A Place to Cry

You will weep no longer. He will surely be gracious to you at the sound of your cry; when He hears it, He will answer you. Isaiah 30:19 (New American Standard Bible)

Trials, heartaches, loss, betrayal, disappointment, and rejection are the very things that bring us to tears. Some would rather die than let someone see them cry. This can be for a variety of reasons but I suspect a leading reason is because of how their tears were received when they were younger.

A negative response to one's tears can embed lies in their minds. It did not matter if pain was the factor, deep hurt was the culprit, or any other scenario whereby tears were appropriate. Instead of comfort they received scorn. Instead of being embraced, they were sent away to their room. Instead of compassion, they found cold hearts.

I am not a person who shows emotion easily. When I am hurting or struggling I tend to get quiet and find a way to avoid conversation as well as eye contact. When asked how I am I can easily respond with “fine” and look for ways to change the subject. As God leads individuals into my life I am slowly learning to open up and take the “risk” of sharing. Each time I do, the hindrances seem to lessen, as do my fears that I will become a burden to others or they will walk away when my feelings and thoughts are exposed. This is possible when the heart of Jesus is felt through others. They help me to more clearly see His words that say, “I will never leave you or forsake you.”

There use to be a time (not too long ago) when tears made me feel uncomfortable and vulnerable. I felt uneasy letting anyone know I was hurting THAT much. What changed? I learned that tears were beneficial. I learned that people weren't as uncomfortable with my tears as I thought. But above all, I learned my tears touch the heart of God and stir Him to action. When I cry over loss, hurt, or fear, it is His comfort I now seek. I want to feel his embrace and hear His words of comfort whispered in my ear. I have a dear friend who can put her arms around me and speak words of comfort to me in amazing ways. That has become my picture of what my loving, heavenly Father is like as well.

I find assurance that my cries do not fall on deaf ears, a cold heart, closed eyes, or folded arms. During the greatest losses and pains of my life, His shoulder has been the one I could always bury my face in until my tears and energy were both spent. The comfort and compassion He gives goes beyond even that of my dearest friends.

Father, one day You will wipe away all my tears, but until then You will allow me to cry on Your shoulder as You gently wipe my present tears. You know the reason each one falls. Amen.

Contending With the Giants

For what I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate. Romans 7:15 (New American Standard Bible)

We are not told what Paul’s actual struggles consisted of but whenever I read Romans 7, I can relate with what he is saying. There are times I want to just throw up my hands and say, “God, I do not understand myself!” Just when I think I have a certain area under control or mastered it rears its ugly head and shows me it is very much alive and well. Tonight I realized and admitted the existence of sleeping giants within me. They seem to sleep soundly until something arouses them and then the battle begins.

For me, the giants consist of feelings of shame, vulnerability, insignificance, and confusion. What awakens them are moments of disappointment, loneliness, unmet needs, and crushed expectations. Seeing them as giants and seeing what awakens them has helped me to finally fight them the same way David fought Goliath……come against them in the strength of the Lord. Use His Word and truth as my weapons. I don’t have to let their presence scare me or throw me off balance anymore.

I know when a tendency in me has died or been transformed by the power of God and I also know when that is far from the case. It use to send me reeling to see that I would have to contend with certain things on an on going basis……..maybe for the rest of my life. The simple truth is that I possess a sin nature, live in a fallen world, and will always have giants to face. David once again becomes my example. He fought Goliath ONCE and it was over, but he spent years running from King Saul. Either way, God gave continual victory.

My hope is renewed by these truths. I am not a basket case nor am I a lost cause. I am simply a child of God who must continue to take the stance of a warrior and face the battles as they come. As long as I stay honest and open with God and use the war tactics and armor He has provided for me I will be triumphant.

Father, there are times I am not sure I am doing things right and then You come along with the wisdom, counsel, and direction I need. I praise You! Amen.

In Weakness and Weariness

He gives strength to the weary, and to him who lacks might He increases power. Isaiah 40:29 (New American Standard Bible)

I have several devotional books that are written as if Jesus is doing the talking. They are part of my spiritual sustenance each morning and never fail to speak works I long to hear. This morning was no exception as I opened the book Jesus Calling and read, My power flows most freely into weak ones aware of their need for Me. Faltering steps of dependence are not lack of faith; they are links to my Presence.

It took years for me to understand and embrace Jesus’ invitation when He said, “Come to Me all of you who are weary and heavy laden.” Weariness has the idea of being fatigued or exhausted due to wearisome effort. Jesus is saying, “When you have reached that point, come to Me. When you have exhausted your means, your strength, your initiative, your ability, your stamina, your determination, come to Me. I will give you strength. I will increase your power. I will give you the ability to recover and collect that strength and power.”

What I had to realize is that Jesus is not repulsed by my weakness and weariness. They are the very things that He uses to show me my own need of Him. He is continually inviting me to live my life out of interaction with Him whereby I see my need and bring it to Him. This is not just physical needs. It is ANY need, whether that means physical, spiritual, emotional, mental, or social. What I cannot muster up on my own or receive from another person is what I need to look to Him for. The more I do that the less I will be desiring to find it in myself or others.

Living my Christian life with the attitude that I must present to God a perfected, strong, stable, boundless façade, is a pretense that has disastrous results. Any time I refuse to admit the truth about myself and what is really going on inside of me and refuse to bring all of it to the One who loves me and wants to help me, I am in trouble.

Change has come as I have begun to see God’s loving heart and my needy heart. The biggest issue He has had to walk me through has been in the area of emotional dependency. As painful as it was for me to see myself so raw, so broken, and so needy, it has been a time of knowing God like I have never known Him. Admitting the truth about myself has opened the door to seeing the truth about God. I am in awe!

Father, I am learning to stand before You stripped of all pretense and self-imposed improvements. Your receiving of me as I am is precious and powerful. I love You! Amen.

When Change Did Not Come

Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17 (King James Version)

It’s true! When I accepted Christ as my Savior at the age of 14, many things changed for me. I became a child of God, I became aware of my sin and that each sin was against Him, I began reading the Bible, I desired to be with Christians, I attended church, my ideas and goals changed, and I basically started on a different road. Yet, over the years and even decades, I had to admit that many other things had not changed. I still housed attitudes, addictions, and mindsets that were far from new. They were STILL a part of me. I believe I missed something that many others are also missing.

I often read 2 Corinthians 5:17 and saw my “being in Christ” as merely my salvation experience and wondered why I had yet to see all the old things passing away and all the new things coming my way. It wasn’t a matter of just giving it enough time. It was a matter of there not being deep change beyond behavior modification and grit. Jesus’ words of “My yoke is easy and My burden is light seemed to be far removed from my experience. The changes I needed had to come from God and for some reason they weren’t coming…until recently!

What was the difference? I had to see 2 Corinthians 5:17 along side of John 15:1-11, where Jesus makes the statement, “Abide in Me.” To abide means to remain as one, not depart, be present, be held, to wait for and upon. Basically it has the idea of intimate connection. THAT is not the way I lived most of my Christian life and hence saw little internal change. As I have experienced connecting with God on a daily basis I have begun to see Him change me in some profound areas of my life. I have seen Him break addictions I had to food and people. I have seen Him revolutionize my family life and my marriage. I have seen Him redirect my focus.

I am daily becoming a different person and catching the first glimpses of the abundant life Jesus spoke of in John 15. What I found was that being in Christ for salvation is a one time decision. Being in Christ for a way of life is a daily, moment by moment decision and adventure. It is something I often heard others speak or write of, but failed to possess for myself. That has begun to change and actually started a couple weeks ago when I set a number of things aside for one week and turned my attention and my heart toward a God who continues to draw me to Himself.

Father, I have no doubt that the changes I am seeing are coming from You. I praise You for them and look for more because You are desirous to do more. Amen.

The One Who is For Me

This I know that, God is for me. Psalm 56:9 (New American Standard Bible)

This phrase needs to become a banner I carry with me through out each day. To realize that above every situation, relationship, and circumstance God is for me! I need this reminder today. I need it to make its way to the very center of my being. It has to be more than words on a page to me. It has to be what gives me life, assurance, and comfort.

As the Romans 8:31 says, “If God be for us, who can be against us?” Romans 8 is a chapter that is filled with ways God is for us. He doesn’t condemn us. He sets us free. He sent His Son to be our offering for sin. He has given us His Spirit. He gives us life and peace. He claims us as His own. He leads us by His Spirit. He is our Abba Father and calls us His children. He makes us His heirs. He adopts and redeems us. He helps us in our weaknesses. He prays and intercedes for us. He works all things for good. He calls us for His purposes. He knows us thoroughly and is conforming us to the image of His Son. He justifies and glorifies us. Any and all that would be against us surely fades in comparison to God being for us.

Ephesians 6 lists the armor I am to put on and when it says to pick up my sword, which is the Word of God, this list from Romans 8 is part of my sword. When thoughts of condemnation begin to circle, THIS list is what I can use against them. When relationships are not what I want them to be, THIS list is what will comfort me. When life gets messy, THIS list is what can bring calm to my internal world. When the enemy mocks me with my own failures, THIS list can silence him. When my mind takes trips down wrong paths and into dark pits, THIS list is what can get me back on the right path and walking in the light once again.

For too many years I could read God’s Word but fail to apply it to my every day life. I am learning how to do that now and it is making a difference. While there are still times I fail and don’t get it right, there are also moments of victory and growth that I praise God for. He and I both know I will not reach perfection in this life time, but together we celebrate the triumphs and progress.

I don’t know what others are facing who read these words today, but I am confident they are meant to encourage you and give you a life line of hope. Time and time again, God has assured me the messages are meant for myself and others. They are meant for you!

Father, of all that I have read this morning from Your Word and various books, THIS was Your message for me today. What a gift! What a precious God You are to me! Amen.

It Will Be Well

Tell the righteous it will be well with them, for they will enjoy the fruit of their deeds. Isaiah 3:10 (New International Version)

Words hold such power. God used words to speak creation into existence. Each day we are given the opportunity to breathe life or death into situations. God would desire us to be a verbal encouragement to those we come into contact with.

At times, we wonder if what we are doing really matters. Is it making a difference in anyone’s life? It is easy to get discouraged when we do not see results immediately or try as we may difficulties still find their way into our life.

Imagine yourself running a race. Along the way spectators call out to you words of encouragement meant to spur you on to finish the race. Words have a way of snapping us back to reality.

The truth of the matter is God’s principle of reaping and sowing is still in place today. “It will be well” is a promise made by God to those who chose to follow Him. They are words we must learn to speak to ourselves and to others. No matter what the circumstances are right now, IT WILL BE WELL. No matter what grim news has just been delivered to you, IT WILL BE WELL. No matter what loss you have just sustained, IT WILL BE WELL. No matter what your finances look like presently, IT WILL BE WELL.

For the righteous (just, lawful) those words are meant to inspire, encourage, sustain, rejuvenate, motivate, and renew. We must not let the things we can see, hear, feel, and experience diminish the promise made from our Father’s mouth to our heart.

Today when you begin to doubt, fear, or become discouraged let the phrase “it will be well” become your mantra. Count on it as surely as anything else. Think of it this way. In the midst of it all, God leans over, takes your head in His hands, and whispers into your ear, “ I know it is hard right now. I know you are hurting and the way has gotten painful. But I give you My word. This is all going to end well. I promise!”

Father, cause Your words to take root in me. They are not only spoken in love but they will be accomplished. Amen.

Finding It In Him

You will make known to me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy; in Your right hand there are pleasures forever. Psalm 16:11 (New American Standard Bible)

I see three things in this verse that I very much want in my own life and so does God. They are God’s direction, fullness of joy, and pleasures forevermore. What a far cry from those qualities that use to be prevalent in my mind when I thought of what God intended for me! Something is wrong when more attention is given to outward show rather than what is going on internally.

For years I could not figure out why standards, rules, and areas of separation seemed to be my main focus and that of other believers. Then it dawned on me it was because they were so assessable. It was easier to compare myself with another person’s actions and I could always find someone who didn’t quite measure up to my “spirituality.” But the heart is another matter. That is a place that cannot be compared to another person. That is the place where God alone sees all. And that is the place from where the outward behavior must stem. No wonder God said that those who compare themselves among themselves are not wise. Comparisons in that way do not please Him. Honesty in the inward parts does!

If I see one capsule theme for this verse it is found in the word presence. That word epitomizes cherished fellowship, undivided attention, genuine love, and a desire to be close. When those words characterize our walk with God we will be the recipients of direction, joy, and pleasure in abundant and ongoing measures! But far too often we look to people to give us what we long for instead of going to the only true Source.

The best thing that ever happened in my Christian life was when God began to direct me to people who in turn pointed me back to Him as my source for those things. It followed decades of thinking I would be alright if I could just bond with the right person. Time and time again I found they could not give me what I craved the most, in the amounts I wanted, and at the constant level I wanted it. It was like standing near a sprinkler with a cup in hand trying to catch a few drops of water to quench my thirst. When all the while the Fountain of Living Water beaconed me to come to Him.

It took a long time for me to realize my problem was not that I had needs. My problem was where I looked to have the needs met and satisfied. For me, it was in relationships with Christians whom I most admired and wanted to be like. God had to show me He was the One for me to look to and He wanted to bring out the uniqueness of who He created me to be. Am I still learning? You bet! But I treasure the journey I am on to find Him as my All in All.

Father, I did not always know it was You I needed. Not just for eternal life but for abundant life. Quench my deepest thirst with Yourself. Amen.

God-guided Conversations

Nathan then said to David, "You are the man!” 2 Samuel 12:7 (New American Standard Bible)

The prophet, Nathan, was sent to David with a specific message concerning David’s sin. For close to a year, David harbored a “secret” of great proportion. He had committed adultery as well as murder. As far as he was concerned, no one but Bathsheba knew of the adultery. The murder was not even known by her. Nathan was used of God to pinpoint those very things to David. He had no trouble determining that Nathan had been sent to him by God with a message meant for his ears and David’s response was Psalm 51.

While I have never had the experience of having a person sent to me to reveal a “hidden” sin, I have known what it was like to talk with someone and have them pinpoint an area in my life that God was dealing with. Yesterday, I went to talk with a friend. We had set up a time for this talk and yet I wasn’t sure what we were going to talk about. She has been helping me wade through some issues but none of those issues were needing to be discussed. On the way to her house I simply asked God to guide our conversation. THAT is exactly what He did.

We talked for about thirty minutes on various things and then the conversation took a turn. Within moments she brought up a subject that God had been dealing with me in and she had NO idea the hugeness of it. As a matter of fact, as she began to pinpoint this area she wasn’t sure how I was going to receive her words but knew instinctively that she was to say what she said. I was receptive but stunned at the realization that THIS was going to be our God-guided conversation. I saw both the message and the messenger as being from Him and that made it easier to receive what was being said. Her coffee table became an altar of prayer for us and I walked away shaking my head in amazement at how God works. Last year another person had tried to tell me the same things but it has taken this long for me to finally be receptive. God has been graciously patient.

I count it precious that He would carve out a time for a conversation in order to once again target a place of needed change in my life. I now head into a new week with a sense of expectancy over what He will be doing to bring about that change. He has already promised me the grace to walk in obedience and given me the desire to do it. Since I know that His ways and thoughts are higher than my own, I know the end of this story is bound to be amazing!

Father, You have spoken clearly to me through the mouth of a friend….AGAIN. I thank you for the message given and Your presence that goes with me into this area of change. Amen.

Faith or Fear?

All the peoples, nations and men of every language fell down and worshiped the golden image that Nebuchadnezzar the king had set up. Daniel 3:7 (New International Version)

We were created in the image of God and part of that creation is the ability and desire to worship. As I read the book of Daniel I ask myself what would cause so many people to bow down to a statue? Was it the realization that this statue cared for them, created them, and deserved their worship? Was it the belief that this statue could protect them, bless them, and love them? Were they able to ascribe power, wisdom, and majesty to this statue? Was their worship out of faith, passion, and truth? The answer to all these questions is “no.” Their worship was driven and displayed by one source……fear.

Nebuchadnezzar used the one thing that he knew would control others. He threatened them with being thrown into a furnace of blazing fire if they did not bow down and worship the image of his creation. He was not interested in their heart but rather their conformity. Driven by pride and an ever growing ego, he knew the right buttons to push and for the most part it worked.

Oh, how different our worship of God should be. God desires our worship of Him to be out of faith not fear. Love not dread. Passion not apathy. To see God’s character and proclaim praise to Him because of it is at the heart of true worship. It is not an outward posturing but rather an inward prostrating of ourselves before a righteous, holy, loving, powerful, and compassionate God. That is not possible outside of having a daily intimate, personal walk with Him. Knowing Him and being known by Him is what opens the door for true worship.

How I missed that realization for decades. Reducing my walk with Him to an impersonal list of does and don’ts, harboring judgmental attitudes toward others, modifying my behavior while neglecting my heart, performing rather than praising, all kept me at arms length from a God who longed to draw me close. Like the people of Nebuchadnezzar’s day I knew what it was like to live a fearful Christian life. Fearful of other’s opinions and the consequences of their displeasure. But with faith came freedom.

Father, You delivered me from the fear that kept me from really knowing and worshiping You. I now bow to You for the right reasons. Amen.

Necessary Conversations

Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. James 5:16 (King James Version)

I use to read this verse and limit it to simply admitting my sin to others. This morning the Lord is broadening the scope for me and helping me to see that faults include sins, weaknesses, deviation from truth, skewed thinking, and a host of other things I can so easily keep to myself. My healing and wholeness is dependent upon not only walking in honesty with God but also in honesty with others. Willingly being open, authentic, transparent, and vulnerable with individuals whom God is using in my life. It is not His intent that I become an “open book” to every person I meet, but rather to learn to confide in the ones who are God’s safety net for me.

At one time I would have thought I already do that, but recently God has shown me where I still have the tendency to be selective in what I share. Openness for me is hindered when I fear disclosure will result in rejection, a loss of love, or loss of respect. I buy into the lie that my weaknesses or struggles are not worth talking about with others. It is not just a matter of pride. It is a matter of sensing shame and disapproval in myself. I keep thinking I am suppose to be at an age where talking with others is no longer necessary. That allowing another person to walk me through issues is forbidden. Even as I write out the thoughts I can see all the lies that abound and how they have confined me to something God does not want for me.

God’s solution? Talk to the people He has given me to talk to and take the matter to Him in prayer. He is the One who will ultimately reveal the necessary truth. It may be He shows me the answer and it may be He shows the other person the answer. Either way we each get the benefit of seeing God work! While the joy will be ours the credit and glory will be His. Seeking another person’s advice and help does NOT mean I am replacing God with them….although that is an area I must continue to watch. It is simply operating within the boundaries He has established. My “lone ranger” mentality must give way to community. As a member of the body of Christ, it is imperative that I stop living as an amputated limb!

Father, I need You and I need the ones You graciously give to me. Heal those places of distrust and insecurity that abide in me. You are my true Healer but You have chosen to bring others into the operating room of my soul. Thank you. Amen.

Redemption and Reunions

Joseph said to them, “Do not be afraid, for am I in the place of God? But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive. Now therefore, do not be afraid; I will provide for you and your little ones.” And he comforted them and spoke kindly to them. Genesis 50:19-21 (New King James Version)

The countless offenses Joseph forgave became the distinct backdrop to an exquisite portrait of grace and mercy. Joseph was not in denial. He plainly stated the evil intent of his brothers along with the sovereign working of God. After years of separation from family and imprisonment, Joseph came to see that God had never taken His eye or His hand off Him. What was meant to destroy him actually became the passage way to his life’s calling and vocation. By the time he was reunited with his brothers he was ready to provide for them, comfort them, and speak kindly to them.

I believe much of this was contingent on the fact that Joseph had fully embraced the truth that God meant the things in his life for good. It was not just a lofty thought to him. While his life entailed much pain, sorrow, and tears, he knew where the path ultimately led…..the saving of many lives including his and his family’s. He knew that only God could bring about such a story of redemption. That only God could bring beauty from his ashes. His incredible reunion with his brothers hinged on his personal connection with God and the acceptance of God’s plan for his life.

Within that context hope is born in me this morning. I am daring to believe that God could do such a work in me as He did in Joseph. He can redeem ANY story in my life that I allow Him to redeem. He can bring about reunions with individuals that I consider impossible. He can transform my internal world into a thing of beauty.

Joseph’s story far exceeds anything I have ever faced and that in turn helps me to see the possibilities of God’s intervention on my behalf. That is one of the reasons there were so many stories recorded in Scripture. It is so we can know that our stories too can be redeemed by the same loving, personal, devoted, and capable God.

Father, it is with joy and confidence that I offer to You my own story. Do Your work in me. Thank you for what I will see come of this. Amen.

Answering the Questions

And in the presence of his associates and the army of Samaria, he said, "What are those feeble Jews doing? Will they restore their wall? Will they offer sacrifices? Will they finish in a day? Can they bring the stones back to life from those heaps of rubble—burned as they are?" Nehemiah 4:2 (New International Version)

The decision to rebuild the walls of Jerusalem in the days of Nehemiah came up against criticism and skepticism by the enemies of God and His people. The same will be true for us whenever we take steps to draw closer to God, allow Him to work in our life, or begin rebuilding areas in our life. We have an enemy (Satan) who will be the quickest and loudest to bombard us with questions which are intended to discourage, distract, and dishearten us, but we can take refuge in the truths of God’s Word and the truth of Who is actually working in us!

Two questions stand out to me from today’s verse that reflect some wrong mindsets I once held. “Will they restore their wall?” and “Can they finish in a day?“ Many have been the times when I thought I was one to do the restoring of areas in my life. If things had gone awry and I had gotten off tack I was under the impression that it was up to me to “fix” myself or my situation. Whether it was an area of bondage, addictions, sinful habits, character flaws, or insecurities, I actually believed I needed to somehow muster up the internal fortitude to bring about desired change. What I learned was THAT NEVER WORKS. While I may see some change, it will never be deep enough or last long enough. God is the One who promises to do a new work in me and God is the One who will bring about the transformation. It is true I must be willing to let Him work and cooperate with Him as He works, but He is the Restorer of my life, soul, and spirit. Therefore, I do not have to buy into the lie of Satan or myself that it is all up to me. Just as God enabled the Jews to work and protected them as they worked, He will do the same for me (and you).

At the same time, that which took years to “mess up” will certainly not be restored in a single day! That, too, was a lie that had to go. My spiritual journey, as well as yours, will last a lifetime. If I don’t understand that simple truth I will set myself up for disappointment and disillusionment when the change I am looking for is not quickly forthcoming. It is imperative that I look for the small changes that God brings about on a daily basis. That from time to time I look back and see advancements that have been made. I hang on the words of my Abba Father who promised to finish the work He started in me and when that is the case there will be NO doubt who did the work! He alone deserves the praise and glory for all that He does!

Father, I trust You for that which needs to be done in me and I trust You to work within Your perfect time table. Amen.

One Week

I am challenged this morning with the verse that says, "Be still and know that I am God." Much needs to be stilled in me internally, therefore, I am sensing a need to shut off my computer, set books aside, set CDs aside, and become still for one week. I covet your prayers as I am not sure all that will come of this.

Seeking Him,
Pam

He Gives the Ability

To grant us that we, being rescued from the hand of our enemies, might serve Him without fear, in holiness and righteousness before Him all our days. Luke 1:74,75 (New American Standard Bible)

When God led the children of Israel out of Egypt it was so they could live out the truths of this passage of Scripture. It was an incredible rescue that demonstrated God’s power and protection for His people. The whole battle really was the Lord’s as they did not have to do any of the fighting themselves. After seeing the plagues, walking through the Red Sea on a dry path, and watching their enemies perish, what could possibly cause them fear in the future? How could they look at anything else they would come up against as “too hard for God?”

But Scripture is not meant to read as mere interesting historical facts. It is meant to come alive to me in applicable ways. Every time I open my Bible, God wants me to see that the stories are meant to fuel my own faith and affect change in my internal world which will result in change in my external world.

I must realize that I too have been rescued from the hand of my enemies. My biggest enemy being Satan of course. But there are other enemies I have been rescued from….habits, addictions, generational bents, insecurities, past woundings, etc….. Now while my mind knows this to be true am I living out the truth of it? Do my actions match up with my knowledge? Or do I metaphorically still abide in the hands of my enemies?

I am encouraged by the little word “grant” in this verse. It means to enable or allow the fulfillment of something. When I trusted Christ as my Savior, God not only gave me His Spirit but He gave me everything I would need to live the Christian life. That means that as His child I possess the capability of serving Him without fear and in holiness and righteousness. It is not a matter of mustering up the courage, holiness, and righteousness on my own.

So this morning I once again start with the premise that I am God’s daughter with all the kingdom rights, responsibilities, and privileges that come with that position. May the truth of that make a radical change in the way I walk through this day!

Father, doing all things through Christ literally means doing all things through Christ. Let me see You as my Enabler. Amen.

Hidden From Our Eyes

When He approached Jerusalem, He saw the city and wept over it, saying, "If you had known in this day, even you, the things which make for peace! But now they have been hidden from your eyes.” Luke 19:41,42 (New American Standard Bible)

At one time Jesus spoke these words to Jerusalem and this morning He speaks them to me. I can hear Him saying, “If you had known in this day, but now it has been hidden from your eyes.” This life is filled with moments of seeing through a glass darkly. Countless are the stories that we don’t know the endings of yet. Oh, yes, we know that ultimately we will be in Heaven and all will be well, but for now, on this earth we don’t always know how things are going to turn out. Hence, we walk by faith and not by sight. We hold the hand and trust the heart of our all seeing and all knowing God. He alone knows the beginning from the end. He alone knows what lies ahead and the avenues He will use to take us to each point.

We are not alone. Many are the examples in Scripture of people who faced situations and didn’t know what God would do and how God would work. A few come to mind even now. Abraham ascending Mount Mariah with his son, Isaac. Moses and the children of Israel sandwiched between the Red Sea and the Egyptian army. Joseph being led to prison. Ruth leaving the land of Moab. David being chased by King Saul. Esther standing in the courts of a palace. Peter in prison. Paul on the road to Damascus. In each case, God’s ways and thoughts were higher than their own. Even in their wildest dreams they could not have imagined what God had planned all along.

Such examples give me hope, for there are numerous “endings” in my life that are presently hidden from my eyes. I know what I would like to see happen. I know what I question will ever happen. Before my eyes actually see what God will do, there are lessons to learn, spiritual muscles to develop, “Thy will be done “ statements to be made, obedience to walk in, hands to open in yieldedness and submission, and a heart to daily draw closer to the One who can be completely trusted. Joy comes when my delight is found in knowing and following the One who knows what He has in mind for each of my situations and the day it will no longer be hidden from my eyes.

While I do not see all the endings of my stories yet, there are some things I am learning to see. Things such as: God’s faithfulness, forgiveness, provision, power, presence, fingerprints, ministry through others, and heart. He is lovingly enlightening the eyes of my understanding and safeguarding within me a teachable spirit. Praise Him!

Father, thank you that one day I will see it clearly. Until then may my eyes be fixed on You, the Author and Finisher of my faith! Amen.

It is a Process

Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. 2 Corinthians 4:16 (New King James Version)

It is easy to become discouraged over the seemingly slow process of spiritual growth. I am learning (relearning) the truth that God’s work in me is NEVER at warp speed. It took years for me to grow physically, mentally, and emotionally, and it will take a life time for me to grow spiritually. The renewing of my internal world is a day by day process. Even though I am in a hurry, God is not. He wants it to last and to run deep.

He knows my tendency to just want to learn a lesson and move on. Many are the times I think, “Just give me the missing puzzle piece for this problem and I am good to go!” And my Father has to then take me aside and correct my faulty belief. He wants me to understand that each trial and difficult situation I face is not to be looked at as an individual puzzle that needs to be put together only to quickly move to the next one. The entire course of my life is a “puzzle” that God is masterfully putting together to bring about His portrait of beauty. Lessons learned from one experience will be carried over to the next. He does not waste time, material, or opportunities to teach me His tools for living.

While it is necessary for me to see this, it is also necessary for me to see things to avoid.

*Comparing my life with others. I must see that each portrait that God works on is unique and special. He makes no duplicates.
*Dishonesty. Hiding the truth or denying what is really going on inside my heart and head will not work. God requires truth in the inward parts and He will bring me to the point of honesty each and every time. This morning it was once again a matter of admitting to Him and myself my core beliefs about situations and individuals.
*Distrust. Nothing does more damage to my ability to follow and embrace Him with abandon than that of not trusting Him to do what He says He will do and be what He says He is.

May I, like Solomon, ask God to teach me the very things I am not skilled in.

Father, I so often come to You with an “all grown up” mentality but in reality I am still a child in many respects. Help me to learn and grow at the rate You know is best. Amen.

That Which Releases

Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. Matthew 7:7,8 (New American Standard Bible)

We all have them! Questions that baffle us and answers that elude us. I called a friend last night and asked her something, hoping she would know what I was failing to see. She knows me well and knows the present path I walk…stumbles and all. I wanted to see if she knew what was hindering me from letting go of some things I was holding on to. What was the “hook” that kept me connected to something I really did want to be free from and all the emotions that come from remaining linked to it? While she did not have THAT answer, she did agree to pray about it with me and ask God to reveal what I needed to know.

That is exactly what Jesus is inviting us to do in today’s verse. We asked and the answer came to me this morning within the first few moments of being awake. God let me know something I was not doing that I needed to start doing in order to be released from the past. In essence He said, “You are not praising Me or thanking Me. Start doing both and you will experience the freedom you crave.” The simplicity of His answer was amazing yet profound. It was a basic I had missed and yet it was the very thing that was necessary.

When I look back I can see some things that I did which were good to do. I grieved and felt my emotions. I admitted what was going on inside me. I stated the truth of what God was doing in my life. I read books and sat under wise counsel. I opened closed fists and identified areas of resistance. But I failed to do all of that out of a heart filled with praise and thanksgiving. Hence, the “hook” stayed in place. So what does that praise and thanksgiving look like?

It starts with acknowledgement of who God is and what God is like. Praising Him for His attributes and character. The Psalms are filled with such praises. Joined to that are a multitude of things to be thankful for, such as: growth that is coming, His purposes that are being fulfilled, lessons being learned, gifts of friendship, ministry to others that will come, His comfort, His strength, His presence, His peace, and a growing awareness of my constant need of Him. It is what will bring release and I am thankful for God’s reminder to me.

Father, I asked and Your answer astounded me. May my praise and thanksgiving to You abound! Amen.