Wrong Focus

Who am I, that I should go unto Pharaoh, and that I should bring forth the children of Israel out of Egypt? Exodus 3:11 (KJV)

I find it interesting that Moses’ questions and doubts to God’s call on his life all center around his view of himself. He questions his own identity and significance. His words are spoken with a tone of regret, resignation, and impossibility. He somehow struggles to feel qualified due to murder in his past and 40 years of ‘backside of the desert’ dwelling. He cannot see himself as a deliverer much less as a leader. If left to himself, his answer to the question of “who am I” becomes “I am an undeserving nobody.”

Not only does he struggle with his identity, but he questions whether or not people will accept God’s call on his life. He wonders if they will be convinced God really sent him. Will they listen to him and follow him? Will they raise objections that he cannot answer? His perception of what ‘might’ happen intimidates him.

As if those two giants of reasoning are not enough, Moses adds yet another hindrance to his ability to accept God’s call and move forward with boldness. His personal limitations. God’s call required proficiency in speech and that was not one of his strengths. Inferiority leaves him with a sense that he could never be successful at the very thing God has chosen for him.

Identity, intimidation, and inferiority is what became his focus and thus he himself became his own obstacle to overcome. Each one can be crippling in themselves and overwhelming when combined together. God’s answer? “I have chosen you, I have gifted you, and I control the outcome of the very things I will lead you into. It all rests on My shoulders. Cooperate with Me, trust Me, and be available to Me. You are My choice for this venture and I will not fail you.”

It is imperative that I allow God to speak the same things to my heart. He longs for me to take the focus off myself and what I perceive I am able or unable to do for Him, and see Him as the God of the impossible. My Christian life must be such that I trust Him, follow His step by step instructions, and agree with Him along the way. Identity is found in Him. Intimidation and inferiority must bow to His presence and power.

Father, like Moses, I have often had the wrong focus. Help me to see You, hear You, believe You, and follow You with abandon. Amen.

Voicing the Questions

And when the LORD saw that he turned aside to see, God called unto him out of the midst of the bush, and said, Moses, Moses. And he said, Here am I. Exodus 3:4 (KJV)

This verse gives way to one of the most intriguing exchange of words found in Scripture. Moses’ questions reveal a lot about his thoughts, heart, and view of life. God’s answers reveal a lot about His person, presence, and power. I am struck by the candidness, honesty, and transparency of a man struggling to realize God actually has a call on his life and a desire to use him. While his dream of helping his people died long ago and he settled into what he thought he would end up doing with the rest of his life, God is intent on showing Moses that He has not forgotten him, given up on him, or abandoned him. He has simply spent the first 80 years of his life preparing him for a destiny of great proportion. I listen in as Moses questions his identity, exposes his fears, focuses on his limitations, and tries to convince God that He is choosing the wrong person to display His glory, fulfill His dreams, and carry out His plan.

How often I have believed the lies of the enemy and lost hope in ever having a realization of God’s purpose and involvement in my own life. Moses’ questions give voice to my own internal battles. His words somehow give me the courage to look deep within myself and begin to admit the things that hinder me from embracing the truth that God really does have something for me to do in His kingdom work. They reveal to me where I stand in doubt, fear, suspicion, and resignation. But that is only half of the story.

God’s responses are meant to fill me with hope, realign my belief with His Word, and give me the ability to join Him in all that He purposed for me before the foundations of the world. They are meant to free me from feelings of insignificance, thoughts of unworthiness, and attention on impossibilities.

I invite you to join me as I dig deeper into this conversation between God and Moses that was meant for our ears as well. It was meant to quiet our fears, strengthen our resolve, and renew our hope that God has not yet written the last chapter of our life in Him.

Father, I join Moses in his quest to get his questions answered by You. I am finally prepared to hear answers that will astound me. Amen.

Expressing a Need

Then saith he unto them, My soul is exceeding sorrowful, even unto death; tarry ye here, and watch with me. Matthew 26:38 (KJV)

I am trying to recall times in Scripture when Jesus voiced a need to others. Asking the Samaritan woman for a drink of water at a well was one rare example. Usually it was Jesus listening to, observing, and meeting the needs of the multitudes. Many were the times He slipped off into solitude with His heavenly Father while others slept. We do not read of times where He sought the companionship and ears of friends. Even He said He had not come to be served but to serve. Occasionally we read of people ministering to Him in profound ways. But I am struck by the rarity that Jesus ever made His personal needs known.

What a contrast I find in Matthew 26:38. Overwhelmed with sorrow and deeply grieved He requests the company and understanding sympathy of three disciples….His closest inner circle of friends. He was asking them to invest themselves in His life by entering into His personal suffering. He longed for them to accompany Him as He entered His valley of death. Yet He knew that even as He voiced His need, they would soon give way to sleep. Grief is made even more profound when loneliness is added to it.

How we ache for someone to walk with us through the difficulties of life. We want their attention, empathy, understanding, support, presence, and shoulder. We want to feel their arm around us and to hear their words of comfort and assurance. We draw a certain amount of strength because they walk beside us. I have known such individuals and I thank God for each one of them. I also know the heartache when individuals were unable or unwilling to provide me with such gifts. I just as quickly recall giving or withholding the things others needed from me.

The longer I am on this journey with God, the more I realize He is the One to whom I must look to “tarry and watch” with me. As a matter of fact, it has been His desire all along. For He alone knows the depth of my particular sorrow and He alone is fully able to enter into that sorrow with me. My expressed need will never be met with disinterest, distraction, or sleep. What He sought from His disciples in the garden is what He graciously offers to me.

Father, I marvel that You meet my heartache and sorrow with such compassion, warmth, and availability. May I be like You. Amen.

The Mindset of a Pretender

Then Judas, which betrayed him, answered and said, Master, is it I? He said unto him, Thou hast said. Matthew 26:26 (KJV)

I read Judas’ question to Jesus and I am struck by the blatant mode of “masking” he is living. Judas is asking this question AFTER he has already visited the chief priests (Jesus’ greatest human rivals), offered to help them capture him, agreed to a price of thirty pieces of silver, and began looking for an opportunity to carry out the betrayal. Everything has been set in motion for the most heartless, devious betrayal of all time. Judas knows what he is doing and still voices a question to the very One he is betraying and the very One who knows he is doing it. What I am asking myself is “why?” Why is Judas asking a question he already knows the answer to?

Could it be he wants to know if Jesus is aware of his thoughts, actions, and secrets? Or could it be he wants to continue his masquerade within the company of the other disciples? Jesus could not be fooled. He saw right through the hidden agendas, false motives, and hypocrisy of the religious leaders of His day. And He saw right through Judas. As God, He was present when Judas met with the chief priests and He was aware of his search for the right moment of betrayal. Nothing escapes His knowledge, awareness, or eye.

So it is the second possibility that has my attention this morning. While Jesus cannot be fooled, people are another story. Judas would continue to embrace his self-deception with his desire to keep the truth hidden from the people in his life. He was pretty good at it too, because his closest friends never realized the truth about him until his kiss of betrayal took place in the garden. He indeed had them all fooled until the very end.

I wonder how many Christians will live with a Judas mentality today? While they realize God is not being fooled, they continue playing a game of pretend to their family, friends, co-workers, and congregation. They derive some sense of safety and satisfaction that no one knows what they are really like. Addictions, strongholds, and sins have remained hidden behind masks of worship, service, and good outward behavior. God is calling them to a life of authenticity and will help them find it, but they are resisting. Oh, that they would not play their game until the end. How tragic that would be!

Father, it is sobering to think one could live with such a mindset. May I be honest with You, others, and myself each day. Cloak me in truth. Amen.

Ears to Hear

He that hath ears to hear, let him hear. Luke 14:35 (KJV)

While here on earth, Jesus spoke many things to many people, but He knew not everyone would take in His words. He referenced this when He used the phrase “ears to hear.” He was not talking about the ability to hear sound. Anyone within the range of His voice could master that. What He was referring to had more to do with comprehending, acknowledging, embracing, and understanding what He was saying. Some would hear what He had to say and walk away unmoved and unchanged. Others would be a captive audience to Him and walk away forever changed. It would show up in their words, actions, and thoughts later on. The fruit would be evident.

Many people will sit in church tomorrow and there will be a variety of ear types. They will sit within hearing range of a minister’s voice but all will not really hear what he is saying much less what God is saying through Him. Distractions may abound in their head and the message will become a muffled sound to their ears. Some will not have the ability to take in the truths of what is being said because they have never had a spiritual opening of their ears by the Holy Spirit. They have never trusted Christ as their Savior and therefore remain spiritually deaf. Some will have issues with their pastor and refuse to believe God would ever have anything to say through him. Some will have such a distorted view of God that they long ago gave up hope that He would have anything to say to them directly. Some, through boredom, rebellion, or pride, stopped listening all together. Each lacks the ears to hear. They will walk away having not listened to or learned what God was so anxious to tell them.

Then there are those who will attend church tomorrow with ears anxious to hear God’s voice to them, because it is a daily practice for them already. Each time they open His Word, read a book, listen to a speaker, or hear a song, they ask God to speak to them through it. Their heart cry becomes, “Give me ears to hear you, Lord!” They are attentive and attuned to what He wants to tell them. The conversations are powerful, personal, and profound. Each of us have the opportunity to possess ears to hear. We must simply ask for them and then start listening!

Father, my ears need a touch from You each day. I want ears to hear and a heart that is receptive to all that You desire to tell me. May my face light up every time I know it is Your voice I am hearing. Amen.

The Point of Entry

Enter thou into the joy of thy lord. Matthew 25:21b (KJV)

I am learning to hear God’s invitations to me. They are inclusive, extravagant, and lavish. I use to miss them when the words of God never seemed to leave the pages of Scripture and enter my heart. How easy it was to read this verse from Matthew and think it was only meant for the ears of the faithful servants who showed good stewardship. The invitation was for them, the joy was for them, and the closeness was for them. I did not know how to approach Scripture as anything other than an outsider. I was an observer rather than a participant. The words had no meaning for me. My lack of connection to the Bible was due to my not having an intimate connection with its Author. As my daily relationship with God changed it affected my approach to His Word.

Was I saved? Absolutely. But my spiritual life was limited to my interactions with people rather than with my heavenly Father. Rather than going to Him directly I looked to people to tell me about Him. Mine was a faith that was mostly built on the opinions and experiences of others. I couldn’t seem to hear what He wanted to tell me directly. There is no joy in that kind of Christianity. It becomes a life of neediness and continual searching.

But oh the joy that comes when props are kicked out from under you, securities are removed, and you find yourself alone with God. Entering into His joy is an invitation to join Him. Partner with Him. It is no longer being satisfied to let others nourish you by feeding off their plates. Instead it is learning to meet with Him one on one. It involves trust, obedience, submission, and conformity. It is a oneness that cannot be fully described.

Entering in means closeness and drawing near. It means participating in the same activities. Laying aside my own agendas in favor of God’s agendas. It means aligning my passions with His. Each morning the invitation is given anew and I must choose whether or not I will accept it. May I see the delight in His eyes and hear the love in His voice as He once again asks, “Will you join Me?”

Father, thank you for opening my ears so I could finally hear Your voice. I do not know what You have planned for today but I choose to join You for whatever that would be. I am ready to share in Your happiness. Amen.

Necessary Awareness

Jesus knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he was come from God, and went to God. John 13:3 (KJV)

I have recently watched a couple episodes of American Idol. One thing stands out to me above all other things with that show. It is the misdirected trust the contestants place in the hands of the judges. They not only come with their dreams to succeed, they build their identity, worth, and value on what those judges think of them.

I ache for them because they remind me of myself and all the times I have looked to people to tell me who I was and what I was worth. Their opinion of me became the determining factor of how I viewed myself. I had yet to learn what Jesus knew! His total identity was found in the relationship He had with His Father. He knew that every thing in His life passed from His Father’s hands to His hands…..the joys as well as the sorrows. He knew where He came from and where He was going. Nothing in this life could take away or add to what He knew to be true.

I have found there is only one way for God to instill that kind of knowledge in me. It is in drawing me aside in solitude with Himself. He has spent the last year removing anything or anyone from my life that would hinder me from knowing Him and hence knowing who I really am. He knew what I was clinging to for security, identity, assurance, significance, and belonging. As He would purposefully pry each idol from my closed hands I responded with tears, fear, and dejection. I did not understand why He was doing what He was doing….until now. His ways seemed harsh and unloving at the time. But I have finally come to realize His desire all along was to get me to look to Him, know Him, and embrace Him. That is not possible if anything else stands in the way, has my attention, or holds my heart. He was simply clearing the way so we could finally be together.

I am still in a wilderness place with Him but I am beginning to see signs of life, evidence of growth, and the reality of His presence. My tears are being replaced with joy, my fears are being replaced with confidence, and my loneliness is being replaced with His companionship.

Father, You give and You take away in love. Continue to remove any thing from my life that distracts me from knowing You. I open my hands to release any thing or any one I am holding on to in place of You. Amen.