Seeing Where the Problem Lies

Call the Sabbath a delight, the holy day of the LORD honorable, and honor it, desisting from your own ways, from seeking your own pleasure, and speaking your own word, then you will take delight in the LORD. Isaiah 58:13, 14

Ever feel like God wasn’t hearing you, speaking to you, or moving on your behalf? Your prayers seem to be just words, your spirit goes unmoved, and God seems distant? I’ve been there and it is never fun. Maybe some of you can relate with what I am about to share.

About a month ago something happened in a relationship that sent me reeling. I could not begin to list the number of emotions that hit me all at once. The hurt was deep, the fear was incredible, and the battle was on. I could not shake it. I tried all the things I thought would work. I stayed in the Word, cried out to God, spoke the truth to replace lies, reminded myself that God’s hand was in all of it, confessed my idolatry, and clung to God’s hand with everything in me. But the whole time, my soul seemed dark, my spirit remained low, and I could not seem to move forward on my journey. I would have a few moments of relief in my day but would eventually spiral back down. I thought with time I would just get over it. God knew better.

I went for a walk last night and spent the first 15 minutes in silence. Neither God nor I spoke. It was horrible. I was miserable. Then I asked God to show me what it was that was blocking me from hearing Him, feeling close to Him, and moving past my situation. He wasted no time in revealing the problem. I saw clearly for the first time that I had become bitter. A root of bitterness had taken hold and it was growing quickly.

Freedom came and joy followed when tears flowed out of repentance and brokenness. The acknowledgement and confession of my own bitterness was the key to God removing what had been growing in me. I woke this morning without the pain, sorrow, and disappointment that has consumed me for the past month. Imagine a boat tied to a dock. The motor is full throttle, water is splashing all over the place, the noise is extreme, but the boat is going no where. I was that boat and my bitterness was the rope. Confession cut the line and I am moving forward! Praise God!!!!

Did God change my circumstance? No. He changed me!

Father, You have set this captive free and I am ecstatic! Amen!