An Inability to Rest

Then his servants came near and spoke to him and said, My father, had the prophet told you to do some great thing would you not have done it? How much more then, when he says to you, Wash, and be clean? 2 Kings 5:13

The simplicity of Naaman’s healing was astounding. He merely had to wash seven times in the Jordan River and his leprosy would be completely healed. Leprosy was a disease that carried with it a great deal of stigmatism and separation for the victim. Much like AIDs in our day. But instead of being grateful, Naaman was insulted by the option that was given to him. As he stormed off in rage, his servants came along side him with much needed insight and wisdom. They knew he did not lack fortitude. He would have done the most difficult task assigned to him. What he lacked was an obedient, humble, willing heart.

I find it interesting that many people have the same reaction to the Gospel message. The fact that salvation and connection to God is based on grace alone is unacceptable to them. Instead of accepting God’s offer as a gift, they walk away to begin working their way to heaven. I marvel at the tirelessness of people in false religions and cults that emphasize works over grace.

Sometimes they are driven by pride and self-sufficiency. But other times they just cannot conceive of a God who is so generous and loving. The image does not match what they have been taught or lead to believe. Or maybe they have just given up hope because they believe the lie that they have out-sinned God. I spoke with my 70 year old step dad one time and he shared his reason for not accepting Christ. He said he just doesn’t deserve to be forgiven for all the sin in his life. How sad! Unless God opens his eyes to the truth about mercy and forgiveness he will spend an eternity in hell because he felt unworthy to accept God’s free gift.

I also find it interesting how many believers have a ‘works’ mentality when it comes to their Christian life. They received God’s free gift of salvation but then felt like the rules had somehow changed once they became a Christian. For 30 years of my Christian life I fell into this very mindset. I believed God’s love was dependent on what I did and yet I could never seem to do enough. No matter how involved I got in Christian service I never seemed to be able to just rest in God’s unconditional love for me. In my mind, He tolerated me more than loved me. He was not the one I felt comfortable talking to. My sanguine personality caused others to think I was walking in joy but internally I was empty, self condemning, and unable to see God as a loving heavenly Father.

Seeing that God’s love for me as His child is unconditional has changed my whole life! I see many Christians in the same place I use to be and it breaks my heart. I am burdened for them to taste this aspect of God. I long to see them experience God in a way that is foreign to them now. May I be willing to come along side them, like Naaman’s friends, and help them see God for who He really is.

Father, for so many decades I knew so little about You. I had salvation and a lot of head knowledge but I walked empty. Thank you for redirecting my steps. I have a long way to go but I love the journey to Your heart. Amen.