Hearing the Invitation

But I am poor and needy; yet the LORD thinks upon me. You are my help and my deliverer; do not delay, O my God. Psalm 40:17 (New King James Version)

My ability to see God as my help and deliverer begins with the realization of my neediness and bondage. Until I see the truth of my mindsets and internal world I will not see the necessity of allowing God to come to my aid. As long as I walk in independence of Him I will not be able to establish my dependence on Him. These truths became clear to me one morning as I journaled a note to myself and began to see the extent of my own neediness and God’s extravagant offer of fulfillment. What follows is a look into the first of many steps toward freedom for me. With tears and timidity I wrote:

You do not like feelings of loneliness and insignificance. When they come you seek to anesthetize them through contact with people. Although a phone call or good email will relieve you for a moment the feelings stay hidden in the shadows only to resurface a short time later. Let them be what draw you to God for comfort and company. Each can be an opportunity to cry out to Him for His filling and presence. God desires to fill you with an awareness of His deep love. You have yet to fully embrace that truth and live out of its experience. That is why you are still looking to other sources. All your desire for affection, attention, affirmation, encouragement, and security is legitimate but the way you go about attempting to receive it all is where the problem lies. Allow God to show you His availability and capability to be your All in All. Allow Him to be the One to nurture and protect you. Receive your true identity from Christ. This is not a matter of success versus failure. It is a process! You live in a fallen world and possess a fallen nature, therefore you will always be in need of Him. The deepest places in you need His touch. Open yourself up to receive all He longs to give you on a daily basis. Don’t feel that because you still experience these feelings and longings that you aren’t “getting it.” You have spent so many years looking to substitutes that looking to God needs to be learned and experienced. Whether it is every 5 minutes or every hour keep pressing in to Him. Keep looking to Him. Keep resting in Him. Let Him saturate your entire being so that relationships can be a joy rather than an attempt to get your needs met. Value the ones who are in your life at the present. Relate to them out of your relationship with your Father. You are precious in His sight and He will complete the work He has started in you. He is wooing you to Himself even now. Reach out and receive all that He extends to you. Accept His invitation to be completely loved by Him.

I had to ask myself, “How do I refuse an offer like that?” I am finding that not only does God extend such a radical invitation to me, He does amazing things when I dare to take Him up on it. As I am learning to look to Him for comfort and direction, I am able to let my friends off the hook for being primary need meeters in my life. To God be the glory because without Him THAT would never have happened.

Father, I never rested long enough to hear Your words of invitation to me. I now turn to You to find what no one else could supply for me. Amen.