The Nathans in My Life

Then Nathan said to David, “You are the man!……..You struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword and took his wife to be your own. You killed him with the sword of the Ammonites. 2 Samuel 12:7,9 (New International Version)

Nathan was used of God to pinpoint an area of sin in David’s life. God revealed it to him and he was faithful to deliver the message. I don’t believe this conversation was comfortable for either man but it was necessary. It led to forgiveness and change.

Throughout Scripture there are many accounts of people being God’s spokesman or spokeswoman to others. Good followed when words were delivered out of obedience and received as truth. Sure there were times God sent angels, but more often than not God sent people to people. He did it in Bible times and He does it in our day and age.

This past weekend was one such time for me. Two separate conversations. Two separate women as God’s mouthpiece to me. One message with several points. God had been preparing my heart so that when the time came I would be willing to listen and heed the words. I was not looking for a comfortable conversation. I was looking for answers that would lead to freedom. I was looking for the truth. There is no question in my mind that I needed to see the underlying issues of my personal problems. I share them with you now because I treasure them as gifts.

God’s message to me through two dear friends:

Choose to be Christ focused instead of self focused.

Learn to love God with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength.

Start believing that God is who He says He is and can do what He says He can do.

Every last emotional battle I fight is a sign of self focus at its worst. The only way to conquer that is to focus on Christ and to love God fully. Both require His help and both He is willing to help me do. I am taking the first steps in believing that God really can deliver me from my damaging mindsets and change me completely. Not only CAN He do it, He WILL do it! No doubt about it!!!

Father, thank you for those who love You enough to speak the truth in love to me. I heed Your words through them and I thank You for the change You will bring about. Amen.

For Good
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uzrGFQysfYU

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Empowered Change

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. Colossians 3:16 (New King James Version)

God’s Word uses words that are multi-layered with meaning and richness. If we do not go beyond our limited scope of a word we will miss some big truths. The word ‘dwell’ is one such example. Upon first glance, I can think of it as merely being ‘in’ me, but a word study showed me a broader picture. It also means to influence and influence is a word that is rich with meaning. When someone or something influences me it changes me. When God’s word influences me it not only changes me but empowers me for that change. That is what I am hungry for this morning…..empowered change.

I just finished reading through the first three chapters of Ephesians. I was struck by all I am and all I have in Christ….all spiritual blessings, chosen before the foundations of the world, adopted by Him, accepted in the beloved, redeemed, forgiven, wisdom, prudence, an inheritance, sealed by His Spirit, raised and seated with Christ, saved by faith, God’s workmanship, access to the Father, a fellow-citizen, a habitation of God, a partaker of His promises, and confidence in Him. I read the list. I wrote it out in a notebook. I reworded it for personal effect. Then I asked myself a heart searching question.

If I am and have all that in Christ why am I living so far removed from its truth? I am rich in Christ and yet live as a pauper. If I found out I had $100,000 in the my bank account, I would live like I had $100,000.00. I wouldn’t be like the person I read about the other day who lived in a shack, dressed poorly, and collected empty cans for money while living with bundles of money in his home. Yet, on a spiritual plane I am doing the same thing if I am not living out of the truth of who I am and what I have in Christ. It is a truth that must not simply dwell in me but it must influence me as well. At the same time, I realize the changes I want will not come about naturally or in my own strength. On my own, I will continue to cycle in and out of victory and defeat. In Christ, I have hope, power, and change.

Father, change the patterns of thought and behavior in me. You are my starting point and resting place. Amen.

I Am His Daughter
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKh3wF7DBPk&feature=related

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

The Corridors of Life

When Pharaoh heard of this matter, he sought to kill Moses. But Moses fled from the face of Pharaoh and dwelt in the land of Midian; and he sat down by a well. Exodus 2:15 (New King James Version)

From the palace of Egypt to the wilderness of Midian, Moses entered a corridor of time that lay between his past and his future. From the loving, nurturing care of a father to the prison life of Egypt, Joseph entered his corridor. From the homeland of Moab to gleaning in the fields of Bethlehem, Ruth entered her corridor. From tending his father’s sheep to hiding in the wilderness, David entered his corridor. Many of my Bible ancestors experienced what it was like to leave what they knew to enter a time of wilderness living known as a corridor of passage. None of those places were permanent or comfortable but all were chosen by God to prepare them for His call on their life. We are no different.

This month of February, marks my seventh year of being on a significant journey with God. It began with a decision to leave a life of legalism and performance-based mindset to live with an awareness that God’s love is not dependent upon what I am doing. I entered a time of spiritual nurturing under the care of a significant person and God used her to equip me with many of the tools I still use today. It was a place of familiarity to me…my palace, my Moab, my homeland. On my own, I would have chosen to stay, but God had other plans. He wanted more for me and hence led me into my own personal corridor of preparation away from my place and person of comfort.

Like those who have gone on before me, I am spending years in this corridor. I do not believe this is permanent but rather a necessary place for now. What I am learning and what God is doing is meant to prepare me for His call on my life. I don’t know what that call will look like but He does and He knows what it will take to get me ready. I will be honest, I have not made the transition with ease or joy for the most part. Going from what felt safe and comfortable to what seemed like the darkest time of my life was terrifying at best. My emotions have been all over the map of my soul and yet no amount of questions, tears, or hindered steps have caused my Father to change His course of action. Out of an act of love and purpose, He closed the door of what once was, to lead me toward what will be. He has not left me. He has not given up on me. He has not let go of me. He will help me to rest in His loving heart and embrace this corridor of time with abandon so that my heart, attitude, and reactions take on a different flavor.

Father, oh how I have needed a shift in my spirit. My fear of letting go has prevented me from fully reaching forward. I give you my heart and my hand this morning. Lead on, Oh King Eternal. Lead on. Amen.

You Never Let Go - Matt Redman
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqqtyuivolA&feature=related

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

When I Don't Understand

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5 (New King James Version)

There are times when the questions of my heart go far beyond my ability to understand certain aspects of life. When there just doesn’t seem to be plausible answers for me to rest in. When the questions that start with “why” are not met with satisfying answers. It may be the circumstances of life, the actions of another, or any number of issues. Whatever the case may be, in the end it will come down to a matter of trust. Not trust in myself or trust in another individual, but trust in the Lord. To take whatever has been handed to me that produces more tears than joy or questions than answers and hand it over to Him for safe and proper keeping. To entrust Him with my life and my heart.

Sometimes I can have something happen and not give it much thought. But other times it seems that I enter a mental maze of questions and searching that take me on a journey that is futile and never ending. There just isn’t anything that makes sense. No logic, no answers, no understanding and hence no peace, no joy, no contentment. Life comes to a standstill until I begin once again to live out the truths of Proverbs 3:5.

God wants me to understand that I don’t have to have things or people all figured out. The heart and motives of others are not discernable to me just as the root system of a tree is not within my view. When it is all said and done I have to concede that I just don’t know and that is when God says, “It’s okay. Trust Me. Trust Me to take care of you, to protect you, to satisfy you, to meet your needs, to love you. When those who have been primary encouragers to you have stepped away, trust Me to introduce you to new encouragers. When direction is needed, trust Me to give it. You are not on your own, you are not abandoned, you are not helpless. You have Me and I have a hold of you. Trust Me.”

I need the reminders. Sometimes they come from other Christians and sometimes they make their way from God’s mouth to my ears. Sometimes they enter my mind while I am sleeping and the thought jolts me awake like a charge of electricity. However it happens, it is enough to turn my gaze back toward God and to nudge me forward on my journey once again. How gracious of Him to allow me to trade my misunderstanding for confidence in Him!

Father, You know my thoughts and my feelings. I confide to You all the unanswered questions and find assurance in Your invitation to trust You. Speak the “Peace be still” to the storms of my soul. I take refuge in You. Amen.

Do I Trust You, Lord? - Twila Paris
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSopilUouw8

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Coming to My Aid

And He said, "Come!" And Peter got out of the boat, and walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But seeing the wind, he became frightened, and beginning to sink, he cried out, "Lord, save me!" Immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and took hold of him, and said to him, "You of little faith, why did you doubt?" Matthew 14:29-31 (New American Standard Bible)

I find it interesting what Peter did not do when fear filled his heart and he started to sink. He did not attempt to swim back to the boat he had stepped out of. He did not attempt to return to the position of walking on the water. He did not consult the other disciples. He did not give up. He did not beat himself up for failing to stay on top of things. He did however direct his attention back toward Jesus and asked for His help. That cry for help did not fall on deaf ears. Jesus’ first response was to take hold of him to lift him up and then He spoke the necessary words of instruction and correction to him.

Peter’s plight was progressive. He took his eyes off Jesus and fixed them on his circumstances. He drew wrong conclusions about his ability and God’s availability to keep him from sinking. He sunk in fear rather than walk in faith. Yet he knew enough to ask for help from the One who was present and poised to give him help.

I relate all too well with Peter. I can be impulsive and full of adventure one minute only to be filled with fear and spiral down the next. I can too easily allow circumstances and emotions to get the best of me. My answer? Do what Peter did and cry out to Jesus for help with full assurance that He will come to my aid.

I am learning how easily I can turn away from the One who invites me to abide in Him, come to Him, rest in Him, trust Him, and follow Him. Staying focused is a challenge for me and when I allow my mind to wander and heart to stray I sink. When I beat myself up for past failures I sink. When the opinions of others take precedence over God’s opinion I sink. When I fail to bring issues to God I sink. When I refuse to release my grip on that which needs to go I sink. But just as quickly as I sink I can be rescued, revived, and restored. At no point does God say, “Stay there!” At no time does He turn a deaf ear to my voice. When I want His help He gives it with an outstretched hand and heart of love. Then and only then does He begin to instruct me with words of correction. May today be a day for wave walking!

Father, it is what You do AFTER I fail that astounds me. Keep correcting the distortions I have of You. Keep showing me the truth about Yourself and allow it to change me. Amen.

Help Me, God - Kathy Troccoli
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sksuqT1lCUY

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

Essential and Purposeful Meditation

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things. Philippians 4:8 (New King James Version)

There are times when troubling thoughts, persistent regrets, and memories of failure can be what we continuously mull over in our mind. They become the fodder upon which our mind feeds. This is the epitome of meditation whereby we keep something front and center in our thoughts. Our thoughts feed our actions, attitudes, and words so it is imperative that we follow the pattern set out for us in Philippians 4:8. I know that and yet God is helping me to see an aspect I have missed. What I am thinking on must not only fit the criteria of being true, it must also be noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous, and praiseworthy. If it doesn’t fit the entire mold it shouldn’t be the thing I dwell on day in and day out. In essence, God is saying, “There are many things you can think on and you must choose the right ones.” My thoughts, just like my words, need to be such that they encourage, enlighten, and energize me. What I would not allow to come out of my mouth I must not allow to be dominate in my mind.

I have often made the mistake of thinking if something is true than I can’t help but think about it. It has been a recipe for disaster! Two examples of dangerous meditation for me have been regret over becoming emotionally dependent on a person and experiencing that person’s change of heart toward me. No tool of the enemy is more effective to bring me down than those two reminders. Both are true but God wants me to know they don’t meet the standards of today’s verse and therefore should not be what I focus on. They are opposite of what He spells out in His Word. Their effect brings death rather than life to my emotions, feelings, and moods.

Is it easy to change my thoughts? Not always. At the beginning, it takes a lot of hard work and continual decisions to choose what is right. So what should I think on? Scripture passages, present things that bring me joy, songs that are meaningful to me, the ways God has worked in my life, prayer requests and praises….the list is quite long. The bottom line is this: I can continue to touch the wounds that hurt or I can fill my mind with other things and eventually see the wounds healed.

Father, I am weary of my thought patterns. I want to move beyond the things that torment and torture me. Help me to think on the things that are beneficial and life giving. Amen.

You are Mine
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bm5ORb96vmQ&feature=related

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

The Healing of Wounds

'For I will restore you to health and I will heal you of your wounds,' declares the LORD. Jeremiah 30:17 (New American Standard Bible)

A phone conversation with a friend helped me to see an aspect of God’s restoration and healing that I have often missed. We were discussing times when things happen that cause painful memories to surface. Memories that we may have thought were safely tucked away. Hurts that we thought had become manageable. She shared something with me that God had been teaching her. When events happen and wounds are exposed it is like the removal of a bandage in order for the wound to be tended to. Each time this happens there may be additional pain involved but the wound is going through a process and will eventually be completely healed.

So often I want a quick, painless healing but that is not usually the case. Even though the wound may have taken only moments to be inflicted, it may take years for the wound to be healed. I am sure of a few things.

*As long as the pain continues to be felt, the wound is there, and as long as the wound is there God will faithfully tend to it.

*I am being changed during this process. I am not the same person I was when the wounding happened and I will not be the same person when it is all over. Growth, maturity, and wisdom will come of it. They will be the gold nuggets of my personal experience.

*The pain of each moment God tends to my wounds may last for several days but eventually joy and peace return. I must simply trust Him in the process.

*Along with healing, God is building a platform of ministry to others. The comfort and encouragement I have been blessed with along the way is what I will one day be able to give to others. There will be opportunities to teach others what I have learned. The day will come when I extend to a wounded individual the same help others are presently extending to me.

*No matter how deep the wound it is only temporary in light of eternity. My life is a vapor and so are my wounds.

*Healing and restoration are taking place even when I don’t see or feel it. God has promised to finish whatever He starts and when He is finished I will be amazed!

For now there may still be sorrow, tears, and pain to experience but I see it from a different perspective and invite God to proceed with the process of healing.

Father, You know my history as well as my future when it comes to the hurts of life. I yield to Your healing touch once more. Amen.

Power of Your Love - Hillsong
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ga6Qtxzd6vk

Holiness is a furnace that transforms the men and women who enter it. - Eugene H.Peterson

Breaking the Cycle

Saul looked at David with suspicion from that day on. 1 Samuel 18:9 (New American Standard Bible)

A victory celebration evoked a negative and dangerous emotional response in Saul when the women of Israel credited David with an accomplishment that outshined Saul himself. His resentment, bitterness, and suspicion was directed toward David (not the women) even though David was unaware of the feelings against him and had done no wrong himself.

I relate with Saul all too well. Many have been the times I have harbored thoughts and feelings against others when they themselves did nothing wrong and when they weren’t even aware there was a problem on my end. Disappointment or unmet expectations can often be the trigger for such feelings and then the battle is on! Eventually David could tell that Saul was hateful and hurtful toward him but he didn’t know why. The people in my life may sense something has gone awry but not only do they not know what it is they don’t even know I’m holding something against them. It is a vicious cycle that has repeated itself more often than I care to admit. When it is all said and done the sense of shame and regret is added to the mix and the mess I bring to God is astounding.

In the wee hours of this night, God is helping me to see how much I am holding on to which is causing me to eye people with suspicion (just as Saul did with David). There is no joy in relationships when I have a list of things I have taken personally and held on to with a death grip of great proportion. The answer to how I release the grip comes in stages.

First, I see that the problem lies in me NOT in the people I harbor the feelings against. It boils down to my own insecurities and high expectations of others. Second, I admit to God that I have been keeping track and a hold of the perceptions, emotions, and feelings. It has been my choice by my own will. Third, I ask for and received His forgiveness for believing the lies and acting out of those lies.

I will experience freedom and victory in this area as I take these steps each time disappointment or perceptions begin to pull me into a wrong mindset. It is a matter of my choosing to acknowledge and release that which seeks to control me. Does it work? Yes! Will it continue to work? Absolutely….as I choose to do it!

Father, the joy of this truth keeps me from cringing at my past track record. Amen.

May I Be His Love - Kathy Troccoli
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7B6ieQL_Q-k

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.

What He Will Never Say to Me

The virgin of Israel has fallen; she will rise no more. She lies forsaken on her land; there is no one to raise her up. Amos 5:2 (New King James Version)

The words stood out to me as read this verse. As important as it is to see what God says about me and to me in Scripture, it is just as important to see what He does not and never will say about me or to me. I have had my times of falling and will have more times in this life, but He will never say to me that I will not rise again, am forsaken, or have no one to raise me up. I rejoice in that truth.

I know the feeling or perception of rejection and I know the sting of loneliness but none of it comes from God. He is my present help in time of trouble. He is my rock and defense. He will never leave me or forsake me. He knew me and called me by name before I was even conceived. When I fall, He lifts me up. When others walk away, He is ever present. When the disappointments of life hit, He is my shelter and watch guard.

How often I need the reminders as it is all too easy to crawl into holes of dangerous mindsets and futile thinking. It is easy to take my eyes off my one true Hope and Security…..Jesus Christ.

I do not write these devotionals to try and convince people (or myself) that I have it all together. Instead, I write them with the full acknowledgement and awareness that I have a long way to go as do the ones who read them. I find it possible to acknowledge that ONLY because I know that God will never leave me in my brokenness, failures, and sin. He has not lost one ounce of love for me or stepped back by even a fraction of an inch. I have not exasperated Him or drained Him of His mercy. My relationship with individuals has suffered at times, but not my relationship with Him. I am secure, not because of me but because of Him.

As I read through the Old Testament and I take in God’s words to Israel that sound harsh at times, I rest in this age of grace. I don’t take it lightly and I don’t abuse it because it is free. I embrace it. The God who created me and loves me stands watch over me and cares for me.

Father, thank you for what You say and don’t say to me. Amen.

What Faith Can Do
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WTNBWv33-QI

Getting into God's Word and letting God's Word get into me one truth at a time.