Losing Sight of Others

He must increase, but I must decrease. John 3:30 (King James Version)

John’s words were clear and to the point to any who looked to him as their leader, guide, teacher, or source. The Message Bible puts it this way, This is the assigned moment for him to move into the center, while I slip off to the sidelines. The NIV puts it this way, He must become greater; I must become less. However it reads, the truth I must grasp is the necessity to fix my attention on Jesus more than on His messengers and servants. It is an ongoing struggle for me to do so. I know myself too well. I have a propensity toward becoming enamored with people. I have experienced making significant people the center of my world and I have experienced the pain of having that world crumble. I am not proud of this aspect of myself but I am aware of it and honest about it. I see it for what it is and desire change.

This weekend I had the privilege of attending a Beth Morre simulcast. Of all the things I took away with me (and there was plenty to take away) the most profound aspect was a prayer I have begun to voice to God. My prayer is that He would give me a heart that delights in Him, is enamored with Him, excited about Him, passionate for Him, and fully captivated by Him. I long for Him to not only be the center of my world but to be my world! As far as I am concerned, there is no other way to pull my heart away from people and on to Himself. The idols of my heart will not lose their grip on me or place in me until He takes center stage.

Recently, God has begun showing me aspects of my heart, addictions, and longings, and the view is not pretty. The issues are many and at times over whelming. I feel like a small child holding a large tangled ball of yarn. If left on my own, untangling it is too daunting. Today was a day I lifted the ball of yarn to Jesus and, with tears streaming down my face, asked Him to help me straighten out the mess. I am desperate to be whole and healed. I am hungry to know what it is like to walk in freedom with a sense of security and identity that can only be found in Christ.

The journey I am on has taken a turn. I use to view it as a path to walk on in various terrains. Now it has become a frozen pond on which to skate. I have the skates on and am on the pond. But learning to skate entails many falls and hard landings. I am aware that the ability to stay up and move more gracefully will come with time. For now, each time I fall must be followed by a decision to stand up again. To try again. To get a little further. Each time.

Father, the support beams have been removed once again. You are my hope. Teach me to look to You. Help me to delight in You and live with the awareness that You delight in me. I stand up again and move forward. Amen.

You Are My All In All - Dennis Jernigan
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9Up58OEtps

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.