Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Making the Exchange


To comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion ~ to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. Isaiah 61:2,3 (NIV)

I love the exchanges God is longing to make with us. He is offering us amazing things but so often I find myself unwilling to make the switch. I want the comfort, beauty, gladness, and praise but find myself hesitant to give up the mourning, ashes, and despair. As uncomfortable as they are, as miserable as they make me feel, and as draining as they can be, I still manage to hold on to them for the “treasures” they have become to me. I have learned to embrace them because they are so familiar to me.

So what does my loving heavenly Father do? He waits. He allows me to hold on to my thoughts, feelings, and emotions until the pain becomes so great that I RUN to Him for the exchange. He knows that I will not relinquish that which has me in bondage until I have squeezed out the last bit of distorted pleasure I can find in it. He gently woos me to Himself but knows that my heart will not seek Him with abandon until the discomfort of my mindset and choices becomes unbearable. How gracious He is! How resistant I can be.

This morning I made some long over due exchanges. What I gave to Him was so pathetic compared to what He gave to me. But He tenderly accepted my feelings of anger, hurt, rejection, loneliness, confusion, frustration, unforgiveness, bitterness, and resentment. As I placed every worthless feeling that had been consuming me into His receptive hands, He gave me the gifts of peace, satisfaction, and joy I was wanting all along. Oh, I have asked for those things many times but God will never put His gifts into hands that are filled with other things. My heart can only hold on to one thing at a time. Until I give to Him what I am grasping and clinging to, He has no choice but to keep His gift to Himself. It is kept safe and available for when I am ready to make the exchange.

I stand in awe of His work. I stand amazed at how easily I block Him. I praise Him that He never gives up on me. As Kathy Troccoli so eloquently sings, “It’s His stubborn love that never lets go of me!”

Father, You have waited for this moment and Your generosity fills my heart with gratitude and my eyes with tears. Thank you! Amen.