Friday, April 10, 2009

Disciplined Thinking


Therefore my disquieting thoughts make me respond, even because of my inward agitation. Job 20:2 (New American Standard Bible)


Zophar spoke these words to Job and I can relate all to well with what he is saying. Disquieting thoughts and inward agitation have been the culprits behind many downward turns on what should be pleasant, joy filled days and experiences. It seems to take mere seconds to go from a “top of the world” feeling to emotions full of disappointment, despair, and negativity. While I can often detect what triggers the shifts, I must admit I have not been victorious in the battle. I can so easily give in to the thoughts and that spells disaster every time.

God, the ever patient and present One, is continually helping me see things that are meant to lead to my eventual freedom. Yesterday, He gave me something to do. It was like He leaned over and whispered, “Try this! Focus on what you are doing at the moment. Direct your thoughts toward where you are, who you are, and what you are doing here and now.” Do you know what I found? When I purposefully set my mind on the task at hand my thoughts were not wandering off in other directions. I was no longer dwelling on past hurts and disappointments. I was no longer fantasizing about the way I wanted things to be. I was no longer filled with anxious thoughts or confusing mental conversations. I was at peace and contentment was marking the moments.

This is new for me because I have spent most of my life with a wandering mind and the trips I would take were usually futile, frustrating, and unhelpful. They prevented me from really knowing myself and appreciating where God had me at the moment. They hindered me from fully enjoying the people in my life and the present blessings God was graciously bestowing upon me.

As with any discipline I wish to develop in my life, this one will take time. It requires constantly bringing myself back “home” in my thoughts. Exercises for me will include, listening to a song and seeing how long I can stay focused on the words and music. Taking a walk and seeing how many signs of spring I can detect. Talking with a friend and taking in every word they say. At times, it may even require just speaking out loud what it is I am doing and where I am at. As much time as I have practiced wrong thinking, I must now devote to right thinking. Purposeful thinking. Focused thinking. Determined thinking. I choose to control the thoughts that have for too long controlled me. By God’s grace I will do it!

Father, keep drawing me back to the present. Help my mind to stay fixed on You and the life you have given me to live each moment of each day. Amen.

I Just Want to Be Where You Are - Don Moen
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrBYbjSg3kA&feature=related

May each of you have a wonderful Easter weekend celebrating the death, burial, and resurrection of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. How I joy in all that God is resurrecting in each of us.