramatic way you KNOW that you KNOW the truth of what happened. No amount of other people’s skepticism, questioning, or opposition can change what has happened to you. A man who was born blind was given sight by Jesus (John 9). He knew that a miracle had taken place in his life and no matter how often he told his story, his account never changed. I am sure there were times he longed for others to celebrate the miracle with him. But when it came to the religious leaders of his day (the Pharisees), there was no celebration to be experienced. They were blind to his miracle of sight because it had taken place on the Sabbath. They could not see the hand of God because of their own extreme interpretations of the law. They had missed the heart of the law as God intended it and hence missed the heart of God when He intervened in people’s lives. How sad! Does it still happen today? Absolutely!

Maybe some who are reading this are experiencing negative responses from others because of God’s work in their life. Many can attest to the isolation experienced when it becomes necessary for them to step away from the beliefs of others in order to embrace God and His Word in life changing ways. They may have had to step out of many man-made boxes in order to live out their faith authentically and in connection with God. Maybe they knew ahead of time there would be such negative ramifications or maybe the response has taken them by complete surprise. God would have each one know that they are not alone. They are being called into a special relationship with Him and the growth is going to be profound.

I long for others to learn what I have learned. God’s hands are bigger than any human hand that lets go of them. He more than replaces any loss they sustain. They will begin hearing things from Him that were always blocked by the voices of those around them. They will finally see what it means to walk in intimacy with the God of all creation! I cheer them on because I know their life will never be the same…….it will be better!!!


Father, I do not regret any decision I have made to know You more. You gave me gifts that others condemned. I receive them with abundant joy! Continue to do Your work in me even when it means others will not understand. Free me to follow You! Amen.

A Continual Invitation

Blessed be God, Who has not turned away my prayer, nor His mercy from me! Psalm 66:20 NKJV

God assures me through His Word that my prayers do not fall on deaf ears and His mercy is not withheld. His goodness endures continually! I find comfort in that, especially when it seems I often bring the same issues to Him. He knows that with each time, He is bringing me that much closer to freedom and His desired growth in my life. He knows what insecurities still lie buried in me. He knows what areas still need His redemptive touch. But each time I come to Him in sincerity and truth He peels off yet another layer from my heart. He does not set limits on the number of times I confront internal issues, external circumstances, or anything else that weighs heavy on me.

What does this do for me? It gives me the freedom to approach Him with my needs. It encourages honesty! I don’t have to play pretend with Him. I can come as often as I want to come and stay as long as I need to stay. I don’t have to try and rush the growth process.

I can remember a time not too long ago that I hugged a person and proclaimed I was free in a certain area in my life. At the time, I thought I was. God knew better! He knew there was still work to be done. I had not faced all the issues yet or dealt with all the pain. I wanted the freedom so badly but really wasn’t there yet. I tried to rush things. The result was that I crashed big time the next day. My emotions revealed the true state of my heart. God’s invitation was clear. “Come to Me. We still have work to do.” And as I came, He listened and extended His mercy!

What am I learning? If it is still on my heart and mind it is still an area for prayer. I will know when the lesson has been learned, the truth has been grasped, and the full freedom has been embraced. God is patient. He knows how long each issue will take. I don’t have to fear I will wear Him out or exhaust His loving kindness. He does not change. I speak my words into His open ears, grasp His extended hand, and hold His undivided attention. May I offer those same things to Him as He speaks to me.


Father, nothing in my life is insignificant or off limits to You. Thank you for instituting prayer and desiring open communication. May the dialogue between us be productive and precious. Amen.

Someone Is Praying For You

I pray for them. I do not pray for these alone, but also for those who will believe in Me through their word. John 17:9, 20 NKJV

We often read of the times that Jesus prayed. Sometimes those prayers were in private and sometimes they were in the company of others. The 17th chapter of John gives us an opportunity to listen in on one of His prayers. As I read it this morning I was struck by the things Jesus lifted up to the Father on my behalf. And not just my behalf but for anyone who knows Him as Savior. Hebrews 7:25 assures me that He continues the intercession for us in Heaven. He is still praying for us! Do you have certain people in your life who pray for you? Have they ever shared the specifics of those prayers? What would it mean to you if they wrote down the prayers and shared them with you? Let’s take a look at those things Jesus has already prayed and continues to pray for us.

He prayed that we would have unity. That they may be one as we are one. He prayed that we would have His joy. That they might have my joy fulfilled in themselves. He prayed for our protection. That You should keep them from the evil one. He prayed for our sanctification. That they also may be sanctified by the truth. He prayed that we would experience His love. That the love with which You loved Me may be in them, and I in them.

When I dare to slip my name into each of those phrases I begin to grasp the personal, loving nature of Jesus’ prayers for me. Those prayers have not changed and yet I am aware of the fact that they are also not limited to just this list alone. He knows me inside and out. He knows my past, present, and future. Therefore, His prayers for me are thorough, passionate, effective, and powerful.

His invitation to me today is to begin to grasp the preciousness of such a Prayer Partner, to pray in agreement with Him, and then extend those prayers to others. And one of the most powerful ways to do that is implement Scripture into my prayers. I can use these very verses or numerous other ones when I am praying about a need in my own life or in the life of others. http://www.biblegateway.com/ is a valuable tool for doing just that. I can put in a word and it will show me every verse in the Bible that uses that word. Plus it will give me a choice of numerous Bible versions to choose from. I simply pick a verse that I then want to include in my prayer. This is what is meant by praying God’s Word and He delights when we do that! May many of us choose to make this a daily practice.

Father, Jesus knew the power of prayer. He demonstrated it to us and continues to be our example. Help me to be more like Him. Amen.

Seeing What Needs to Be Skimmed

Remove the impurities from silver, and the sterling will be ready for the silversmith. Proverbs 25:4 New Living Translation

I notice a pattern within myself. Walk a journey with God long enough and patterns become very evident. My most recent “pattern” has to do with unresolved hurts, disappointments, and thoughts. Avoidance, positive thinking, and denial are not the right paths for me to take. Allowing things to stay buried in hopes that they will somehow go away or resolve themselves is self-deception at best and self-destruction at worst. As a wise Teacher, God allows me to experience the pain and consequences of choices and then reveals to me where my thinking has become skewed, truth is being blocked, and healing is being hindered.

My heart’s desire is to grow and mature in my faith. I want the changes that God can bring about in my life. The problem comes when I want to rush the process and conveniently side step issues of my heart. God will not allow the success of either one. He urges me to keep pace with Himself and remain transparent and teachable to Him. It is not always easy but indeed it is necessary.

I have certain harmful mindsets that continue to wreak havoc in my life. They stem from lies, distortions, and misperceptions that I have carried with me since childhood. They affect the way I interpret things. Painful events leave a mark on me and unless I allow God to redefine my interpretations I begin to build up a huge amount of wrong thinking that eventually affects my attitude, moods, and quality of life. For a while I can seem to do fine, and then the dam of my own making breaks and I am enveloped by the very things I thought I had kept hidden and refused to bring out in the light.

This morning I have come out of one of these experiences and God is showing me the truth of today’s verse. My heart is the silver. The impurities are the wrong mindsets. Each time I am willing to voice to Him what is really going on inside of me, it is like setting a pot of liquid silver over a fire. The heat causes the impurities to come to the surface and God graciously skims them off the top. Are there still impurities to be dealt with? Yes, but each time things become clearer, purer, and more refined. This was His way of letting me know that if I do not allow Him to take me through the skimming process, the mindsets will forever remain obstacles in my life.

Father, You are so patient with me. May I continue to learn it is always safe to confide in You. Trust in You and transparency with You are my pathways to lasting change and freedom. Amen.

Where to Take the Hunger

O God, You are my God; I shall seek You earnestly; My soul thirsts for You, my flesh yearns for You, in a dry and weary land where there is no water. Psalm 63:1 NASB

David penned these words in a wilderness. A place where food and water would be scarce if existent at all. He could easily relate his physical hunger and thirst to his spiritual hunger and thirst. The way his body craved sustenance was the way his soul craved God! God often times will use our physical world to help enlighten us on the spiritual world. Hence, Jesus’ use of parables to explain kingdom principles to His disciples. God knows I am a visual person so He is creative and extravagant with the visual aides He uses in my life.

Yesterday He used a moment of hunger to teach me some valuable truths. He reminded me of all the times I sought to avoid hunger at all costs. I would often choose to eat before hunger sat in as a way of preventing myself from even experiencing it. Food choices were poor, amounts were ridiculous, and the results were not good. I could not grasp the idea that hunger did not have to be feared. I can remember many days whereby I would eat whatever I wanted, in whatever amount I wanted, and every time I wanted. Yet, it never satisfied me. Talk about frustrating! What I had to learn was that there were right times to eat and right ways to eat.

God took those thoughts and opened my eyes to the spiritual significance. Just as I would avoid hunger at all costs, I had learned to avoid emptiness at all costs. I needed to be on spiritual highs and looked to fill my soul with relationships, knowledge, and activities. Always on the hunt. Always trying to take in “stuff” from my external world to fill up my internal world. God has shown me that although those things are good in themselves they are not my answer. He keeps saying, “Let Me be the One you hunger for and let Me be the One to satisfy you. When no one is available it becomes OUR time to be together. I will answer your questions, meet your needs, fill your emptiness, and satisfy your heart needs. I created you and know what’s best for you. Let me take care of you. Trust Me.”

Will going to Him bring about permanent results? No. As long as I live in this world and in this body I will have needs to bring to Him. I will have areas that need fixing. I will have places that need filling. Going to Him is a daily necessity! He will let me know when I am “feeding” on the wrong things and when I am looking to the wrong sources. He will not let the substitutes work for me. He loves me that much!

Father, I know what it is to be internally hungry. Keep teaching me to come to You with the needs and find true filling and satisfaction. Amen.

Whose Will?

I do not seek or consult My own will [I have no desire to do what is pleasing to Myself, My own aim, My own purpose] but the will and pleasure of the Father Who sent Me. John 30:6b Amplified Bible

Jesus set the standard high when He spoke these to the very people who were seeking to kill Him. They were the truth by which He lived His life. From the moment of His conception to His ascension, He had but one mindset….to do the will of His Father. With Jesus, there was no other longing, desire, or purpose in life. His actions stemmed from it. His words were birthed from it. His attitude was a result of it. He did not make a plan, perform a miracle, have a conversation, or draw a conclusion that did not coincide with His Father’s will and pleasure.

As I go through my day can His words be my own? Will I allow Him to do such a work in me that everything comes down to God’s will over my own will? Knowing that His ways are higher than my ways and His thoughts are higher than my thoughts should be grounds enough for preferring His will over mine. With that said, what makes it so difficult?

I live in a fallen world…so did Jesus. I taste rejection and hurts from people….so did Jesus. I come up against trials, temptation, and troubles…so did Jesus. I have faced misjudgment, mistreatment, and misunderstanding….so did Jesus. I know hunger, tears, and heartache…so did Jesus. I have an enemy who seeks to destroy me…so did Jesus. The list could go on and on but my point is this, Jesus faced most of what I face in this world. He knows what I face each day because He faced it as well. And yet there are differences that reveal the nature of my difficulties to voice His words for myself.

I have a sin nature. My view of life is limited and my view of the future is blocked. I can only be in one place at a time. While I house divinity within myself in the form of the Holy Spirit, I am not divinity itself. My flesh is at war with my spirit. These are just a few of reasons it is imperative that I pattern my life after Jesus. He spent time in prayer, saturated Himself with Scripture, spoke the truth to Himself and others, and lived with the sole purpose of doing His Father’s will. In order to do that I must come to the place of seeing my need for His help. May I learn to whisper “Not my will by Thine be done” to every circumstance, situation, difficulty, loss, and tear as I go through my day. Trust Him, follow Him, listen to Him, and obey Him with abandon! May His words be my heartbeat today!

Father, may Christ’s words live in me! Amen.

Only God

Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us. Psalm 62:8 KJV

Charles Spurgeon once wrote, “Happy is the man who feels that all he has, all he wants, and all he expects are to be found in his God.” David must have lived by this same truth when he penned such phrases as My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation. Any believer who finally comes to realize the same thing as these two men steps into a whole new realm of faith. I want that kind of walk!

I look at Psalm 62:8 and I want God to be the one I trust in at all times, confide in with abandon, and rest in with complete confidence. I don’t want to go after the counterfeits. I don’t want to seek out someone else’s ear or heart. I don’t want to look for a person to make me feel safe, secure, or protected. I want all of that to come from my relationship with Him. The truth of the matter is that I am not there yet. I have known it for decades but was only able to admit it in recent years. Does that admittance discourage me? No! It frees me!

I am coming to realize that growth in the Christian life is a step by step, gradual process. Many times I have had to look back over months or even years to see that any progress has been made. In the area of looking to God alone I see two encouraging advancements. First, I now long to experience God in the way I have described. Years ago it never entered my mind…wasn’t even something that appealed to me. Second, I don’t sense condemnation or disappointment from my Father. He knows where He intends to lead me in all of this and cheers me on as I move toward His goal for me. Within that context of acceptance and embrace I now feel free to admit the things He already knows about me.

This morning I am asking myself some necessary questions. What are my trust issues with God? What is it that I need to voice to Him? What are my insecurities that need to find refuge in Him? I will find the answers and healing as I acknowledge anything He reveals to me. No more hiding, excusing, blaming, or running. Trust, communication, and safety are but a few of the many gifts He holds out to me on a daily basis. Praise Him!

Father, I hear Your invitation to intimacy. Show me anything that still hinders me from seeing You as the ONLY one! Amen.

I Still Miss Her

In March of 2000, I sat in the balcony at my church and took in the fact that I would soon be facing my first Mothers' Day without my mom. She had been killed in a car accident after suffering a heart attack the previous February. I still remember the profound ache and extraordinary loss that enveloped me. Physically I felt like someone had taken a piece of barbed wire and shoved it into my chest...then proceeded to twist it. My mom who was so full of life. The one with whom I could laugh the hardest. The one I took after in so many ways. The one with whom I enjoyed Christian fellowship for the last 14 years of her life. The one who over came her alcoholism but struggled with depression. The one who loved me and cheered me on in life. The one who adored my children. Gone. Heaven held her and I couldn't get to her.

It was in March when the Lord gave me a poem which I would like to share with all of you. Written with my mom in mind, I now dedicate it to all of you who have lost your mothers....whether years ago or recently. While my personal pain and sorrow have subsided and good memories have replaced them, my heart goes out to any who face a difficult Mothers' Day this year. God bless you and may His presence be your comfort.

I Still Miss Her

It seems like only yesterday
I sent a Mother’s Day card away.
I didn’t think it would be the last,
I signed it with love and mailed it fast.
Now that she has gone away,
It doesn’t feel like Mother’s Day.
There are no more chances to send a card,
To ship some flowers, to make a call.
There’s no more thanking her for all she’s done.
No more visits,
No more fun.
I cannot hug her or kiss her cheek.
I cannot even share a laugh.
It all too quickly became the past.
I took each visit with her for granted.
I thought there’d always be more to come.
The camera lies still now
From her use and mine.
All the pictures have been taken,
All the memories have been made.
All the words have been spoken,
All the letters have been mailed.
The thing I miss the most of all
Has got to be her voice
Whether on the telephone or talking face to face.
I’d wish for one more conversation either here or at her place.
I know I’ll see her again some day,
We’ll share the sights of heaven.
We’ll talk, we’ll laugh, we’ll hug,
We’ll kiss….it’ll be Mother’s Day once more.
But until then I’ll be a mom for Mother’s Day instead of
Being a daughter.

Pam Shattuck
March, 2000

Wanting What Seems Good to Him

But if He says thus: ‘I have no delight in you,’ here I am, let Him do to me as seems good to Him.” 2 Samuel 15:26 NKJV

David knew how to trust God with abandon! He knew that his best choice in life was to allow God to do whatever seemed good to Him to do. So often we think we know what is best for us. We think we know what we want our lives to be like. And yet we are not God and we do not possess the capabilities of God. He is omnipresent….everywhere at once. He is omnipotent….all powerful. He is omniscient….all knowing. We are not!!!

What is it this morning that each of us is longing for Him to do? What is it we want? Are we able to do what David learned to do and leave the decisions and directions of our lives in God’s capable hands? Are we willing to admit we really don’t know what is best for us? We really don’t know life as God knows it.

Is it wrong to dream? No! Is it wrong to ask God to give us the desires of our heart? Absolutely not! Is it wrong to want certain things in life? No way! But in the midst of it all, we must admit that God’s ways and thoughts are higher than our own. Anything we can think of is miniscule compared to His vastness and wisdom. So why is it so hard at times to trust God absolutely the way David trusted Him?

Could it be we still fail to understand His heart? We often think God is out to deprive us and hold out on us. We fail to grasp that His plans go far beyond our own. He is a bigger dreamer and a bigger “carry outer” of those dreams then we are. Convinced that we have better dreams and a clearer understanding of how our life should work is the ultimate in pride! No wonder God speaks so much about humbling ourselves before Him. He is not trying to ruin our life, He is longing to enrich it! He is not trying to deprive us, He is passionate about filling and fulfilling us!

Adam and Eve come to mind this morning. God wanted the garden for them and they reached for the fruit. Anything apart from what God intends for us is always a move in the wrong direction. What a shame that we often settle for less than His best. As one author so aptly put it, “We are often satisfied to play with mud pies while God is offering us an ocean side resort!” Anytime I can let Him do to, through, for, and in me what seems best to Him, I am always opening myself up for an unbelievably better life than what I could come up with on my own.

Father, I entrust myself to You today. I cannot possibly know, see, or do more than You. Do what seems good for You to do with me for the rest of my life! Amen.

His Presence and His Words

And as they thus spoke, Jesus Himself stood in the midst of them and said unto them, “Peace be unto you.” Luke 24:36 21st Century KJV

Scripture is meant to be more than nice thoughts on a page. It is meant to house itself in our life! In every situation, every circumstance, every detail. There is not a thing that we face as God’s beloved child whereby Luke 24:36 is not able to be our experience. Wherever we are, whatever is happening, Jesus stands in our midst and voices these same words to us personally….”Peace be unto you.” He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He is a God who never changes. His heart of compassion that was so evident in Bible times is still beating for us today.

Some who are reading this devotional are facing unbelievable challenges today. It may be a health issue, a financial crisis, a tragic loss, extraordinary pain, or any number of things. My prayer for them is that they would profoundly sense the presence of Jesus in their midst. That their ears would detect the sound of His voice.

The peace He speaks of can truly be more powerfully felt than the tragedy at hand. It surpasses any peace that the world offers. It is a quietness and rest that accompanies a confidence, trust, and dependency on an almighty, loving Heavenly Father. He is not only the Shepherd of Psalm 23, He is OUR Shepherd. Tender, compassionate, and ever attentive. While many things may block our view of Him, NOTHING can rob us of His presence. He cannot be kept out or silenced when it comes to His child. He does not leave, He does not forsake, He does not abandon, He does not miss a thing. He is still a very present help in time of trouble.

Someone once said, “Every step in the journey we may take in the Lord’s own company.” And within that company we can allow His words in Isaiah 43:1,2 to be our comfort and strength. “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; you are Mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned.”

Along with all this let me assure you of a few things. Tears are appropriate and He invites us to cry on His shoulder. Fears are understandable and He longs for us to voice them to Him. Uncertainty is natural and He will listen as we confide in Him. There is no thought, feeling, or emotion that He is not aware of and willing to replace with His peace, confidence, and assurance. He will be the only One available 24/7. In the midst of it all, speak to Him, take Him at His word, hold on to the Scriptures He gives to you, lean on Him, and keep receiving all that He offers you. And when it all passes, you will know Him in a way you never knew before.

Father, my heart is heavy for those who are hurting. I take comfort in the fact that Your heart is touched by their hurts, losses, and troubles. May they sense Your presence and hear Your words to them today. Amen.

My Daily Choice

That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. John 3:6 KJV

I was physically born on November 5 , 1958, and spiritually reborn on July 13, 1973. The first birth placed me into my family. The second birth placed me into God’s family. The first birth allowed me to live out of the physical aspects of my life. The second birth allowed me to live out of the spiritual aspects of my life. It was then that I was able to make real choices to choose between my flesh and my spirit.

This morning God is helping me to grasp a concept that has eluded me for a long time. My flesh will always live independent of God, be self absorbed, want my own way, yield to sin, think the worst of others, thrive on negative thinking, and feed on what is not good for me. It will nurse hurts, hold on to grudges, and refuse to let go of the very things that obstruct growth in my Christian life. It will always be my enemy. Outside of Christ, I have no other way to live.

But as a child of God, my spirit will always seek God, embrace His ways, seek His approval, view life through His grid of truth, desire His perspective on things, and long to live in intimate fellowship with Him. It will readily submit to His ways, entrust hurts to Him, and daily make exchanges with Him. It will always be my greatest ally and will always find satisfaction and delight in Him.

Knowing these two things becomes the basis for how I choose to live my life. If I choose to live out of the flesh I will journey away from God. My thoughts, actions, and words will not be aligned with His. I will curl up with lies, befriend anger, make myself at home with selfishness, and lack any semblance of satisfaction. If I choose to live out of my spirit I will journey arm and arm with the Creator of the universe for my spirit ALWAYS seeks God, desires God, and aligns itself with God above all others. It is never torn between its own way and God’s way. It is never disloyal to Him, distrusting of Him, or dishonest with Him. It is the only part of me that knows how to continually connect with Him.

Each day I must choose the things born out of my spirit over the things that are born out of my flesh. May my spirit give birth to many thoughts, words, and actions. May my choice of habitation be from my spirit. For it is the most alive part of me that lives linked to God.

Father, because Your Spirit lives in me, my spirit is alive and well. Help me to live out of my spirit. May it give birth to much today! Amen.

A Death Wish

But he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a juniper tree: and he requested for himself that he might die; and said, It is enough; now, O LORD, take away my life; for I am not better than my father. I Kings 19:4 KJV

I am writing today’s devotional with the awareness that some may be reading this who have in fact attempted to take their own lives through suicide. Others are reading it who, like Elijah, have prayed that God would just let them die. Knowing that God created us in His image with a strong desire to live, I am asking myself what it is that causes a person to desire death over life?

For Elijah it was fear. Jezebel had threatened his life and he ran for his life only to sit down and pray the Lord would let him die. For others it may be any number of issues that cause life to seem unbearable. Darkness sets in, reason leaves, confusion abounds, and there does not seem to be a way of escape or even a desire to find the escape.

I have known three distinct times in my life when I voiced such a prayer to God….or at least strongly wished He would just allow my life to end. One time was several years ago when my mother passed away. The ache of losing her engulfed me and there were times while driving I longed for semi trucks to just make their way over to my lane to end it all in one horrific accident. The other time was with the loss of a significant person in my life a year ago. Again, the enormous ache and pain left me with a death wish. I just wanted to stop hurting. Most recently it was during the darkest time of spiritual oppression that I have ever known. I felt isolated from every significant person in my life, questioned my own validity with God, doubted I should even write devotionals, and felt such darkness that again I despaired and wished God would just let me die. The fact that I am writing this devotional today reveals His ways are higher than my ways. Praise Him!

In the first two instances, time was a factor in regaining a desire to live. This most recent time was becoming acutely aware of how involved the enemy was in my life. David said in Psalm 55, “Because of the voice of the enemy…my heart is sore pained within me; and the terrors of death are fallen upon me.” I know now that the dark thoughts, multitude of confusion, and ultimate thought of death were his whispers. But God’s voice spoke louder. He listened the night my constant prayer was, “Jesus, I need You.” He held me when I lacked the strength to hold on to Him. And He revealed to me the true nature of my mindset. I stand in awe of His continual redeeming love!

Father, may I be filled with the fullness of You and live out the rest of my days in Your embrace! Amen.

Perspectives in the Work Place

Work with enthusiasm, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Ephesians 6:7 New Living Translation

I enjoy my job. It is like none other that I have ever had. For a total of 15 years I taught lower elementary in several Christian schools. For 8 years I did assembly work in my home for a slogan button company. I have worked as a counselor in a Christian camp, supervised at a day camp, and even did some day care work. For the past two and a half years I have worked in an education warehouse….particularly in inventory control. Most of my day is spent on an order picker (see attached photo) whereby I check the quantity of products in locations.

Today’s verse allows me to do my job in a way that surpasses any other means of motivation. For I find that everything changes when I view it as being done for God. Working for Him gives my work significance, importance, and purpose. How in the world can I view a task done for Him as mundane, unessential, or demeaning? When I see God as my supervisor, employer, and inspector it affects my performance and the quality of my work. If I limit my service to just what people see and expect I will settle for less than my best.

My relationship with God carries over into my work place. It affects the way I interact with my coworkers. It affects my productivity. It affects the seriousness with which I do my job. God will set the standard higher than ANY person I work for. Far from being a task master, God provides me with the ability, strength, and desire to do what I do. His approval and pleasure means more to me than what my coworkers or bosses think. His opinion is what counts!

We make a big mistake when we label some jobs as “Christian service” and other jobs as “secular work.” Within the kingdom of God it is all the same. If it is done according to His will in faithfulness and sincerity it is godly ministry. My work becomes a means whereby I acknowledge and worship God on a daily basis.

Do I plan to work at this same place for the rest of my life? Not really. I have dreams and desires that God and I talk about quite often. But for now, He has a purpose for me in the place He has me. During this time He is instilling character and growth in me and I do not want to miss out on any lesson of life! It is my job, my ministry, my calling, and my place…for now.

Father, You instituted work from the beginning. May I always realize the truth that it is not what I do but Who I do it for that matters most! Amen.

Doing What He Says

Shimei then said to the king, “The word is good. As my lord the king has said, so your servant will do.” So Shimei lived in Jerusalem many days. I Kings 2:38 NASB

Shimei spoke these words to King Solomon. Each of us have the daily opportunity to speak the same words to God. For those of us who know Jesus as our Savior, we have the Holy Spirit dwelling within us. If we are willing to listen, He will whisper instructions to us. If we are willing to obey, He will empower us to do what He says. So what might those whispers sound like?

When I was a child, my siblings and I enjoyed playing a game called “I Spy.” One person would say “I spy something blue.” And the rest of us would proceed to guess at a variety of objects in the room that were blue until someone actually pinpointed what the person was spying. It kept us amused and busy to say the least! Well, in a sense, God has begun nudging me to be on the look out for certain things…three so far.

First, be on the look out for opportunities to defer to others. To put it another way, watch for ways to put others first. It is amazing how many times and places this becomes possible. At work, in traffic, in stores, in our homes! It becomes a joy to discover an opportunity and a delight to carry out the plan. What I found was with each success, I was asking God to help me see another one. No one around us knew we were doing this but God and I were having the time of our life!!!!

Second, be on the look out for the enemy’s presence. With God’s help I am becoming acutely aware of his tactics, finger prints, and attendance. What I am seeing is amazing me! Last night, something was said that rubbed me the wrong way. In the middle of my inner irritation and anger, God startled me with the realization that the enemy was in our midst. He was feeding me interpretations and thoughts that fueled my fire, and I was taking the bait…or plate rather! When I spied the enemy, his gig was up! All the anger in me left as he departed and what could have been a miserable evening turned into rejoicing!

Third, be on the look out for allowing God’s truth to take precedence and counter negative messages that run through my head. For instance, I get dressed, look in the mirror, and the first thought to hit me is “You have got to loose some weight.” But God’s truth needs to take precedence. I am fearfully and wonderfully made! When my hair won’t cooperate God’s truth is that my hair is my crown of beauty. He has a truth for EVERY thought to be battled and renounced.

There will be plenty of opportunities to voice Shimei’s words to God today. And to think He will supply the will, the way, and the success!

Father, my journey is one of daily interacting with You and there really is no better way to live! Amen.

The Necessity of Zero Tolerance

Neither give place to the devil. Ephesians 4:27 KJV

The tears are flowing as I write this devotional this morning. I am so moved by God’s desire and ability to get us to understand truth. His truth. How tainted our life becomes when we allow the enemy of our soul to distort, malign, misinterpret, and sabotage any of God’s truth. Truth about Himself, about us, and about others. Everything that comes into our life is fair game for his spin as far as he is concerned. He will stop at nothing to get us to see life through his grid of lies rather than God’s grid of truth. He will use things from our past (be it wounds, hurts, losses, disappointments), things from our present, and even imagined things from our future. His intent is to destroy us and God’s work through us.

I called a friend last night and we talked about how easily and persistently the enemy can get to us through negative thinking. I shared with her how the entire day had been spent fighting off the messages that just kept coming. As long as I came against the thoughts with Scripture and prayer I was okay. But by mid afternoon I gave place to him. One unguarded thought and the whirlwind hit! Everything I thought I had so effectively fought off came back with a vengeance. For I had simply been holding it at bay instead of enacting spiritual warfare. There is such a difference between those two things. The phone conversation helped me to see that.

When I do not take authority over the enemy and thoroughly demolish the strongholds and attacks, his fingerprints are all over the place. My life becomes chaotic with confusion, discouragement, hopelessness, and darkness. I become uncertain about God’s direction in my life and my devotion to Him. I question the authenticity of my journey. This thinking sets me up for the enemy’s well thought out plan. He begins to introduce me to options I can take. How dangerous it would be to take them.

I say all of this to remind myself and others of the necessity to be on guard. We cannot afford to give him the tiniest spot of opportunity to move in and set up residence in our thoughts, actions, words, or relationships. And if we have already given him that “place” we must take the steps to remove him. I experienced his glee of “victory” over me yesterday but today I “stand strong in the Lord and in the power of His might” (Ephesians 6:10).

Father, I bear some bruises from the enemy and am in need of Your balm of healing! Continue teaching me how to fight the good fight! Amen.